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Miscellany

MJ is About to Become Roughly $300 Million Lighter in the Wallet, Give or Take a Few

Nice timing on the Jordan divorce, huh? Less than 24 hours before Saddam is hanged (have you seen the less-than-impressive, Blair Wiitch-like video?), and right at the close of business on the Friday before New Year’s Eve. Way to slide it in there, team of lawyers.

Anyway, a few notes on what will prove to be a costly split: Please don’t send Charles Oakley to kneecap us, or bitch-slap us like he did Tyrone Hill, but MJ, this is what you get for taking Reggie Thesus’ scraps.

Anyway, I have long suspected that the marriage was a sham. First, Juanita Vanoy was a sports junkie trolling for an athlete. She dated Bulls star guard Reggie Theus before Jordan. Jordan, under consultation from his mother, refused to marry Juanita until she would sign a pre-nuptial agreement. She was even pregnant with their first child, but Jordan would not marry her until she signed on the bottom line. Early in the marriage, Jordan was seen at various nightspots without the Mrs. Now, we hear that there was a post-nuptial agreement that was done three years into the marriage that redistributed the wealth (I would imagine that this would be around the birth of the second child).

That may have been taken from Jordan Rules.

Next point: who says blogs can’t break news? Mediatakeout had this story four weeks ago, but the only outlet that picked it up was the National Enquirer. They swear to us that something else big is coming. We wait.

Look on the bright side, MJ – you’re free to work anything with a pulse. If we could recommend some celebrity ass to tap, how about Gabrielle Union? According to various rumor mills, her ‘friendship’ with Vince Carter is why his marriage is on the rocks. And she once was married to a football player, so jocks are her thing.

Michael Jordan, Wife, File for Divorce (Chicago Tribune)

[Though we haven’t seen a hard copy of the Trib or the Sun-Times, all we could find online were unbylined articles on the divorce. Wow. Are people that afraid of Jordan that nobody would touch the story? It could be that we simply didn’t look hard enough, or everyone was on vacation and both papers were forced to run wire copy. Any Chicago writers up for de-mystifying a legend in 2007? Because it’s fairly obvious what happened in this marriage.]

 

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