Vomitting Phillie's Fan Sentenced To Jail

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“You have singularly identified yourself [as] ‘heartless,'” Dougherty said, referring to a tattoo on Clemmens’ forearm. “Your apology, I believe, is feigned.”

The most surprising piece of news is that this tub has a girlfriend. I bet she’s a real catch.

[Philadelphia Inquirer, Mugshot via USA Today]