Weekly Top Five: Rex Ryan, K-Rod's Fists of Fury & More Fighting
By Tim Ryan
1. Rex Ryan
CRM – Everybody loves a fat man that swears. That’s why everyone loves to read blogs. As amusing as Rex Ryan is, you have to remember that he’s coaching a severely overrated team. He’s pretty much the only redeemable character on the Jets. Everyone else annoys the shit out of me.
TSH – The popularity of Rex Ryan that will continue to grow through Hard Knocks has one tragic downside: There will be a bunch of Rex imposters trying to replicate his shtick. That’s going to suck and it’s going to be painful to watch. There’s only one Rex. He’s rough, rugged and raw, like Smif-N-Wessun. Additionally, Rex doesn’t give a shit and he does not give a fuck.
CRM – Too bad Mark Whalberg wasn’t working security in the tunnel. (That’s an Other Guys reference. Funny movie.)
3. LeBron’s Tweet
CRM – Does this mean that LeBron is coming after TBL? That rec league will never be the same. Sure, TBL will still be able to out-muscle LeBron in the post, but did you know that Jason is barely taller than Tim’s hairdresser? True story.
TSH – I kind of liked the tweet but I hated this picture of him in New York City yesterday. Bronnie Pippen’s got “being douchey” down to a science.
4. Reds vs. Cards
TSH – We need more real fights in baseball. With teams like the Royals and Pirates that have absolutely nothing to lose, why not spice things up and just start shit with every team they play? Suspensions wouldn’t matter, none of it would matter. We just need to make sure Farnsworth is traded back to the Royals.
CRM – I was just shocked to find that the Reds were good enough to talk about anyone.
5. The Douche That Let His Girlfriend Get Hit By A Foul Ball
CRM – Have you ever seen the True Life where the gossip blogger and douche bag live in the Hamptons for the summer? If that kid was from Texas, he’d be this kid. Smooth.
TSH – Foul balls continue to plague White America.
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CRM – She’s round, bro.
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Honorable Mention – The Expendables and a fucking hat!
CRM – This is the movie that we’ve all been waiting for. I saw it last night and HOLY SHIT it is awesome. It’s Rambo with all your favorite actions stars. The violence is incredible. Stallone must stay up nights thinking of new ways to end lives. I went to the midnight showing and probably would have stayed if they showed it again at 2.
TSH – The behind the scenes stuff has been tremendous. Austin put Stallone in the hospital (click on “Pt. 4 Fighting”).
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Query of the Week
So … Pippen, Worthy or Some Dude from Double Dribble?
Have one for Jimmy this weekend
[Cover grabs via NY Post; Images via Getty]