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Yardwork: K-Rod Unhappy With Role, and Chase Utley is a Meanie

Francisco Rodriguez might be one of the dumbest players in baseball, and I say that with unbridled sincerity. Since being traded to the Brewers he has, for the most part, played nice guy and said all the right things in regard to John Axford being Milwaukee’s closer. But now, with 12 games left in the season on a team preparing for the playoffs, he’s decided to chirp away like the predictable self-involved jackass we’ve come to know him to be:

“I’m not happy. That’s the bottom line for me. They told me one thing; they haven’t done it, and I stand by what I said … Don’t tell me something you’re not going to do. That’s what irritates me most.”

Whether that’s true or not is irrelevant at this point. When you consider his impending free agency and such little time left as a Brewer, there’s zero incentive to act like an ingrate unless K-Rod’s primary goal is to make less money in the offseason. I’m guessing his agent has already to him to shut up and suck it up for the rest of the way.

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Sports Illustrated recently conducted a poll of Major League Baseball players and Chase Utley finished second in the “meanest player” category. Finishing first, naturally, was chief antagonist A.J. Pierzynski, the true king of the “people hate me just by looking at me” face. But back to Utley, why him? Is it the hair? Is it his somewhat cocky demeanor? Is it the cursing? Or is it simply because he’s really damn good? If I’m a Phillie fan, I’m kind of liking this. It’s great to be hated.

Dodgers 3, D-Backs 2 — Clayton Kershaw plunked Gerardo Parra in the sixth inning and acted as though it wasn’t intentional. After Tuesday’s night heated exchange, sorry buddy, there’s no way you’re convincing anyone otherwise.

Blue Jays 5, Red Sox 4 — The Blue Jays put up three runs in the eighth inning thanks to the presence of unraveling reliever, Daniel Bard. He’s allowed 9 runs and walked 5 batters over his last 4 2-3 innings pitched. An unmitigated disaster to say the least. The Sox have dropped six of their last seven games.

Tigers 6, White Sox 5, 10 innings — The Tigers won their 12th straight in miraculous fashion, scoring three runs in the ninth (solo shot from Raburn, 2-run shot from Avila) to tie it up, and then went ahead for good on Carlos Guillen’s RBI single. Jered Weaver reportedly hated that last development. Detroit has the largest division lead in all of baseball. A month ago we were all preparing for a hilarious AL Central mess in the final weeks of the season. As Chris Berman might tell you every Sunday, that’s why they play the gaaaaaaames.

Braves 4, Marlins 1 — The Braves have momentarily gotten their shit together and won two straight to keep the Cardinals 4.5 games back. In even better news for Braves fans, Atlanta hosts the putrid Mets this weekend while the Cards head to Philly. Say goodnight, St. Louis.

Phils 1, Astros 0 — Doc pitched a complete game, six-hit shutout and struck out seven en route to Philadelphia clinching a playoff spot. The Astros are now just two losses away from the coveted 100-loss mark. If you’re going to royally suck, at least make some history while you’re royally sucking; the Astros are doing just that.

O’s 6, Rays 2 — Seriously?!? The Rays still have a ripe opportunity to make things tense and uneasy as they head into Fenway Park for a four game set beginning tonight.

Rockies 6, Brewers 2 — The alarming news out of this one? According to both Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun, this is “probably” the portly first baseman’s last season in Milwaukee. Additionally, celebrities and rock stars probably bang hot chicks. Seriously, any Brewers fan up in arms over this is more delusional than Joe Morgan.

Rangers 9, Indians 1 — The Tribe may have gotten pounded, but it could have been far worse if not for the defensive wizardry from Shelley Duncan in left field. No, that is not a typo.

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