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Actual Headline: "Dwarfs better off tossed than jobless, Florida republican says"

This story has it all. Dwarfs. Florida. Dwarfs. Representative Ritch Workman (which is obviously a fake name… wait, what? He’s real!? Awesome.) has introduced a bill to lift the Florida state ban on dwarf-tossing. This man is an American hero. From Bloomberg:

Dwarf-tossing, an event in which bar patrons throw little people in protective gear across bars onto mattresses, was banned in Florida in 1989 after opponents complained that it was dangerous and dehumanizing.

Why does he want to lift this ban? Job creation.

While Workman agrees that the practice is “repulsive” and “stupid,” he also thinks the ban inhibits job creation.

“All that it does is prevent some dwarfs from getting jobs they would be happy to get,” Workman told the Palm Beach Post. “In this economy, or any economy, why would we want to prevent people from getting gainful employment?”

This is the second time in a month we’re talking about dwarf-tossing. Thankfully, this time it’s back in its rightful home of Florida. It looks like America is finally ready to host a visit from the English rugby team.

[Belated h/t: Rusty!]

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