Ryan Braun’s overturned 50-game drug suspension may never have a written explanation because the rules surrounding the process of collecting a man’s testy urine are being changed. Like, right now. The players’ union and owners are reportedly in negotiations that would allow the overturned Braun decision back in late February to stand without written explanation.
Baseball’s labor contract says there should be a written decision within 30 days of an arbitrator’s ruling. It appears management has no interest in a decision detailing how collection procedures weren’t followed and the union has no interest in getting an explanation of a decision many believe let Braun off on a technicality.
Hilarious. So in the interest of not explaining that, perhaps, an MLB employee accidentally mistook Ryan Braun’s urine for a Red Bull-vodka, the league has opted to change the conversation in mid-conversation. Must be nice.
[Sidenote: It's still terribly early, but Braun is off to his worst start at the plate since 2008.]
While this abrupt addendum is being implemented, the collection procedure as it pertains to putting piss into a cup has also been revised: “Employees who take the specimens from players are now required to drop the samples off at a Federal Express office on the same day they are collected, provided an office is open in the vicinity.”
I would love to know what the specific rules were prior to this incident. Was a dramatic slow dance with the jar of urine permitted before the emotional parting? Perhaps the inevitable lab makeout session will now face stiffer penalties? We may never know.
In somewhat of a surprise, Braun, who has been painfully chatty on this topic, had no comment.
Previously: At Least One Member of the Milwaukee Media Seems to Be Sick of Ryan Braun’s Coy Act
Previously: Ryan Braun Prefers Not to Discuss Beating a Drug Suspension by Talking About Beating a Drug Suspension
Previously: Former Notre Dame Wide Receiver Takes a Shot at MVP/Alleged Cheater Ryan Braun
Previously: Ryan Braun is Struggling in Spring Training, Which Means Nothing (Yet)
Previously: Ryan Braun vs. Dino Laurenzi, the Urine Sample Collector. Who You Got?