Rick Reilly writes a few hundred words a week for ESPN.com and whenever there’s a major sporting event that a ton of white people will watch (horse racing, golf, I’m sure he’ll be in England for the Olympics), ESPN flies Reilly out to do one of his columns out loud. They probably pay for his meals and lodging as well as the airfare. Basically, it is the sweetest gig in the world. On Friday, while “on assignment,” at the U.S. Open, Reilly tweeted the following “bet:”
@ReillyRick: Write it down. At 2 p.m., PT, Friday, Tiger Woods took the Open lead and never looked back. … Bet me.
A quick glance at Twitter tells me that while 300+ people RT’d Reilly, only one actually bet him. Reilly now owes Cody Ploker a mention in a future column.
If only I followed Rick Reilly (/said no one) I could have bet him his job. If you’re thinking, “Reilly was just joking! You’re just jealous!” No shit. You aren’t? He’s got the easiest job in America besides the guy who runs the candy store down the street from the Odom house. (See how easy it is ESPN? Hire me! I’ll work for half Reilly’s salary! No! I meant a third!)
We have to remember, that this is Reilly’s own form of trolling. He is really no better than Skip Bayless at this point, but their methods of trolling are so different, you probably don’t notice. Bayless is a misleading, anger-inciting Hell troll who wants nothing but chaos and sadness while Reilly is simply the goofy troll who sits on a bench near a bridge and hurls anecdotes from The World’s 1001 Funniest Golf Jokes at passersby. He’s not really hurting anyone, but then again, he’s not really trying. We should be used to that by now.