MLB

Justin Verlander, Kate Upton's Boyfriend, Will Face the Yankees With A-Rod On Bench

After losing the first two games of the ALCS in the Bronx, the New York Yankees have the wonderful privilege of facing Tigers ace and expert poon swordsman, Justin Verlander for Game 3 in Detroit.

This lofty showdown has two possible outcomes, and only two: Verlander will either mow the Yankees down for eight dominant innings, all but nailing the coffin shut, or the Yanks will get to Kate Upton’s beau early and often, miraculously giving New York an unexpected sense of hope. However, based on Joe Girardi’s putrid lineup, the latter is clearly well beyond any semblance of reality.

Here’s how it looks: Brett Gardner will finally — finally — replace Nick Swisher and bat leadoff, followed by Ichiro, Teixeira, Cano, Ibanez, Russell Martin, Eric Chavez, Granderson, and Eduardo Nunez. So, despite the nation’s deep desire to witness a blazing inferno, there will be no Alex Rodriguez despite having good numbers against Verlander. Perhaps we’ll see him get a pinch-hitting opportunity in the late innings.

It’s understood that the polarizing third baseman brings a slew of negatives to the table, like his baffling addiction to striking out and his unwavering desire to reside in pound-town, but let’s be realistic for a change. Eric Chavez’s bat was euthanized well over five years ago and Eduardo Nunez is … Eduardo Nunez. Having said that, you can now expect this dynamic duo to combine for at least a couple home runs and a plethora of RBIs. That’s just how it works.

Previously: Kate Upton and Justin Verlander Dating? | Kate Upton Was at the Tigers Game on Saturday | Kate Upton’s GQ Video | Kate Upton’s Beach Bunny Promo | Kate Upton Thunders Up With Kevin Durant and James Harden | Enjoy Kate Upton in a Yankee Hat and Kate Upton’s Boobs Jiggling | Kate Upton Wishes Everyone a Happy Easter | Kate Upton Did a Carl’s Jr Commercial In Stockings | Kate Upton: 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Cover Girl | Kate Upton’s Booty Wins Friday | Kate Upton Walking the Runway in Slowmotion | Justin Verlander Was Not a Happy Camper Following a Complete Game Loss

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