Human Highlight Reel Jim Tressel Owned the Court During Charity Basketball Game

Jim Tressel donned a basketball jersey yesterday to compete in a charity basketball game in Ohio. Shockingly, he didn’t wear sleeves underneath. Here he is assuming the rare zero-threat position outside the three-point arc. There are a few things worth noticing.

First, it’s good to see the former Ohio State Buckeyes coach didn’t fall into the scandalous tattoo culture that permeated his program and, ultimately, led to his demise. His pipes remain an empty canvas.

Secondly, it looks like he’s letting the lettuce grow a bit. The only thing holding him back from the always-popular Andrew Bogut look is that pesky high hairline.

And finally, while Tressel doesn’t appear to be the finest athletic specimen, it should be noted that the guy trying to guard him doesn’t look like he possesses a tremendous amount of lateral quickness either.

Other participants in the game included Maurice Clarett, Mario Manningham, and Dan Herron.

Here’s some empirical data to contradict the headline.