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NFL Pigskin Pigsplosion Preview: Week 2

Four late games! And a paltry nine early games. The NFL scheduling continues to be the best. Let’s just get to it.

Pick’em’sp’losion’em’
Last Week:
Stephen: 5-11
Lisk: 6-10

Chargers (+7.5) @ Eagles
Stephen: Both teams will jump out to a big lead and then come crashing back to Earth in the second half. Only one team can blow the game though! [EAGLES]

Lisk: In Chip we trust. In the Chargers, we do not. However, we believe in that half point [CHARGERS]

cowboys-cheerleaders

Browns (+7) @ Ravens
Stephen: I had such high medium hopes for Cleveland. One last chance! [BROWNS]

Lisk: The Baltimore Ravens are throwing a lot of passes to Dallas Clark. This is not a good thing. [BROWNS]

Titans (+10) at Texans
Stephen: Chris Johnson is on my fantasy team. That’s why I’ve been acting so depressed lately. [TEXANS]

Lisk: Tennessee’s young defense impressed me last week. Will have to keep it low scoring to stay in it [TITANS]

Dolphins (+3) at Colts
Stephen: The Colts will need some *Luck* to win this game. [COLTS]

Lisk:  Indianapolis won this game last year with a late field goal. Another even matchup, except for how much the starting quarterbacks know about the teams and divisions in the NFL. [DOLPHINS]

Panthers (-3) at Bills
Stephen: This game will tie the NFL record for most black quarterbacks starting one game. [BILLS]

Lisk: So, I started C.J. Spiller, Marshawn Lynch AND David Wilson in a league last week. Good times. [PANTHERS]

redskins-cheerleader

Rams (+7) at Falcons 
Stephen: The League has been funny this season. [RAMS]

Lisk: Steven Jackson gets to pay homage to entire career with the Rams by racking up yards but no touchdowns. [RAMS]

Redskins (+8) at Packers
Stephen: How about this weather? [PACKERS]

Lisk: Robert Griffin III needs to get out of bounds when he runs in this one to stay healthy. And by that I mean completely beyond the bench so Clay Mathews doesn’t hit him [REDSKINS]

Cowboys (+3) @ Chiefs
Stephen: Brady Quinn is going to dominate. [COWBOYS]

Lisk: Here’s how much has changed since the last time these teams met. Miles Austin came into the game as an unknown with 23 career catches in 3+ years. He left with 10 catches, 250 yards, and the game winning touchdown. Now, it feels like he’s been around forever. [COWBOYS]

Vikings (+6) at Bears
Stephen:  Go Bears! [BEARS]

Lisk: Adrian Peterson will be too exhausted after spending the previous night with Gina Gibiatti [BEARS]

Saints (-3.5) at Buccaneers 
Stephen: We’re changing the capitalization rules every week. [SAINTS]

Lisk: I get it, Josh Freeman, team photos are a pain in the butt. [BUCS]

Lions (-2) @ Cardinals
Stephen: Reggie Bush is the greatest athlete ever. [CARDINALS]

Lisk: Suh is going to take a crap in Carson Palmer’s skull. Heat of the moment, man. Things happen. [LIONS]

Jaguars (+6) at Raiders
Stephen: This is as good a time as any for a Key & Peele video. [RAIDERS]

Lisk: I’m torn here. On the one hand, Raiders, a team who has no business as a favorite. On the other hand, Jacksonville is probably not worth playing for anything less than double digits as a letdown. Pass, but since I have to pick [JAGS]

Broncos (-4.5) @ Giants
Stephen: The Manning Bowl will just be dueling commercials in a few years. [GIANTS]

Lisk: Since 2005, the Giants are 17-10 against the spread as an underdog of more than a field goal. [GIANTS]

49ers (+3) @ Seahawks
Stephen: Could tie the record for most black quarterbacks to start the same game. [SEAHAWKS]

Lisk: Yet another game where two quarterbacks are not really playing for a shaved eyebrow. Yawn.  [49ERS]

Steelers (+7) @ Bengals
Stephen: Hiking the ball to himself is going to hurt Ben Roethlisberger in the long run. [BENGALS]

Lisk: Another proud franchise laying a big number, since Roethlisberger was drafted, Pittsburgh is 7-2 against the spread as an underdog of 5+ points, with 6 outright wins.  Also, this is one of those rivalry games between outdoor opponents with little home field advantage. Pittsburgh is 9-1 against the spread in Cincinnati. [STEELERS]

DEEP PARENTING THOUGHTS FROM JASON LISK: On raising the next Bill Belichick– I was searching through some old stuff and found this conversation from when my son was six (he’s now ten), and before I even started writing here:

I’m fixing breakfast this morning while also trying to play Battleship with my son at the table. We start a few round of guesses and then I have to take a moment to flip pancakes and get everything ready. When I get back to playing, he suddenly starts hitting my ships with each guess, and correctly guessing the direction that each ship is going without any misses. Needless to say, I’m pretty sure he looked at my ships while my back was turned. So I ask him. He tells me he is just getting lucky. I run some quick numbers in my head and tell him that he is getting a little too lucky. On his next guess, he hits my final ship. I tell him its a miss. He tells me he knows it has to be a hit.

I then try to lecture him on cheating. He tells me “but it’s easier to win when you cheat”. I’m assuming this is somewhat normal behavior for his age, but who knows? Maybe I have the next 3 time Super Bowl winning coach on my hands.

When I told him you shouldn’t cheat at Battleship or baseball or football, he asked me, in a shocked voice, “how do you cheat at baseball?” Now I’m a little worried that I told him too much. He’s going to be scuffing the ball or juicing by this time next year.

After last night, I’m even more worried, when the two year old was put in timeout but he insisted that the two year old be removed from the room completely before he would go to bed.

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