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NFL Pigskin Pigsplosion Picks: Week 4

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Week 4 already? We must be running out of steam. That’s why we couldn’t get this done on Friday. Too tired from football on Thursday. And Sunday and Monday. And college football on all of the other days. And Any Given Sunday being shown on Tuesdays.

Last Week
Stephen: 10-4-1
Jason: 6-8-1

Season
Stephen: 22-22-2
Jason: 17-27-2

Steelers (-2.5) @ Vikings
CRM: You guys watch Breaking Bad? (Vikings)

Lisk: I don’t watch as much English soccer as I should, so what would be the equivalent of exporting this game and letting them watch Matt Cassel? (Steelers)

Ravens (-3) @ Bills
CRM: You guys watch The Wire? (Ravens)

Lisk: I don’t watch either of those shows. Sobs. But I’m at least sure this comment makes geographical reference sense. (Steelers)

Cincinnati (-4) @ Cleveland
CRM: The battle of Ohio! And the battle for America’s Heart! (Bengals)

Lisk: You guys watch WKRP in Cincinnati? (Browns)

Indianapolis (-9) @ Jacksonville
CRM: Free beer for everyone! (Colts)

Lisk: I play golf better after two beers. I’m thinking Blaine Gabbert should try this to totally relax and improve his accuracy. (Colts)

Seattle (-3) @ Houston
CRM: Seattle. Seattle no matter what against anyone. (Seahawks)

Lisk: Letdown game for Seattle on the road after coming off that Jacksonville high. (Texans)

miami-cheerleaders

Arizona (+2.5) @ Tampa Bay
CRM: “A Jacksonville high” involves bath salts, paint thinner, malt liquor and whatever else you can find under the kitchen sink. (Cardinals)

Lisk: Mike Glennon is the third former N.C. State quarterback starting today, because when you think quarterback factory, you think Raleigh, North Carolina. (Cardinals)

Chicago (+3) @ Detroit
CRM: Is talking about how much I hate fantasy football better or worse than talking about my actual fantasy football team? (Bears)

Lisk: Kyle Long and Ndamukong Suh will, I am sure, make no headlines today. (Lions)

New York Giants (+5) @ Kansas City
CRM: I have no idea why I was one of 3 people in America who thought the Giants could make the playoffs. East coast media bias no doubt. (Chiefs)

Lisk: Last year, the Chiefs were dead last in turnover margin. Now, they are first. This would be why something that bounces is relevant here. (Giants)

saints-cheerleaders

New York Jets (+4) @ Tennessee
CRM: Chris Johnson almost looks like Chris Johnson again. Last season he looked like Ron Howard. (Jets)

Lisk: The Jets season ended last year with a bad loss at Tennessee. This year’s march to being at the Super Bowl begins in the same spot (New York is hosting and the Jets get free tickets, right?) (Jets)

Dallas (-2) @ San Diego
CRM: When will San Diego have to change their name? For years Chargers has been a racist term for electricity. (Chargers)

Lisk: This division belongs to the Cowboys unless they screw it up. That leaves me wondering who is going to win the division. (Chargers)

Washington (-4) @ Oakland
CRM: Loser gets to make fun of the Jaguars, but just barely. (Redskins)

Lisk: Washington should not be laying over a field goal against anyone at this point. (Raiders)

USATSI_7450464_153192880_lowres

Philadelphia (+11) @ Denver
CRM: Will all the other games Sunday be 0-0 what with all of the offense being used up by these two teams? (Broncos)

Lisk: A Chip Kelly reverse swinging gate Statue of Liberty 2 point conversion down 12 will be the difference. (Eagles)

USATSI_7455319_153192880_lowresNew England (+2) @ Atlanta
CRM: I’ve got nothing.

Lisk: Here’s a flashback for you. The last time the Patriots played in Atlanta, Matt Schaub almost led a big comeback, playing in place of Michael Vick. (Falcons)

CRM: I don’t believe you. (Patriots)

Miami (+7) @ New Orleans
CRM: Ryan Tennehill went to Texas A&M. You may not know this, but another pretty good quarterback is playing at Texas A&M these days. (Dolphins)

Lisk:  Ryan Tannehill is making everyone forget about his wife. (checks traffic history). Never mind. (Miami)

 

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