College Basketball

March Madness is a Busy Time for Getting That Vasectomy

Steve Alford snips the nets

This is a big week for breaking down seeds for lots of men around the country. According to KMBZ, the week of March Madness is also a big time to schedule that vasectomy so that you can rest comfortably on the couch for twelve hours a day of basketball.

A major clinic in Ohio reports it performs 40 or 50 more vasectomies a month before and during the 68-team basketball tourney.

Dr. Andrew Morris, a urologist here in the metro, agrees. He said he sees more patients than normal during the next couple of weeks.

Word or warning, though: it’s not always 2-3 days, and if you end up on more powerful pain relievers, you may miss that seminal moment when one lucky team hits a buzzer beater. Also, make sure that everyone knows that “no movement” restriction needs to be strictly enforced.

If you are contemplating whether to squeeze it in tomorrow or press your luck, keep this in mind–in a few years, you may be dealing with the school district scheduling Spring Break during the first week of the tournament–every single year. Talk about real March Madness.

David Ortiz takes a shot to the nuts

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