Roundup: Auctioning Virginity To Pay For Med School, Peeping School Janitor, Chad Johnson to CFL?

Bryana Holly … The Champions League Quarterfinal Draw … The Overprotected KidPaulina Gretzky visited a pool … Turkey shuts down Twitter … Russia bans John Boehner from entering Russia … Here’s what a $250 hamburger looks like … Starbucks to increase alcohol sales … Creepy janitor peeps at 11-year-old boy under stall door, smiles … Chicago public schools are giving away free condoms … Multiple monitors may decrease productivityPizza: The App … Gym reprimands woman for body being too fit … Fox News apologizes for lying to viewers about ObamacareParis Reborn and DestroyedAuctioning off virginity to pay for med school

College Basketball may start season later to avoid conflict with King Football. [Mercury News]

Tiger has a bulging disk. Paging Steve Levy. [Golf Week]

Angels trade Mike Scioscia’s kid for Wayne Gretzky’s kid. [LA Times]

Planet Fitness promises you no judgement, unless you are Muslim and try to wear a head covering. [Washington Times]

AP alters over/more than policy, fosters fierce debate only journalists care about. [Poynter]

Beer and story time with Verne Lundquist and Bill Raftery? [Time]

Indians fans start movement to eradicate Chief Wahoo logo. [Eye on Baseball]

Florida woman’s argument over McFlurry rationally ends in car getting torched. [Action News Jax]

NCAA had a $61 million surplus in 2013, enough to pay every player in the Men’s NCAA tournament more than $73,000. [USA Today]

Chad Johnson may be joining Montreal in the CFL, is still a thing. [The Gazette]

Hawaii exemption permits police to have sex with prostitutes. [AP]

MLS ends its referee lockout, mainstream sports fans shrug. [New York Times]

Five-star QB Josh Rosen verbally commits to UCLA. [OC Register]

Undertaker Highlights Set to Taylor Swift’s “22”

Drunk Baby trashes a bar.

Snake surprise

The GOP Hipster

The Whipping Post…

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