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2014 MLB Predictions From The Big Lead

Tori Hunter flips over the fence trying-to grab David Ortiz grand slam

The 2014 Major League Baseball season runs from mid-March(thanks for nothing, Australia) until the end of October. Here are our sure-fire, lead-pipe lock, write-it-in-pen, picks for the season. Be sure to file away and remind us all year how great we did!

American League East Winner

Cardillo: Tampa Bay Rays
T. Ryan: Baltimore Orioles
Duffy: Boston Red Sox
Lisk: Boston Red Sox
Glasspiegel: Baltimore Orioles
Douglas: Boston Red Sox
McIntyre: New York Yankees
Shamburger: Tampa Bay Rays

American League Central Winner

Cardillo: Kansas City Royals
T. Ryan: Cleveland Indians
Duffy: Detroit Tigers
Lisk: Detroit Tigers
Glasspiegel: Chicago White Sox
Douglas: Detroit Tigers
McIntyre: Detroit Tigers
Shamburger: Detroit Tigers

American League West Winner

Cardillo: Los Angeles Angels
T. Ryan: Texas Rangers. Somewhere behind them will be the Astros, who only finished 45 games out last year. Best of luck to passing the 50-plus mark this season.
Duffy: Los Angeles Angels
Lisk: Texas Rangers
Glasspiegel: Los Angeles Angels
Douglas: Oakland A’s
McIntyre: Texas Rangers
Shamburger: Los Angeles Angels

Rays walkoff-b

American League Wild Cards

Cardillo: Detroit Tigers, New York Yankees
T. Ryan: Boston Red Sox, Oakland A’s
Duffy: Tampa Bay Rays, Oakland A’s
Lisk: Oakland A’s, New York Yankees
Glasspiegel: Tampa Bay Rays, New York Yankees
Douglas: Texas Rangers, Cleveland Indians
McIntyre: Boston Red Sox, Cleveland Indians
Shamburger: Boston Red Sox, Oakland A’s

National League East Winner

Cardillo: Washington Nationals
T. Ryan: New York Mets? Ha, no, but that clip gets me every time. Washington Nationals.
Duffy: Atlanta Braves
Lisk: Washington Nationals
Glasspiegel: Atlanta Braves
Douglas: Washington Nationals
McIntyre: Washington Nationals
Shamburger: Atlanta Braves

National League Central Winner

Cardillo: St. Louis Cardinals
T. Ryan: Cincinnati Reds
Duffy: St. Louis Cardinals
Lisk: St. Louis Cardinals
Glasspiegel: Cincinnati Reds
Douglas: St. Louis Cardinals
McIntyre: Milwaukee Brewers
Shamburger: St. Louis Cardinals

National League West Winner

Cardillo: San Francisco Giants
T. Ryan: San Diego Padres, thanks in part to their 1-game winning streak.
Duffy: Los Angeles Dodgers
Lisk: Los Angeles Dodgers
Glasspiegel: Los Angeles Dodgers
Douglas: Los Angeles Dodgers
McIntyre: San Francisco Giants
Shamburger: Los Angeles Dodgers

Yasiel Puig bat flip and triple NLCS Game 3

National League Wild Cards

Cardillo: Los Angeles Dodgers, Atlanta Braves
T. Ryan: Pittsburgh Pirates, Los Angeles Dodgers
Duffy: San Francisco Giants, Washington Nationals
Lisk: Atlanta Braves, Arizona Diamondbacks
Glasspiegel: Arizona Diamondbacks, SF Giants
Douglas: Atlanta Braves, San Francisco Giants
McIntyre: Los Angeles Dodgers, Chicago Cubs
Shamburger: San Francisco Giants, Washington Nationals

American League Championship Series

Cardillo: Tampa Bay Rays over Los Angeles Angels
T. Ryan: Oakland A’s over Boston Red Sox
Duffy: Boston Red Sox over Los Angeles Angels
Lisk: Texas Rangers over Boston Red Sox
Glasspiegel: Orioles over A’s
Douglas: Indians over Red Sox
McIntyre: Yankees over Red Sox
Shamburger: Rays over Red Sox

National League Championship Series

Cardillo: Los Angeles Dodgers over Washington Nationals
T. Ryan: Pittsburgh Pirates over San Diego Padres
Duffy: Los Angeles Dodgers over St. Louis Cardinals
Lisk: Washington Nationals over Los Angeles Dodgers
Glasspiegel: Dodgers over Braves
Douglas: Dodgers over Cardinals
McIntyre: Dodgers over Nationals
Shamburger: Dodgers over Braves

World Series winner

Cardillo: Tampa Bay Rays
T. Ryan: Pittsburgh Pirates. Choo-choo, bitch.
Duffy: Boston Red Sox
Lisk: Washington Nationals
Glasspiegel: Baltimore Orioles
Douglas: Cleveland Indians
McIntyre: LA Dodgers
Shamburger: Los Angeles Dodgers

MVPs

Cardillo: Mike Trout, Buster Posey
T. Ryan: Derek Jeter, Bryce Harper
Duffy: Mike Trout, Bryce Harper
Lisk: Miguel Cabrera, Paul Goldschmidt
Glasspiegel: Mike Trout, Bryce Harper
Douglas: Miguel Cabrera, Yasiel Puig
McIntyre: Mike Trout, Bryce Harper
Shamburger: Mike Trout, Yasiel Puig

Cy Young Winners

Cardillo: Felix Hernandez, Stephen Strasburg
T. Ryan: Masahiro Tanaka, Jose Fernandez
Duffy: Yu Darvish, Clayton Kershaw
Lisk: Yu Darvish, Stephen Strasburg
Glasspiegel: Felix Hernandez, Clayton Kershaw
Douglas: Felix Hernandez, Jose Fernandez
McIntyre: CC Sabathia, Stephen Strasburg
Shamburger: Yu Darvish, Stephen Strasburg

Prince Fielder belly flop ALCS Game 6-a

Home Run Champs

Cardillo: Prince Fielder, Giancarlo Stanton
T. Ryan: Miguel Cabrera, Pedro Alvarez
Duffy: Miguel Cabrera, Paul Goldschmidt
Lisk: Miguel Cabrera, Paul Goldschmidt
Glasspiegel: Miguel Cabrera, Paul Goldschmidt
Douglas: Miguel Cabrera, Giancarlo Stanton
McIntyre: Chris Davis, Jay Bruce
Shamburger: Miguel Cabrera, Giancarlo Stanton

BEARD OF THE YEAR

Cardillo: Josh Collmenter, Arizona reliever.
T. Ryan: Someone on the consistently hairy Oakland A’s.
Duffy: This gent is already ahead of the pack.
Lisk: Jacoby Ellsbury will take what he learned from others and totally turn the Yankees’ beard culture.
Glasspiegel: Andrew Cashner
Douglas: Brian Wilson
McIntyre: Edward Mujica, Boston
Shamburger: Elvis Andrus

Washington Nationals v Houston Astros

BELLY OF THE YEAR

Cardillo: Japhet Amador, narrowly edging Jesus Montero.
T. Ryan: Bartolo Colon
Duffy: David Wells
Lisk: The Molina Family
Glasspiegel: Someone at Wrigley Field, spilling over both armrests in his seat.
Douglas: Mr. Met after Mrs. Met leaves him for a more functional situation.
McIntyre: Everyone who attends games in Texas and Florida.
Shamburger: Alex Rodriguez.

BOOBS OF THE YEAR

Cardillo: Morganna the Kissing Bandit, who makes a shock return to the ballpark in 2014 and teaches America how to laugh again.
T. Ryan: Bartolo Colon. The hope is that we avoid any and all nip-slips.
Duffy: Overly-aggresive baseball obtainers.
Lisk: Justin Verlander’s girlfriend
Glasspiegel: See entry for ‘belly of the year’, now think shirtless.
Douglas: I don’t think there are any Bobs in baseball this year. That’s a tragedy.
McIntyre: Lindsey Duke.
Shamburger: Libby Powell, Emily Sears, Samantha Hoopes, any other Friday Roundup girl.

BIRD OF THE YEAR

Cardillo: Hawk Harrelson’s sausage racer.
T. Ryan: Bird Selig, again. Though J.R. Towles could give MLB’s signature bird a serious run for his money.
Duffy: Larry, as always.
Lisk: The Shoebill, who, like Brian McCann, disapproves of your lack of baseball acumen.
Glasspiegel: Abstain.
Douglas: Marquis Hilton, Baltimore
McIntyre: Larry.
Shamburger: This Arkansas fan

JR Towles

WORST PLAYER of the year

Cardillo: Cole Hamels.
T. Ryan: Ryan Howard. Too bad this award wasn’t around when Anthony Young lost 27 straight decisions.
Duffy: Ryan Howard, only four-years $98 million left.
Lisk: Skip Schumacher, exacerbated by being named Skip and always appearing on good rosters.
Glasspiegel: Derek Jeter, which will be exacerbated every time the Yankees are on national TV, he’s getting myth-made by the announcers, and Twitter collectively groans.
Douglas: T. Ryan.
McIntyre: Steve Balboni.
Shamburger: Astros.

MOST ANNOYING PLAYER OF THE YEAR

Cardillo: Nick Punto.
T. Ryan: Jose Valverde and his signature mound karate.
Duffy: The collective media fawning over Jeter will get rather intense come mid-July.
Lisk: Obviously, Jeter, for any of us that do not live inside New York City
Glasspiegel: Yasiel Puig; not by his own doing, but by the reverse phenomenon I discussed in ‘worst player’.
Douglas: New York Yankees
McIntyre: Anyone Everyone on the Red Sox.
Shamburger: Red Sox and Yankees

*****

bartolo-colon-thumb-340x510-4409

On a final note, Bartolo Colon would simply like to say “burp.”

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