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Roundup: Donald Sterling Banned from Bunny Ranch Brothel, Dan Patrick to Host Sports Jeopardy, Florida Men Do Florida Things

katrina2Katrina Brodsky … Donald Sterling also got banned from Nevada’s Bunny Ranch brothel  …  Big Mac taco (!!!!!) … West Virginia students arrested with 20 pounds of weed and $40k in cash … Florida man tries to buy $263k Bentley with counterfeit check … Florida Senator wants to suspend concealed weapons laws in case of zombie apocalypse … Florida frat rush documents leak, and they’re about what you’d expect … Guy taking selfie gets attacked by a squirrel … Scary World Health Organization report on antibiotic resistance … Buy Yogi Berra’s house for $888k … Andy Warhol made this art over 30 years ago on a Commodore Amiga PC … Worst headgear in wrasslin’ history … Tennessee passes law to prosecute pregnant women for taking drugs … Analyzing the data on film critics’ reviews … Carrie Underwood wore a flowery dress to TIME’s 100 most influential people gala … If this 3D pen actually works like this, that’s just bonkers … R-Rated movie scenes as children’s book illustrations … Deceased fortune cookie company employee may have perished inside dough machine … Nike’s evergreen-themed LeBron kicks … Why Donald Sterling’s wife shouldn’t get a free pass in all this.

SI reporter Franz Lidz publishes new details from Donald Sterling cover story that were scrubbed from the original version: “[S]o much of his behavior — extreme parsimony, discriminatory practices, wild sexual escapades — was deemed too weird, too cruel, too contemptible. An editor told me, ‘You’ve demonized him.'” [Sports Illustrated]

Bill Simmons sat behind Donald Sterling on a flight last year, and documented it extensively (and entertainingly!) last night [Grantland]

It’s cheaper to buy medical marijuana in Colorado than to pay legal retail [FiveThirtyEight]

British Model and TV personality Peaches Geldof reportedly died of a heroin overdose [Times of London]

High school student who got into all eight Ivy League universities makes his decision [NY Mag]

Eight amazingly hot photos of Stephen Curry’s mom [Sports Pickle]

Dan Patrick to host sportsy version of Jeopardy [AP]

Who made the best and worst use of their draft picks from 2009-2013? [Sharp Football Analysis]

Jeff Goodman’s latest NBA mock draft goes Parker-Wiggins-Embiid [ESPN Insider]

Howard Megdal on Donald Sterling, Adam Silver, and Judaism [Sports on Earth]

Evaluating the importance of hand-size in NFL quarterbacks [Rotoworld]

Luther Campbell on Devonta Freeman: “I told him, ‘if you decide to go down the wrong road, then the chances of your brothers ending up in jail or dead will be greater.'” [Miami New Times]

Kiwi Gardner’s journey from YouTube sensation to impressive D-League rookie [Mashable]

Bob McGinn ranks wide receivers and tight ends ahead of the NFL Draft [Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel]

Comcast says the PR campaign discovered by Clay Travis in which supposed SEC fans didn’t want to pay for the SEC network was “not authorized to be implemented” [Fox Sports]

The story of a Pennsylvania killer who spent 33 years leading a double life in Texas [Penn Live]

#TBT: Erotic Guy Fieri fan fiction (obviously NSFW) [VICE]

Hamsters eating tiny burritos.

Dumb and Dumber cut up into a drama

Top ten wrestling comebacks of all-time features a healthy dose of Jim Ross and Jerry the King … WHAT’S HE DOING HERE?!?!?!

Liquid nitrogen bottle rockets [HT DPF]

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