Pigskin Pigsplosion: Will Dez Bryant Follow the Trend of Receivers Sealing Packers Playoff Ouster?

This is beginning to sound a little bit like a broken record, but there is not much football left in our lives this season. Saturday through Monday features five games that, perhaps excepting Seattle-Carolina, are must-see TV. After that, there’s just three real games left between then and Labor Day. Compounding matters, there’s no Olympics or World Cup to help tide us over this summer. All we’ll have to keep us busy is baseball and maybe — if we’re lucky! — LeBron decision speculation. Give this weekend the respect it deserves.

Last Week
Ryan: 2-2
Lisk: 3-1
Stephen: 2-2

Total Season Ryan: 129-126-5 Lisk: 121-133-7 Stephen: 126-130-4

Baltimore @ New England (-7)

Ryan: I only saw this because Lisk RT’ed it, but it was one of my favorite Internet things of the week:

As dumb as that sounds, we’re going to hear a lot of takes like that if the Ravens somehow win this game outright. The only times the Patriots have lost since September, though, were a nailbiter in Green Bay and in Week 17 when they rested key players. The Joe Flacco Playoff Assassin narrative could really use some pumped breaks. Patriots.

Jason: I would root for Florida State to beat either of these teams. Ravens.

Carolina @ Seattle (-11)

Stephen: I think the Panthers have a shot to win. Anyone know where I cant watch it at 1am in London? PANTHERS

Jason: Because I love you, this appears to be the list of sports bars in London willing to show the Panthers-Seahawks game. Also, I’m going to include you in the group texts during that game. Panthers.

Ryan: Without looking at Lisk’s link, the answer is Sports Cafe. It’s right on the outskirts of Piccadilly Circus, the London equivalent of Times Square, and they stay open until NFL playoff games end. That’s where I watched Favre throw an interception to Corey Webster, costing the Packers a trip to the Super Bowl. It was 35 degrees outside and I walked about two miles back to my study abroad dorm without putting on my coat. FUN!

I’m not gonna delete that paragraph, but after I wrote it up I just looked up Sports Cafe on Yelp and apparently it shut down. Heaps of NFL business was apparently not sufficient to support a massive sports bar in the heart of London. WHO KNEW. /Seahawks.

Dallas @ Green Bay (-6)

It goes without saying that Rodgers’ health is crucial to what the Packers accomplish, but the line is still decently high, which really reinforces the notion that this was a false panic. All week, though, the spread has seemed too high, and it feels like nobody is picking the Packers to cover. Is this one of those games where we’ll hear that 90% of the money was bet on Dallas?

While the golden calf has been the prevailing storyline this week, not enough has been made about how terrifying the Cowboys are on offense when they’re clicking. Tony Romo’s broken back has almost become a distant memory, DeMarco Murray might be the best running back in the league, and Streaky Dez Bryant is a terrifying force. The Packers gave up 259 yards receiving to Julio Jones a few weeks ago, and it would’ve been more if the receiver did not leave with an injury. I’m haunted by the memories of getting torched by receivers like Michael Crabtree (two straight years), Hakeem Nicks, Steve Breaston, and Plaxico Burress in playoff exits past, and the last thing I need in my life is Dez Bryant with 8 catches for 150 yards and two touchdowns right in front of me on Sunday.

In a contrarian move, I’m picking the Packers, but I wish I felt better about it.

Stephen: Well, if Ryan doesn’t feel great about the Packers’ chances then I don’t know who would. Especially against the Dallas Cowboys. This is a historic matchup that should garner a few hundred-thousand viewers at least. One thing to remember is that you can’t spell RATINGZ without RINGZ and the Cowboys don’t have any if you ignore the ones from the 70’s and 90’s. PACKERS

Jason: I was all prepared to take Green Bay and then Ryan laid out so many convincing points. Cowboys.

Indianapolis @ Denver (-7)

Stephen: This is the game for which the Colts have been saving Trent Richardson. As PFT’s MDS points out, Richardson has played two full seasons with the Colts and has yet to reach 1,000 rushing yards with Indy. Well, get ready Denver because you are about to suffer the misery of The Trent Richardson Game. Man, if Richardson rushed for a career high – which has to be what, 89-yards or something? – and a couple touchdowns and the Colts won can you imagine me taking credit for calling it? It wouldn’t happen because I forget about these posts 3-seconds after I hit SAVE, but still. COLTS

Jason: If Peyton Manning is still capable of throwing a forward pass after two weeks of sitting at home on winter break, then the Broncos win easily.

Ryan: I’ve made it this far so I might as well pick all four favorites to cover in this one to STICK IT to Schefty’s dumb gambling stat. Broncos.