A-Rod and Torrie Wilson Reportedly Broke Up

IMPORTANT baseball news on Feb. 4: Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson broke up. That’s what Page Six of the New York Post reported today, anyways. Try to contain your sadness and tears.

The Post story cites some reasons, such as Rodriguez’s ex-wife Cynthia remaining highly involved in his life — including business affairs. There’s one paragraph that might need to include an air-sickness bag with it before reading:

"Rodriguez and superfit Wilson, both 39, began dating in late 2011 and were often seen working out together. Wilson is popular in the Yankee organization, as she was seen as a “good, calming influence” over Rodriguez. A Yankee source said, “Torrie is a lovely girl. The last thing Alex needs now is to be single, dating and distracted by women.”"

Riiiiiiiiight. The Yankees’ brass is truly concerned over A-Rod’s personal life. There’s probably nothing the Yankee higher ups would want than A-Rod finding his way into the gossip pages. The Yankees, after all, reportedly tried to weasel out of performance bonuses in his contract for passing certain home run milestones.

The irony here is that A-Rod was basically in a George Constanza at Play Now Sports situation — a guy with a guaranteed contract, riding it out despite being loathed by management and co-workers. Now with all the anti-A-Rod rhetoric, the Yankees are, in earnest, helping turn him into a sympathetic figure.

Spring Training in Tampa will be a blast!

(Where’s that barf bag?)