What If Jim McNally Didn't Wash His Hands?

Jim McNally took some footballs into a bathroom with him in January. Four months later, we’re still talking about it. The Wells Report says he was in the restroom for 100-seconds. The Patriots say that’s the perfect amount of time for a dude to use the toilet, wash his hands, and return to the public.

"“The report does not address whether one minute and 40 is consistent with the time that it takes a gentleman to enter a bathroom, relieve himself, wash his hands, and leave. In fact, it is.”"

Lisk dubbed this the Ideal Piss Law. And it makes sense. Depending on how much he had to drink that day, the strength of the flow and how much time he spent getting the light to turn on, that’s a reasonable amount of time to use the men’s room. And if he did go #1, he wasn’t lying. However, we’re ignoring something pretty obvious: What if Jim McNally didn’t wash his hands? How much extra time would he have been left with to deflate footballs? Some.

And this opens up a whole other line of problems. Does that bathroom have a sign that says all employees must wash their hands before returning to work? Which Patriots had to play with balls that McNally touched right after he touched… you know. Cheating is one thing, but personal hygiene is a whole other bag. I don’t know about you, but these thoughts are no relief.