Golf Website Suggests You Charter Private Jets

What’s happening, Rich People? You wealthy Internet content-devour-ers, you! Taking a break from billable hours to expense an extravagant lunch and read some websites? Yeah, I figured you were. And so did Sports Illustrated’s Golf.com. That’s why they published this helpful tip-laden article about why you should rent a private jet the next time you and your other invest-bros are headed anywhere to golf. Take regular, blue-collar golf enthusiast Frank Granito for example.

"Not Frank Granito, who takes a private jet on several golf trips a year. Since signing up with NetJets, Granito has opted for the same annual package, buying 25 to 27 hours of flight time a year, which leaves him with a tab of about $200,000-$225,000, or roughly $9,000 per hour in the air."

J—s f—ing Ch–tmas! Are you sh–ing me? What is this? The jet I mean. For that price you’re not getting the Ted Danson jet. Is this parody? It doesn’t read like parody.

"Take the time a few years back, when he and a few friends got invited to play Augusta. On the day of their big trip, a rogue storm swept through the New York area, sending the major airports into spasms and grounding a slew of commercial flights. Had they been traveling with the masses, Granito and his buddies never would have gotten out. But they did. “We played all the golf we could handle,” Granito says. “And when we were finished, we pushed back the departure so we could squeeze in another 27.”"

I hate when I almost miss my tee time at Augusta, but don’t. Anyway, if this harrowing story hasn’t convinced you that flying private is the way to go, Golf.com has broken down your options for a private jet into four categories: Fractional Ownership, Jet Cards, On-Demand Charter and Outright Ownership.

Honestly, I don’t know which one I’m going to go with! Hopefully, they’re working on a follow-up for those golfers who are afraid to fly. I’ve been looking into my own Madden Cruiser, but just can’t decide whether to lease or fly to John Madden’s and borrow his.

Again, I can’t tell if this is parody or not. The only possible motivation for this article is that somebody didn’t make their nut at the Catalina Wine Mixer. #golfwinsagain

[h/t @ShaneBacon]