NFL Podium Fashion: Andy Dalton's Hair and Andrew Whitworth's Existence

Andrew Whitworth Bengals depression

NFL Podium Fashion: Andy Dalton's Hair and Andrew Whitworth's Existence

NFL

NFL Podium Fashion: Andy Dalton's Hair and Andrew Whitworth's Existence

As we’ve learned throughout the course of this vibrant NFL season, the postgame podium can serve as a player’s best friend or their most sworn enemy. It’s proved to raise the personal brands of already established stars — like RussCam, and Tom — to even higher levels, while sinking others like a Newman cannonball. Oh yes, we’re lookin’ directly at you, Carson Palmer, Big Ben, and Blake Bortles.

By now, the journey has spoken for itself and taught us what we know all long — only to a more ALARMING degree:

Sometimes it works. And sometimes it does NOT. These are their stories.

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Aaron Rodgers

A blue leather jacket to go with an explosive zip-up sweater? Whatever works, I suppose. But it doesn’t work.

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Ben Roethlisberger

Big Ben fat cheeks that allow storage

Finding it difficult to mock Big Ben this week even though he appears to be housing a family of rowdy chipmunks within his robust cheeks. But I guess I just did.

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Kirk Cousins

Kirk Cousins movie usher

Can you look at me — or yourself for that matter — and honestly say you had faith in this storied movie usher? Easy money from a predictably stirring disaster.

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Clay Matthews

Easily one of the most disturbing pube explosions to ever take place on somebody’s face.

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Andy Dalton

Any Dalton hair genius

Andy Dalton may have been forced to take a seat, but his hair downright REFUSED to sit down. What a moment. Seriously, guys, CHILLS.

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Andrew Whitworth

Andrew Whitworth Bengals depression

“Hi Andrew, Tim Ryan here from The Big Lead. So what does it feel like to… oh.”

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Eric Berry outfit

Fun Fact: Eric Berry is color blind. Allegedly. Hopefully.

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Bill O’Brien

Bill O'Brien explains failure

The Texans are a mess-seeking horror show. Cannot imagine being a fan of this team and their propensity for quarterbacks that would likely be No. 2 on the depth chart of numerous high school football programs in Texas.

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Teddy Bridgewater

Teddy Bridgewater has a sad

No playoff win, NO PODIUM. The NFL is one of the harshest businesses in the world.

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Pete Carroll

I gotta be honest here. I never liked Pete Carroll, but that was from a distance. Watch this clip — while ignoring his unfashionable hat — and admire the charisma. Tremendous moment.

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