Melvin Gordon Says San Diego Is Just "On A Break" With The Chargers, He's Dead Wrong

Melvin Gordon claims San Diego and the Chargers are just “on a break” right now and that eventually, the team’s fans in “America’s Finest City” will get back together with their old team. While I appreciate that Gordon wants the relationship to continue, he couldn’t be more wrong. This relationship is over and he can thank his team’s owner, Dean Spanos, for the messy breakup that San Diegans will never get over.

If you want a real relationship metaphor for what happened between San Diego and the Chargers, it’s not Ross and Rachel it’s the following:

Imagine you’re married to a someone for a long time. Sure, you’ve had your ups and downs and disagreements, but you love each other and everyone agrees you belong together. For a while your significant other has been asking for a new house. You agree, you need one, but you haven’t been able to save up enough money for something because the economy has been terrible. Finally, you’ve saved enough to get a new home and you tell your partner you’re ready to start looking. Your spouse says “I want a mansion by the water.” You delicately tell your partner you can’t afford that, but hey, if they want to find a way to make more  money to help pay for it, you’ll certainly discuss it. Well, your significant other doesn’t want to get a job, they want you to just spend more on it.

You continue to tell your spouse you’re willing to invest in a new home, it will be really nice, but it’s just not going to be exactly what they want. Because your spouse can’t get their way, they start flirting with the one person you couldn’t stand in high school. You typically get along with everyone, but this jerk is your nemesis. You can’t stand this person, or his/her bad plastic surgery and fake tan. So in response you redouble your efforts, you say you’ll put the mansion on the beach up for a family vote and if it’s approved, you’ll just have to bite the bullet and pay for it. Well, the family roundly rejects it.

Now you turn to your spouse and say, “Honey, look, I love you and we can have a really nice house, it’s just not going to be what you want.” Instead of listening, you partner sits in the corner and pouts. Then, out of nowhere, they kick you in the crotch, slap you in the face and announce they’ve been cheating with that person you hate and now your spouse is taking everything and moving in with them.

Now, you know that other person doesn’t love your partner. They are going to use your spouse for a few years and dump them for something new. But your partner is so mad about the house they’re willing to throw away everything you’ve built. Oh, and on the way out your spouse takes your dog, the new person slaps your dog around and your ex laughs about it.

Now, you’re that person in that relationship, would you get back together with your ex after taking that kind of abuse? Didn’t think so.