Eddie Lacy Collects $55,000 Bonus For Not Being Fat

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Eddie Lacy, the new Seattle Seahawks running back, weighed in at a svelte 253 pounds today, and thus earned a $55,000 bonus.

Lacy, a star at Alabama who ate his way out of Green Bay, turns 27 next month. He should have a bright NFL future. That is, if he can keep his weight down. So what did Seattle do? They told him to start eating healthy and put down the snacks and we’ll give you millions of dollars.

Lacy passed the first test. But there are several more of these “weigh-ins” before the season begins. There’s only $385,000 on the line.

Imagine being told this: Hey, if you can stop eating and keep a manageable weight for the next nine months, you could get million dollars.