Roundup: Mueller's Grand Jury; ESPN Ocho; Don't Do This During Sex

Washington Post obtains transcripts of Trump’s contentious calls with Mexican and Australian leaders …  Robert Mueller has impaneled a grand jury … You’re never too old to buckle up … Mike Fisher retires … Hey, it’s La La Anthony … Texas man shoots armadillo, bullet ricochets back into his face … Live goats were used to fete Tom Brady’s 40th birthday … What happens if sports leagues decide to cut the cord … The best films of 1977 … Oscar Pistorius hospitalized with chest pains … Dave Bliss hired for some reason … Majority of Harvard’s incoming freshmen class is nonwhite … Susan Rice cleared in unmasking controversy … Al Qaeda releases hostage after nearly six years … ESPN Ocho actually happening … West Virginia governor switches political parties … CEO allows escort to rack up $5.8 million on company credit card … Sweet new hybrid NBA logos … Rutgers jersey reveal likely high point of season … Chris Christie showed good restraint by not dumping his nachos on heckler … Frank Clark threw a punch … Mel Gibson’s Malibu estate reasonably priced at $17.5 million …

We will let this headline speak for itself. Should you seal your penis shut with a Jiftip sticker during sex? [USA Today]

Full police report on the Michigan State sexual assault probe. [Detroit Free Press]

Figuring out what game is playing on television screens in movies and TV shows is important work. [Reddit]

Cody Bellinger is really young, not hip to the pop culture us olds grew up with. [SI]

This writer doesn’t appear to be the biggest Lena Dunham fan. [Barstool Sports]

No money to pay the student-athletes.

Sheryl Crow is still alive.

Everyday heroes, helping people.