Sorry To Tell You This, But You Love Duke Now

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I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you love Duke now, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

It happened Saturday night, when Zion Williamson chose the Blue Devils over America. Williamson, the No. 1 player in the 2018 class, joined a Duke class that already included the Nos. 2 and 3 players, R.J. Barrett and Cameron Reddish, plus Tre Jones, the No. 8 player. This is regarded as the greatest recruiting class in modern college basketball history, a group that will always be mentioned in the same sentence as the Fab Five from Michigan, whether or not their cultural impact matches the Fab Five.

You’ll try to resist this, and it will be easy at first. There will be so many annoying things written and said about this team in October. Before the games even start, we’ll all be discussing the legacy of this group, and you’ll be extremely irritated.

But then the games will start, and Zion Williamson will start dunking …

… and dunking …

… and dunking …

Duke is going to dunk on fools like nobody has ever dunked on fools before, and at some point it will just overwhelm you. You will submit. You will conform.

You will love Duke.

Oh, you’ll pretend not to. You’ll write things on Twitter like, “All Zion Williamson can do is dunk.” People are already doing that.

These are defense mechanisms. Obvious cries for help by people who already know they’re being sucked in. This time next year we’ll all be watching Duke games in incognito mode and dying to tweet about them but scared to admit we’ve been infected too.

But there is no use resisting. You love Duke now. It’s OK.