Don’t know this guy? That’s no surprise. We didn’t either – until, without explanation, he appeared on The Sports Reporters Sunday morning. His name is Marcus Breton. He’s a prominent Hispanic columnist at the Sacramento Bee. Don’t be embarrassed if you don’t know him – the guy doesn’t even have a Wikipedia entry.

So why are we writing about him? Because when Jason Whitlock answered our email questions last week, we got the impression the overweight lova’s days on the show were probably numbered. He also insinuated that Lupica and a producer on the show were pressuring him to join in the “Barry Bonds witch hunt.” So we tuned in Sunday morning, thinking maybe since the Kansas City Chiefs were off, Lupica and Whitlock would kiss and make up. No such luck.

(Quick aside: The show shamelessly opened by talking about the Steelers-Bengals game, which was puzzling to say the least, considering Barry Bonds broke Hank Aaron’s National League home run record Saturday night, and Notre Dame staged an improbable rally to topple Michigan State. For what it’s worth, these were the two lead items on Sportscenter earlier in the morning. Guys, you’re going to have to disguise your shameless NFL plugs better than that.)

Instead, we were treated to Breton’s appearance – we’re assuming it’s his first, though we don’t watch the show on a weekly basis – which had the feel of Tony Kornheiser in the Monday Night Football booth: struggling to get in a word edgewise.

That is, until his parting shot at the end, when he took a massive dump on Bonds:

Trailing Hank Aaron by only 21 career home runs, and with the Giants hosting the 2007 All-Star game, there is simply too much money to be made off Bonds next season from Bay Area fans who don’t care if he did steroids, or think BALCO is a government setup to distract attention from the Iraq war.

Breton closed with some foul imagery of well-fed seagulls circling the ballpark next season and shitting on a Bonds statue. If you TiVo’d the show, Lupica can be seen cackling in the corner like grinning hyena.

Nice to see Breton getting along with Lupica. It’s also nice that they both have something in common: both fell ass-backward into cash by writing books about steroid users who clubbed home runs by the bushel – before anyone was talking about the juice or HGH. Here’s Lupica’s book and here’s one from Breton.

And since Whitlock wouldn’t “step to Lupica’s drum,” it’s nice to see the show found another minority journalist to take his place. Perhaps the next step will be bringing bloggers willing to smear Bonds on the show – we’ll gladly do it – assuming you’ll let us also hammer away at head-in-the-sand journalists who turned a hefty profit off Bonds, McGwire, Sosa, et al when the juiced-up athletes were swatting home runs like never before.

Why doesn’t the show just put out an ad on craigslist: WANTED: Minority Journalist Willing to Trash Barry Bonds on Television. PAY: Negotiable, but perks include a free weekend in New York City and the joy of meeting America’s wealthiest stay-at-home journalists, Mike Lupica and Mitch Albom.