Onion Bag: Real Madrid Is Reconstructing The Death Star
Soccer June 3rd. 2009, 2:00pm
Florentino Perez took on the Real Madrid presidency just a few days ago, but he apparently is not one to dawdle. The architect of the “Galacticos” era is recreating its present day equivalent, beginning with a reported $93 million bid that has been accepted by A.C. Milan for Brazilian star Kaka.
Real Madrid’s bid is significantly less than the $150 million offered by Manchester City in January. The reported offer is five-years $65 million, enough to make him one of the higher paid players in the world, but radically dwarfed by the $48 million per year Manchester City was prepared to pay him.
Chelsea tried to hijack the deal, but was unsuccessful. If anyone doubts where the true loyalties in international soccer rest, Chelsea, A.C. Milan and Real Madrid are all marquee Adidas clubs.
Kaka won’t be the only new face balling at the Bernabeu. Perez is planning a $22 million offer for Liverpool’s Xabi Alonso, though the most famous Basque soccer player in the world wearing the Royalist shirt might ruffle the feathers of some unsavory folks. Rafa Benitez should fight to keep him in red as well, now that Gareth Barry has gone to Manchester City.
Perez will be after Franck Ribery from Bayern Munich.
He also pledged to buy some Spaniards this time - Sergio Ramos was the only one who arrived during his last tenure - which could see the two Davids, Villa and Silva, arriving from cash-strapped Valencia.
Then, merely for shits, giggles and a bit of publicity, he will look to reigning World Player of the Year, Cristiano Ronaldo.
All tallied, Real Madrid could spend over $400 million on players this summer, and still lose to Barcelona.
33 Responses to “Onion Bag: Real Madrid Is Reconstructing The Death Star”
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June 3rd, 2009 at 2:04 pm
This story was bound to get bit in the ass sooner or later
I won’t believe any of it til the pen hits the paper.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:06 pm
Spot on!
The ultimate coup for Real Madrid.
As a Barca fan I would love to say spot on to that again, but then I am going to take a wait and see, especially if they get Ribery and then the floodgates open for other fine players attracted to play more to Real Madrid.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:10 pm
I’m not going to read the post because I don’t know anything about soccer. But I am going to say that the headlines is outstanding.
+1 Ty
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:16 pm
Attention Mrejr Brock! Check out Souvenirs example! I think baseball sucks royal ass, but hey I don’t go on there and rip on it unless of course it is some Yankees homer sometimes, because we have to hear too much about them on ESPN already.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:23 pm
I doubt Kaka’ ends up at Chelski. Even if Roman is willing to throw around his rubles and has Ancelotti ready to welcome him, Kaka’ is going to stay at Milan or go to Madrid.
As for Perez, can’t wait for this to all end up badly in 3 years.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Ah like Duffy, another Liverpool hater spotted? Who is your EPL team Fredo if not Chelsea? Don’t tell me Arsenal like Duffy too!
Ultimately I pull for Udinese, then Barca, then Lazio, then Liverpool, then Celtic, then Hamburg.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Go Gunners!
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:29 pm
Ah never mind Fredo mixing things up too much multi-taking again. Who is your team in the EPL or otherwise anyway?
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:31 pm
Time for a report on Clown since he provided that comment then …with regard to the Crown Title of More Interesting Than The Most Interesting Man. Down with the Gunners!
4)
Clown
He does not always compete, but when he does prefers to compete for the Crown Title of The Least Interesting Most Interesting Man.
He considers all people as a necessary evil for his amusement at their full and often willing expense. Bitch.
He once took off his make-up and agreed with someone just to see how it would feel. He did not like it.
Now he has returned to even more embittered clown make-up as evidenced in these recent file photos: http://www.scaryornot.com/ Or this one: http://www.scaryornot.com/
He maintains the world’s largest collection of clown porn amidst a vast 8mm porn archive in the world’s largest basement playhouse dungeon walled sturdily by doubled cheap fake wood paneling in Dallas, where of course everything is bigger.
He is a master of disguise, even impersonating successfully the elusive Paolo on multiple occasions.
He enjoys calling 911 from random cell phones at the circus — in a disguised clown voice like often like that of Krusty, his mentor and eternal inspiration.
He just might be already The Least Interesting Most Interesting Man, but somehow he is still in this competition and hates that too.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:35 pm
Damn it Ty! After all these Onion Bag posts, I’ve decided to follow soccer. Since I just watched Green Street Hooligans, I’ve decided that West Ham is my team. What can you tell me about them?
/Go Hammers!!
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:35 pm
I don’t see him going to Chelsea either. Milan aren’t going to push him out the door. Money isn’t his primary motivation. He turned down $48 million per year from Many City. Keep in mind he also has a 10% of the transfer fee clause in his contract. So he would have made an additional $15 million from Man City, just for signing the check.
Chelsea throw around money, but they don’t have the prestige or the brand of other big clubs. With Kaka you have to consider him as a franchise unto himself and a multi-faceted entity.
The only clubs in the world who he could really leave for in terms of gravitas are Real Madrid, Manchester United and Barcelona. Barcelona don’t need him. Man U can’t afford him.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:38 pm
@Paolo: Cause we’re Arseeenaaaalllll….AAAAARRRRSEEEENNNAAALLLL FC!
And I’m not a Liverpool hater. I just find it funny that their fans were all salivating over Gareth Barry and dumping Xabi Alonso over the side last year. Now, since Barry’s gone to Man City, he’s trash and Alonso is the world-class midfielder.
Oh and the Perez comment is directed at the Galacticos. Because building superstar teams always works great! (See: 2004 Lakers, 2003-2005 Madrid).
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:39 pm
I like the Pirlo move for Chelsea, Ballack needs to be moved, Pirlo should work well with Lampard and Essien.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:43 pm
all right dumb novice soccer questions:
How do teams afford these transfer fees? Why do teams have to pay them? Can’t teams just wait until a player is not under contract? How is this legal? Thanks.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:49 pm
You can wait till a player is not under contract as long as the player is over 23. Transfers of the type discussed above are for players under contract, think of it as trade for cash instead of other players.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:49 pm
@Fredo: The only person throwing Alonso overboard was Rafa. The fans wanted to keep him. See: http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2009/jun/02/xabi-alonso-liverpool-transfer-gareth-barry
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:50 pm
/fixed
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:52 pm
The system is designed to compensate the smaller clubs for the investment in training the players that the larger clubs desire. Since the clubs are all part of the same promotion and relegation system a large transfer fee from a big club can allow a small team to invest in better facilities and players to hopefully win the league they are in and move up to bigger things.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Where? Off the team or ? Why can’t they all be on the same pitch at the same time, or they don’t play the 4-4-2? Heck why not a 3-5-2 with Essien in there? Or too much talent getting in the way of itself? Or is it the age thing perhaps with Ballack at 33 with first signs of slowing down? (asking openly all questions)
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Great little post by Rick Reilly (from his page on ESPN)
My mom used to say, “What you do comes back to you.” She would’ve loved the final of the UEFA Champions League. Manchester United — the team with the giant AIG across its jerseys — got beat by FC Barcelona, the team with the UNICEF logo across its, 2-0. How cool is that? Barcelona does it all backwards. It blew off a jersey sponsorship deal worth tens of millions, like the best UEFA teams sign, and instead decided to donate $2 million a year to UNICEF for the privilege of wearing its name. And Barcelona will do it for two more seasons. Manchester, meanwhile, is wearing the logo of one of the world’s greediest — and most ruinous — corporations in history. Karma. Who says you can’t love soccer?
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:56 pm
As Clown points out correctly, the Nike issue might also play a role in where Ribery ends up moving to as well.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Well, it doesn’t look like Ballack will be moved this year as he is signing an one-year extension.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Ballack needs to be moved
Since he has arrived I can’t stop thinking he and Lampard can’t both be effective together. Ballack is the heart of the German midfield and he either can’t play that role with Chelsea or chooses not to be that guy, the best play out of Ballack has always been when Lampard was off the field.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Ballack just seems better suited to play whatever position he plays for mother Germany. He never looks dynamic for Chelsea, but for Germany he looks dominant. Have him go back to Bayern–though this will never happen.
June 3rd, 2009 at 3:09 pm
Just as a sidenote, I don’t know how big of a deal it is whether a team is a nike or adidas team. there are stars that are on teams sponsored by a rival shoe company. see e.g. Torres, Messi, Henry.
June 3rd, 2009 at 3:14 pm
As a Newcastle fan, I’d like to make the following offer to Real Madrid: Michael Owens’ bloated corpse for thirty cents on the dollar. We’ll throw in owner Mike Ashley and Dennis Wise at no extra cost.
The ‘Barcodes’ need as much cash as they can get while listing in The Championship.
June 3rd, 2009 at 3:16 pm
randy lerner sucks.
that is all.
June 3rd, 2009 at 3:45 pm
Monday is the day given for Milan to reveal the Kaka solution.
I wonder if Kaka could survive the violence of the epl. The space in serieA vaporizes against epl teams.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:01 pm
West Ham
Culturally - Sort of capture it in the film. East London. Reputation for being rough, working class. Large Fan Base. Reputation for hooliganism.
Tradition - Have been around forever. Played at Upton Park since 1904. Not overly successful. Haven’t finished above third in the top league ever. Have won the FA Cup three times, but not since 1980.
They are really famous for their academy system. Rio Ferdinand, Frank Lampard, Joe Cole and Michael Carrick all started there before being sold.
Right now they are a solid mid-table Premier League team. Gianfranco Zola was a legendary player for Chelsea in the 1990’s, now West Ham’s manager and has done decently.
Though, they are in a lot of financial trouble, as their Icelandic owner went bankrupt.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:04 pm
None of those three are on Kaka’s level in terms of commercial power. He’s on a similar level with Beckham where it does become an issue.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:07 pm
That’s one reason he’s not going to Chelsea.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:09 pm
Henry was in those Gillette ads with Tiger and Federer. I can’t think of another European based player appearing on US broadcast network commercials - thats some commercial power.
June 3rd, 2009 at 4:25 pm
If Kaka becomes a Chelski player I’m pretty sure I’ll punch someone in the face. The only thing worse than a bandwagon ManUre fan is a bandwagon Chelsea fan. GO YIDS!