NFL List Week: Fraud Index
NFL July 2nd. 2009, 3:10pm
1. Kansas City Chiefs - How can a team coming off a 2-14 season be considered fraudulent? EASILY! A big name QB acquisition is a good start. Matt Cassel should find out quickly that being out of the Belichick/Moss/Welker womb isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. (He was traded? Trivial!) I’m still pulling for him to pull some quality tail though.
2. Minnesota Vikings - Favrey favrey favre favre. Look at his stats from last season. Nobody really believes he’s going to get the Vikings over the hump, right? Right? And if Favre doesn’t un-retire again, Sage Rosenfels is the QB. (lolz)
3. New York Jets - I’m still trying to figure out if their rookie QB is a more likely candidate for Rookie of the Year or a future episode of Is She Really Going Out With Him?
4. Seattle Seahawks - Sure they got a name free agent and a stud linebacker in the draft, but this is the NFC West. Go hard or go home.
5. Detroit Lions - I know they don’t get much coverage around here so I figured I’d call them frauds. It’s a statewide epidemic. Will they improve from an NFL record 0-16? Probably. Does that mean they’re getting better. I hope not. As long as Detroit struggles, the rest of America seems that much better by comparison.
6. Carolina Panthers - Did I ever tell you how much money Jake Delhomme lost me last year? I don’t remember exactly, but it was well into the triple-digits. How do you throw five interceptions!? FRAUD!!!
Honorable Mention: The rest of the league - Yep. You heard it here first. Less than 2 teams will win the Super Bowl this year. That’s a lot of fraud.
29 Responses to “NFL List Week: Fraud Index”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:14 pm
My top two would be Atlanta and Arizona.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:17 pm
so true, so true.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:21 pm
whatever…cleveland has…
/wrong site.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:24 pm
What a bunch of losery hackfrauds!
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:26 pm
Bashing the Jets?
That’s a bannin’.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:26 pm
Of all the USC quarterbacks to choose from, he’s the fraud?
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:29 pm
Gotta put Baltimore on there minus Rex Ryan. I don’t see that team being an elite AFC squad again this year.
Totally agree with KC at #1.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:31 pm
where are the Titans?
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Somebody’s gonna finish 2nd in that division. If not the Chiefs, who?
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:34 pm
Was walking through the store and saw a Cassell jersey. Had to do a double-take and kind of snickered to myself.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:35 pm
raiders.
don’t laugh.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:37 pm
Fuck, Scuderi signed with the Kings
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:39 pm
MOTHERFUCKER!!!
/who dat is?
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:43 pm
dolphins and falcons should be on that list. they wont do shit this year.
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Is that the same as this?
/mistake by the lake’d
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Fuck, Scuderi signed with the Kings
MOTHERFUCKER!!!
/who dat is?
Tom Hank’s dress wearing co-star in Bosom Buddies, or Bob Newhart’s yuppie friend in the Newhart show where he lived in Vermont
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:53 pm
“Now, I don’t want them to gain another yard. You blitz, all night! If they cross the line of scrimmage, I’ma take every last one of ya out. You make sure…they remember, FOREVER, the night they played the Titans!”
/jmorris
//Disney’d
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:55 pm
The Dolphins could be one of those teams that could get better and not make the playoffs
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:00 pm
This is a joke, right? You can’t call SEA out for a fraud in an entire division that is fraudulent.
Explain your reasoning, please.
/took the bait
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:03 pm
I don’t think the fans are fooled anymore. At least not the smart ones. Too many years of “This top draft pick” and “this is the year” eventually wears on you when the team doesn’t even come close to competativeness.
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:07 pm
there was a surprise element to that team last year….that is now gone
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:13 pm
Didn’t they only make the playoffs last year because Lovie Smith is an idiot?
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:20 pm
yeah what clown said
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Contract the Jets. They haven’t won anything in years.
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:55 pm
If the Pirates had a few more cagey scenesters, ala the Jets, their record wouldn’t matter. They’d be relevant! Unfortunately, I think they just traded the best candidate they had for an off the field hat wearing post.
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:57 pm
Didn’t they make the playoffs last year because Mike Smith is a genius?
Yes.
Suprise element in football? Right, I bet no one even watched film or game-planned on them until this offseason.
July 2nd, 2009 at 6:31 pm
Sorry, I’m laughing. Can’t help it.
July 2nd, 2009 at 6:58 pm
Yessss thanks for mentioning my new favorite show
July 4th, 2009 at 2:40 am
REAALLY sorry I’m missed this. I’ll answer anyway..
two reasons:
3. Falcons never made the playoffs in back-to-back seasons
d. Falcons suck