Rockies 6, Padres 1: Jason Marquis is the majors’ first 12-game winner and the king of Jersey Shore necklaces. This is usually the type of season a guy like Marquis has that allows him to earn an absurd deal with a team like the Rockies where he then comes crashing back to reality. I can’t figure it out.

Rays 4, Royals 3: Pat Burrell was 0-for-4 with four strikeouts. He carried a man-purse to the plate for his third at-bat, and used a mini pool stick for his last at-bat.

Cards 2, D-Backs 1: Joel Piñeiro is a magician and should really be 17-0 instead of 8-9.

Braves 7, Mets 1: Mets starter Fernando Nieve left in the second inning after he was viciously attacked by a lion at first base. Javy Vázquez went seven and allowed one run on six hits.

Blue Jays 3, Red Sox 1: Roy Halladay dominated Boston on route to his fourth complete game of the year. The trade deadline is a week from Friday. Expect 637 Halladay updates on MLBTradeRumors between now and then.

Phils 5, Marlins 0: J.A. Happ improved to 7-0 after going seven scoreless innings and allowing just five hits. In his last five starts, he’s gone at least seven innings.

Yanks 2, Tigers 1: The Yankees swept the Tigers behind impressive back-to-back one-run wins over Justin Verlander and Edwin Jackson. With that said, expect Baltimore youngster David Hernández to dominate them tonight. Oh, and the fist pump was back in full form yesterday.

Rangers 5, Twins 3: Ian Kinsler went deep twice, including a two-run walk-off shot in the bottom of the 12th. Still, he’s batting just .251 versus the .319 average he finished with in ‘08.

Giants 4, Pirates 3: Matt Cain improved to 11-2, has won nine of his last 10 decisions and, sadly, will never experience the joy of growing a beard.

Dodgers 4, Astros 3: LaTroy Hawkins hadn’t lost a game in over a month, it was bound to happen.

Angels 1, A’s 0: Brett Anderson, the living legend who many people on this site poured their heart out for when he shut down the Sox at Fenway, had a perfect game into the seventh before Bobby Abreu broke things up with a two-out single. Abreu spoiled things again with a homer in the top of the 10th.

Scary moment for San Diego’s Edgar Gonzalez, who was drilled in the ear hole of his helmet by a Jason Hammel fastball: