mets-naked-gunCards 12, Mets 7: This was a brutal loss for the Mets on many levels. First, K-Rod, who rarely gets these opportunities, blows a two-run lead in the ninth, a rally in which the left-for-dead Julio Lugo was prominently involved. Then, in the 10th, Sean Green hits Mark DeRosa with the bases loaded to bring in the go-ahead run, followed by Albert Pujols dropping the big elbow with a grand slam. But that wasn’t it. Luis Castillo, who’s been the Mets hottest hitter of late, fell down the dugout steps and sprained his ankle. Amazing. I’m convinced the Mets are secretly filming a movie with Leslie Nielsen. That’s the only conclusion to be drawn at this point. Back to Pujols though, these are his numbers with the bases loaded in 2009: 9 AB, 7 H, 5 HR, 24 RBI. Disgusting. That’s even good for a video game.

prince-fielderDodgers 17, Brewers 4: As you know, Prince Fielder charged down the home dugout steps after the game to get to the Dodgers locker room so he could pretend to fight while being held back by security and teammates. What a raging badasss! Does anyone understand what he was doing? The Brewers hit Manny in the seventh, so L.A. hit their guy in the middle of the thigh, big deal. That’s how it works, fatty. Anyway, six different Dodgers drove in at least two runs and Joe Torre left after the sixth inning.

D-Backs 6, Pirates 0: Yusmeiro Petit became the 432nd pitcher this year to almost throw a no-hitter. It was broken up in the eighth inning by Ronny Cedeño. The Pirates failed to score, I smell a fan revolt.

Orioles 8, Tigers 2: The pennant race is obviously too much pressure for Jarrod Washburn. He gave up six runs in 5 1/3. He had given up a run or less in his previous five starts before joining the intense AL Central.

White Sox 5, Angels 4: Scott Podsednik came through with his third game-ending hit of the season. This guy was on Colorado last year and then waived? Had no idea he was such a mess. And Gordon Beckham has been tearing it up ever since I made fun of him. It never fails.

jamiemoyer2001upperdeckvintage66autoRockies 8, Phils 3: Old man Moyer got rocked. Cliff Lee makes his Philly debut on Friday.

Rays 4, Red Sox 2: Evan Longoria, who struck out four times, won it in the 13th with a walk-off two-run shot, his second homer of the night and seventh overall against Boston this season. Jon Lester pitched well but only made it through six because his pitch count was already at 110.

Yanks 5, Blue Jays 3: For the second time this year, the Yankees hit three home runs off Roy Halladay. Normally, they look as baffled against him as they used to against Burnett. It was closer than it should have been after a shaky appearance by Phil Hughes, who’s given up four hits and three runs in his last 3 2/3 innings.

Bet this guy sucked at tee ball: