PM Roundup: One Day Mirage
Baseball, College Basketball, Fantasy Sports, Golf, NFL August 27th. 2009, 3:00pm
Yeah, it’s that time of year again where I dump some of the many links that people still send to me. It’s like a bunch of one-liners for the price of one.
For old time’s sake, I thought I’d run a picture of Elisha Cuthbert. I got sucked into The Girl Next Door the other night for the 100th time and it’s no wonder why. (Aside from the star-making turn of Emile Hirsch as Matthew Kidman.)
Finally, someone stands up for Kendry Morales as an MVP candidate. (Stupid Sports Blog)
11 touchdown vultures! Get out of here you damn birds! (The Hazean)
This guy has almost seen all the football stadiums. (Quest For 31)
A field goal hit a kid in the head. (Total Pro Sports)
If you build the most expensive golf course evar and the top pros don’t like it… Well, that sucks for you. (Golf World)
A surfing tip. Yeah, that’s what it is. (Nugable)
10 horrible female drives. TBL sent this in. I swear. (Hail Mary Jane - Site semi-NFSW)
Pedro sucks and Jamie Moyer was OK. (Kallas Remarks)
Rick Pitino has important things to say. (Sparty & Friends)
Mustache trivia. (SimonOnSports)
Patrick Kane pleaded to a lesser charge. (Yahoo!)
Women be coachin’ futbol. (Unprofessional Foul)
LOLMets. Kind of like kicking a blind kid at this point. (Behind the Moat)
Apparently, this song is the dopest shit. Drake featuring Lil Wayne, Kanye, and Em. Listen quick before its gone. (YouTube)
10 things to do at Wrigley when you’re not watching the game. Yelling racial epitaphs epithets at Milton Bradley just missed the cut. (Mouthpiece)
Finally, for no particular reason.
180 Responses to “PM Roundup: One Day Mirage”
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August 27th, 2009 at 3:01 pm
well i think it has something to deal with her bending over and asking the guy if she wants to fuck him
August 27th, 2009 at 3:02 pm
the other way around of course
August 27th, 2009 at 3:03 pm
(wipes eyes) It’s gotta be a mirage right? I’ve been wandering through this desert looking for the PM round up for months.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
From previous thread…felt it was a good story that needed to be seen.
I have a funny story that involves Chipwiches and orgasms…I suppose I’ll tag this properly.
tj:
We had a guy on floor my freshman year at Iowa that would bring back fat chicks when he was in a slump and completely embarrass them. He would call us before he was bringing her back and make sure we were awake. During sex, it could be heard clear as day because he would also make the girls yell, “WHO’S MOM MAKES THE BEST COOKIES? WHO’S MOM MAKES THE BEST COOKIES?”
True story. I miss college.
end tj
/standing ovation for CRM on the PM Roundup
August 27th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
PM Roundup and Fat Girl stories???
/Heaven
August 27th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
What the hell is this? Where am I?
August 27th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
At first I was wiping mine because of my overwhelming happiness seeing the PM Roundup. The tears quickly squirted because I was laughing so hard at Souvenir City’s fat girl story.
This is awesome.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
that the lebron song?
August 27th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Drake sucks.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
August 27th, 2009 at 3:14 pm
I didnt go to school with you.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:14 pm
i couldn;t get it up for a fat girl
August 27th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
Yeah, pretty dope shit.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
Kanye: Grammy Family. dope shit
August 27th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
In my mind, Elisha Cuthbert will always be wearing pink.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
i like it when people combine 2 movies
August 27th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
sure you could…problem’s keeping it up. much like gravity, heavy chicks make keeping it up quite the conundrum.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
This will probably be construed as racist, but… I did live in the athlete dorm. Cornerback Jovon Johnson lived right across the hall from me and there was a TRAIN of hot white girls that would be outside his door at like 2 a.m. My friends and I would just pick up his scraps.
It was great.
/nostalgic air’d
August 27th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
We had a guy on floor my freshman year at Iowa that would bring back fat chicks when he was in a slump and completely embarrass them.
Nothin wrong with a slump buster. When you eiffel tower a fat chick, now that’s a party
August 27th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
I call BS on that song being “the dopest shit.” Rap hasn’t been good in at least 10 years.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
HUZZAH! If I had known I would have sent this in.
Can’t say I endorse the visual, but I do enjoy the sentiment.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
Good lord sc that is phenomenal
August 27th, 2009 at 3:21 pm
rap is crap! rap is crap!
August 27th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
Most of what I heard from him isn’t very good. I like that song b/c Drake has a ton of help in it. Em, Kanye and Birdman Jr. are pretty good.
It’s not the dopest, but it’s dope. Rap is changed. OGs like Snoop, Dre and dead Gs like Tupac and Biggie aren’t it anymore. I’m not trying to impose any taste on you, but I’m just sayin.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
/resisting urge to fix bsanders comment to say rap hasn’t been good ever…must stay strong…must hold out
August 27th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
The fat chick story I mean. You shouldn’t be relegated to scraps.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
It’s funny because it’s true
August 27th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
“It’s like this beautiful birthday cake you bring into the room and slice into pieces, everyone takes a bite and realizes there’s [bleep] inside,” as one player put it
PGA Tour golfers are the most spoiled pussies in the world
August 27th, 2009 at 3:25 pm
I must admit that I’m in a slump right now. (We all go through it, so fuck off). But not to the fat chick point yet… well… maybe. Fuck.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:25 pm
no way.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
i got it, spence. RAP FUCKING SUCKS.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
I’m a big Pac fan and I’ve never heard this track on any of his underground shit. I know people can fuck with recordings but this is still some wild shit. Listen to some of the lyrics. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wn1pfIi6zH8
/Pac lives
//Not really
August 27th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
sure you could…problem’s keeping it up. much like gravity, heavy chicks make keeping it up quite the conundrum.
Which is why they get the best sex. Any attractive woman get’s Richard Pryor’s four minutes of serious fucking. You can fuck a fat girl for days. Keeping yourself attractive is counterproductive to your vagina’s ladies.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
Well, shit my britches. Don’t you love a good backside CRM?
/replaces monocle with magnifying glass.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Plus your usually drunk while your doing it. The stars are all aligned for them.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:33 pm
OK, I’ve heard this a million times. “Fat girls give the best head” or “fat girls fuck the best” because they’re fat and need the attention or whatever. Is this true? Does this really work? I’ve never fucked a fat girl (how do you define fat?) so I don’t know. I’m serious on this. Help a brother out.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:35 pm
those breasts up there are damn near perfect, yes?
and no i could not get it up, so keeping it up is not an issue. i’d rather stay with the hand than a girl i wouldn;t normallly bang. whole lotta rosie is for the aussies
August 27th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
The former sure… the latter… meh. Also depends what you call fat. Never been over a 160. I’m 6′5″ 185 too. Typically, in my experience, they just let you do whatever you want.
JPQ and I have discussed this before but… I’m all about having a little extra cushion as opposed to the “there’s-a-chance-I-might-break-you” look.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
ndub, just stop at curiosity. go watch some fat porn, and see what you think. if ole jimmy so much as twitches, give it a go and get to the local wal-mart
August 27th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
well yeah, SC, too skinny is just as off-putting
August 27th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
I’ve always operated under the assumption that any girl who wears underwear bigger than yours is fat.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
Fat chicks give toe curling head.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
Wow. Epithets would be one thing, but yelling racial headstone inscriptions is a way over the line.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
It’s his blog, obviously, and he can do what he pleases — but has TBL ever given a real reason for eliminating the PM Roundup? Between the myriad 1-liners, worthless soccer posts (no offense, Duffy) and stupid videos, you think he has enough time/space to keep the PMR a daily thing.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:42 pm
Ive fucked a gang of Fat bitches. Its fun.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:42 pm
fat = whatever point you look at a female and think, “hmm…she should mix in a salad.”
could be anywhere from 150 lbs on up. it’s all relative. there’s no stone-cold definition of fat.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
All this fat bitch talk is making me want to be back in college and single.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
i would love the return of the PM Roundup for football season.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
This slayed me.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
I was banging a fat girl in college once when I was completely hammered and although I was able to get it up, I couldn’t finish. I finally got bored and rolled off her. I pretty much destroyed the small amount of self esteem she had in the first place.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
who hasn’t porked a heffer? NDub, go for it! go for it man!
August 27th, 2009 at 3:47 pm
You just pretend you finished. They can’t see down there anyway.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Epithets would be one thing, but yelling racial headstone inscriptions is a way over the line
Ha!
but has TBL ever given a real reason for eliminating the PM Roundup? Between the myriad 1-liners, worthless soccer posts (no offense, Duffy) and stupid videos, you think he has enough time/space to keep the PMR a daily thing.
CRM put them together. I demand they come back.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:49 pm
If you pull her pants down and her ass is still im them, then she’s to fat to fuck…..other than that it’s fair game.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:50 pm
See, I’d think a chick over 150 is pushing it. I’m not picky either. Spencer’s analysis is pretty damn good. Vezina’s is top notch as well.
Is this true?
And if I see one of these salad-needers, perhaps I should spit some game. Does it take much game or are they pretty easy because they’re lonely or lack self-esteem?
August 27th, 2009 at 3:51 pm
buy em some wings.
and 150, again, isn’t a hard and fast rule. i dated a chick on the volleyball team at my college who was 5′11″ 155 but was cut dry. if she was fat, then i dunno what’s skinny.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:52 pm
Actually, she started giving me head. I looked down at her and said, “dont bother”. In hindsight, I probably could have been a little more tactful.
August 27th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
I looked down at her and said, “dont bother”. In hindsight, I probably could have been a little more tactful.
Ding Ding Ding! Winner!!
August 27th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Anyone see this?
http://blogs.tampabay.com/juice/2009/08/american-pie-actor-jason-biggs-attacked-by-gibraltar-monkeys.html
August 27th, 2009 at 4:00 pm
In my experience with the heavier side the great part is that they approach sex differently. Good looking girls seems to want to be pleased, fat girls want to get railed, which they find pleasing.
Fucking a good looking girl is like going to a basketball try out, you have the pressure to do well, it is fun either way, but it is a little bit of work. Fucking a fat girl is like playing a pick up game with your friends, its fun, and you get to do what you want.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
The AM and almost extinct PM Roundups are the only reason I visit this site anymore.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:05 pm
Fuck it. If I’m wasted this weekend at Ball State and the opportunity is there I’m going to seize the day. If anything I can say I porked a big’un.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:06 pm
@Mikenyc - the reason given once was “to change it up”
Well done CRM, as always
August 27th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
And I can tell all of you about it. What a fruitful discussion.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:09 pm
That’s hilarious. He looks to have packed on some lbs since playing Jim, the precumming teenager in one of the funniest movies EVAR.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
LOL epitaphs
August 27th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
If I’m wasted this weekend at Ball State and the opportunity is there I’m going to seize the day.
don’t do it at Michigan State. The car will smell for months
/been there’d, done that’d
August 27th, 2009 at 4:14 pm
Someone please bronze this on to a plaque and put it in my parlour.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:14 pm
Have a blast but just make sure you wrap it up. Otherwise your funny story about going hoggin’ will haunt your ass forever.
/just here to help
August 27th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
one of my buddies taught me a caliper trick on fat asses. You put your thimbs together, tip to tip. the rest of your fingers are in a fist. Pinkines are pointing foorward. This should form a square facing away from you. Then, using the pinkies as a pivot, roll the thumbs away from each other. If the ass doesn’t fit between the ends of the thumbs, too fat. use it Ndub, and Godfeed to you
August 27th, 2009 at 4:18 pm
hoggin’s overrated.
only 90 lb. asian girls are attractive.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
You offend me, good sir.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:21 pm
thumbs, pinkies, forward
August 27th, 2009 at 4:22 pm
If anything I can say I porked a big’un.
that’s the spirit
August 27th, 2009 at 4:22 pm
go for a 3-way with two hogs, it’ll be like one trough during feeding time
August 27th, 2009 at 4:25 pm
Have a blast but just make sure you wrap it up. Otherwise your funny story about going hoggin’ will haunt your ass forever.
no shit, cuz dirty ass mofo’s do dirty ass fat chicks. I you’re willing to bang a big broad, you’ll bang anything.
/cue tips in the pisser = no fun
August 27th, 2009 at 4:25 pm
ive been spending the last five minutes trying to figure this last part out. im either dumb as fuck or……..
August 27th, 2009 at 4:27 pm
I WILL use that.
I can’t wait to report back to you guys.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Wait. You’re right. Does not compute. @Vezina - Please re-explain.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
don’t do it at Michigan State. The car will smell for months
/been there’d, done that’d
You offend me, good sir.
sorry, but it’s the truth. I won’t go into many details, but it involved my roommate and a large girl w/ questionable hygiene, a 5 hour ride thhrough Michigan and Induiana in January with the windows down, and a “Dear John” letter we had a girl write and send to my roommate postmarked from East Lansing telling him he was gonna be a Daddy about 6 weeks later.
He almost killed himself before we told him the letter was a prank
August 27th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
Basically put your hands out, palm down, and make the “hang loose” sign, and put your thumbs together tip to tip. Then, turn your hands so that your palms are facing up, by rotating your thumbs away from each other. There you have your caliper.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Did I ever tell you guys my story about my encounter with an Asian?
August 27th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Perhaps a diagram or a youtube link would be helpful.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:35 pm
Basically put your hands out, palm down, and make the “hang loose” sign, and put your thumbs together tip to tip. Then, turn your hands so that your palms are facing up, by rotating your thumbs away from each other. There you have your caliper.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
anyone see shaq vs misty may and the other volleyball chick? i doubt misty mays ass could fit between my thumbs. shes gained some weight!
August 27th, 2009 at 4:37 pm
make a big ass field goal posts with your pinkies being the parts that go up.
there you go…
August 27th, 2009 at 4:37 pm
Basically put your hands out, palm down, and make the “hang loose” sign, and put your thumbs together tip to tip. Then, turn your hands so that your palms are facing up, by rotating your thumbs away from each other.
Cheney ordered the CIA to do something like this!
/Olbermann’d
August 27th, 2009 at 4:38 pm
I’m retarded. I still don’t get it. I got the hang loose, thumbs together thing. But this whole rotation is fucking me up.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:38 pm
id fuck misty may and keri walsh to hell and back…so hot.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
Do tell.
/chin resting on hands
August 27th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
at the end you should be touching pinkies and the thumbs make a goal post.
/total opposite of spencer
August 27th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
I’m going to have to assume that said large girl was actually visiting her super skinny and cute friends in East Lansing from Ann Arbor. That’s just how it works.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:42 pm
No, please do.
It was donk levels during Beijing. Now that she had a kid and she’s sort of retired, I can only imagine it’s more swoll.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:43 pm
make a big ass field goal posts with your pinkies being the parts that go up.
wow spence that was easy, i’ve been sittin here like a shithead doing my best attempt at fuckin sign language. That’s not a very big ass, i’ve thrown my one eye mayo slinger in ass bigger than that on several occasions
August 27th, 2009 at 4:43 pm
It’ll help if you put your hands on something. Make the square, and then put your pinkies on a desktop or something. Keep them in place and then rotate your thumbs outward. You should end up in a double-Spiderman pose.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:44 pm
but it involved my roommate and a large girl w/ questionable hygiene
I’m going to have to assume that said large girl was actually visiting her super skinny and cute friends in East Lansing from Ann Arbor. That’s just how it works.
sorry, the skinny one was in the kitchen blowing 3 dudes at once
/again, true’d
August 27th, 2009 at 4:44 pm
Well, shit, it would’ve been made easier if that’s all it said instead of this rotation and hang loose and other stuff. I shouldn’t complain, though, as this is helpful.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
You either have so small hands or low standards. That is a Gigantic ass… maybe my hands are bigger than yours. There is no reason to chase truly fat girls when you can chase chubby girls with equal success rates and less danger of damage to your furniture or body. Thank GOD that the Media promotes this super skinny self image so there are well cushioned but still decently attractive women with low self esteem. I am a bad person.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:46 pm
Pulled- I posted this yesterday.
http://majorleaguejerk.com/2009/08/26/buck-showalter-hates-baseball/#comment-59937
August 27th, 2009 at 4:46 pm
Indubitably. Well, not Walsh as much. I think she would look kind of mutated up-close (she’s like 6′4″). And, too skinny.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:46 pm
thats messed up jpq hope he got you back
August 27th, 2009 at 4:48 pm
I’ve only met one girl from East Lansing but she was one of the 3 hottest chicks I’ve ever interacted with in my life. Therefore, East Lansing has super hot chicks.
/small sampled
August 27th, 2009 at 4:49 pm
HAHAHAHAHA!
Just got a stink eye from a co-worker on that one. I’m laughing my ass off.
I think I got this shit figured out. And if it’s that way then that’s one big ass. But if your pinkies are touching after the rotation then you’ve got a fine ass with some donkage.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
This whole thing is killing me. I can’t possibly imagine a better way to kill the last hour of the workday than by trying to figure out a good standard measurement for determining if a fat chick’s too fat.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
That sounds about right.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
Yes, but just make sure it’s a kind of “W” shape you’re left with. If the pinkies are connecting in a straight line, you’re going to have to hang out at a lot of middle schools.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
thats messed up jpq hope he got you back
even though I was his roommate, two other guys sent the letter and didn’t tell me until after it was on it’s way. I lived with him for 2.5 years and while we always got each other, this was BAD.
It was funny at first, but after a couple hours, everybody left the room and I saw he was falling off the rails (6 weeks before graduation), I told him I had found out the day before and let him in on it. Funny thing is, the guy that came up w/ the idea is now brothers-in-law w/ my roommate.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:54 pm
Yeah, I got an ass that’s like bigger than a black pornstar’s.
I like cushion. In fact, I love it. But I’m talking with a small waist.
I’ll go for a fatty but she’ll be a chubby. Ya dig? And I’ll still report back.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:55 pm
HOLY SHIT THAT IS THE FUNNIEST THING I’VE EVER READ EVAR.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:56 pm
Jumanji- Honest does not equal bad.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
I’ve read this story like five times in a few minutes and I laugh harder every time. The part where you said one of your fats woke you up is what gets me.
August 27th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
Bo, i like how you party. Speaking of goin on forever, My buddy gave me these warm sensation condoms and said they were awsome and i’d love them. (I told him that was impossible because condoms suck) well i later found out this was a joke. i got this little summer flinger with his hottie named Ginger, was cocktail waitress at a local strip joint, and later found out she was moving up in employment. Well these Trojan’s warm sensation condoms numbed my knob up sooo fuckin bad that i couldn’t get off. It really boosted myself esteem cuz i nailed on my boat “The Stabbin Kabin” and fuckin rocked her world. It was a bummer because i got a stellar reputation after that cuz she told all her friends i was a stud but have yet to repeat that performance again til this day……actually not even close. I asked my buddy about the damn condoms he gave me and all he did was laugh his ass off…..asshole
August 27th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
so the caliper, is that for both buttcheeks or just one?
August 27th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
it should look like this \/\/
outer two thumbs, inner two pinkies
/i think’d
August 27th, 2009 at 5:06 pm
The entire assk ManKok. You gotta make the “W” shape with your pinkies touching (after the rotation). But don’t make it a tight W. So here’s your diagram - \/\/
August 27th, 2009 at 5:07 pm
OK, guys, good talk and a great waste of company time over the last hour-plus of my work day. Time to bounce outta’ here. Take it easy.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:08 pm
That’s it, but it’s a bit small. If you have your caliper end up like this, you have some more leeway: _| |_
August 27th, 2009 at 5:09 pm
extend your thumbs on the inside, extend you pinkies on the outside put your thumbs together the space between you pinkies is the right size of ass for you.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:10 pm
jesus. that IS one small ass. are we talking about skeletor here?
August 27th, 2009 at 5:11 pm
both cheeks. jonesing had it right in his first try–the double spiderman pose. the hands should not be touching. you rotate on the pinkies in the air, so yes you try to keep your pinkies where they are if you don;t have them on top of a flat surface. so, thumb tips touching, then rotate, keeping pinkies where they are. to me, where the thumbs end up is too big an ass for me. go Ndub, go! and thanks Jonesing and others
August 27th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
this thread needs to replace David Wright’s Girl at the top as kind of a “User’s Manual for Tapping Fat Ass”
August 27th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
I’m talking outside edge to outside edge, of course.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
young letfy’s diagram is exactly right. someone catch Ndub leaving the building. this is crucial for a brutha!
August 27th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
yes, the size ass should fit between the thumbs after rotation. remember you won’t think this is a small ass if you’re keeping the pinkies where they started
August 27th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
young letfy’s diagram is exactly right. someone catch Ndub leaving the building. this is crucial for a brutha!
now I know how Oppenheimer felt when they finished “The Manhattan Project”
August 27th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
The thought of him going up to fat chicks with the caliper trying to measure their ass is funny.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
I second the motion.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Fuck that this thing belongs in the All Time Internet Hall of Fame.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
i have to say, fellas, this is a proud moment for me to have been the genesis for such a fucked-up thread
August 27th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
This seems like to perfect time to mention the often mocked “sniff test.” When that fat girl takes off her panties, a smell is going to fill the room/car/bathroom stall. If that smell is a shitty smell, you probably don’t want to go any further. If it smells like a locker room on the last day of football season, that’s normal for a fat girl.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:28 pm
even though if i would have explained better in the first place maybe this wouldn;t have gone bonkers. so as my 4-year-old girl says, What’s gonna work? Teamwork!
August 27th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
dirt, if i smelled shit when elisha herself took them off, i might still gat after it, but i am not going downtown
August 27th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
This rule can be applied to girls of all body types, though Amanda Pflugrad could smell like my freshman dorm on Sunday morning and I would dig right in.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
Does Tucker Max have a comments section? I assume this is what it looks like.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:32 pm
It’s been one of those days for me. So, I would like to thank Spencer for making me laugh out loud harder than I have for a while. Kudos to you my good man.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm
I believe it was Ben Franklin who once said, “If it smells like fish, do what you wish. If it smells like cologne, leave it alone”.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:35 pm
I like the cut of your jib, Groin.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:40 pm
Best thread evah?!?!?!?!
August 27th, 2009 at 5:45 pm
Not to be a buzz kill, but some people who comment anonymously on a sports website discussed possibly fictional accounts of the times they theoretically had sex with ugly girls. The self-congratulations is a little much. I’m not sure cancer was cured.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:45 pm
Society as a whole has reached an all-time low.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:47 pm
TST, I’m waiting for the punchline. Sportsgal, we are a small sample size, and feel free to do what you will with the word ’small’
August 27th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Society as a whole has reached an all-time low.
needs more cursing
August 27th, 2009 at 5:49 pm
Thanks for clearing that up TST. And considering I didn’t post on this thread it wasn’t self-congratulations. Good luck finding your cure for cancer.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:51 pm
and TST, since there has been no punchline, it wasn’t ugly girls, it was fat girls. and at least half of the thread was about how to measure the width of an ass
August 27th, 2009 at 5:51 pm
I’m pretty sure the majority of you couldn’t get anyone BUT a fat chick to sleep with you.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:55 pm
There are several comments that are self-congratulatory bbryan, but in your case I apoligize. You were just dazzled by the fact that some people who comment anonymously on a sports website discussed possibly fictional accounts of the times they theoretically had sex with ugly girls.
There is no statistically significant difference between a fat girl and an ugly girl. Go read Baseball Prospectus.
August 27th, 2009 at 5:59 pm
hey look guys its a chick who is ugly but is under the illusion she is pretty! isn’t that just sad? some women think that because they are thin they pretty. again that is sad.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
It was more the comedy factor that invoked my response. It’s been a real shitty day and to get out of a brutal meeting and come read this thread was exactly what I needed. I obviously used a little too much hyperbole.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
I’m sincerely sorry Bryan, I thought it was funny too as long as it was this is what we’re doing, less so when it started to become look at what we did. It’s still a great thread.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
I mean, it offended Sportsgal enough to open her up to a straight right from mrejr, which is always nice.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:08 pm
You’re just pissed because the majority of us wouldn’t even let our wingman fall on the grenade that is you.
Good advice today, gents.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
and a uppercut from NDub! down goes ugly! down goes ugly!
August 27th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
No worries bro, I’m sorry for being an ass in response. Been a shitty day, boss man is trying to cut payroll and i’m fighting like hell to keep my whole staff, a battle I probably wont win. This is definately going to be a B&B night (beer & bong).
August 27th, 2009 at 6:16 pm
What’s really funny is a white trash, downstate Illinois piece of shit thinks he knows what I look like because he saw AH pic of me drunk, at a Bears game on twitter over a month ago. That, my friends, is comedy.
And NDub, if you’re taking sex advice from people on a sports blog, I’m pretty sure not even a “grenade” like me would have sex with you even if you put GHB in my drink.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:19 pm
the fuck? I leave for 20 minutes and miss this? I’m never closing the TBL tab on my firefox or leaving home without my Macbook ever again.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:20 pm
so since that bears game over a month ago you have went from ugly duckling to beautiful swan?
unpossible.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:20 pm
This thread is picking up a second a wind.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
that is funny
August 27th, 2009 at 6:22 pm
Mrejr saw a picture of Sportsgal on Twitter?
How is that even possible?
August 27th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
I just wish sportsgal woulda lost that bet and had to blow Tampa. You KNOW there would have ben twitpics of that event
August 27th, 2009 at 6:32 pm
Just to put things in perspective, mrej seems to think he’s attractive. He looks like Sam from Lord of the Rings if Sam had Down’s Syndrome.
August 27th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
haha. i do wonder what started this mrej vs sportsgal thing
August 27th, 2009 at 6:38 pm
i hate when couples fight
August 27th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
It’s actually more about what’s fat and what’s not than advice. Although there was some good stuff here.
The fact that you wouldn’t even qualify as a GHB victim indicates just how many branches you hit while falling from the top of the ugly tree.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:01 pm
Best Thread Ever.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:04 pm
Best Thread Ever.
taguchi: you wanna buzzkill this poor guy also, or should I just tell him to read #139?
/your choice
August 27th, 2009 at 8:13 pm
he doesn’t have a comments section, but if you want to you can have this kind of fun every day on his message board.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
And personally I just think this is what happens when we go too long without our PM Roundup.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:21 pm
after starting the whole “fat-ass caliper” part of the the thread, I grilled up some mean pork chops while feeding three kids aged 3 and 2 and 2 (twins). and i’m still laid off. how have i not been scooped up yet?
///fuckin’ self congratulatory
August 27th, 2009 at 8:30 pm
seems like sportsgal came here looking for a fight. i mean, i don’t go to feminist blogs looking for crass female behavior
August 27th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
Wow. I left and went and got Chinese food (and another chipwich) and I came back to see Sportsgal game into the fray. Why would you jump in front of a chinese bullet train like that?
This is definitely the best thread ever.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
Im sad I missed the end of this.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:33 pm
sc, whereabout are you in the chicago area? i think it would be cool to have an ale or seven with someone from TBL
August 27th, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Fat Bitches. Making TBL’s threads great since 2009.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:37 pm
tampa, you’re a chicago-area guy, too, yes? or you are but you live in Tampa? i think sportsgal hit and ran
August 27th, 2009 at 8:40 pm
I told her to run along. If I want her lip, I’ll rattle my zipper.
August 27th, 2009 at 8:43 pm
ndub, been practicing your caliper? you don’t want to get caught fumbling around when you’re in vicious fat-girl-fight
August 27th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
the natives were restless today. funny stuff.
August 28th, 2009 at 8:57 am
cant wait for school to start back up. damn kids on here
August 28th, 2009 at 9:43 am
irish, have you ever been fun?