Here’s former Washington Redskin lineman Mark Schlereth on Guiding Light recently. He played the role of somebody named Rock Hoover. Athletes and soap operas are an emerging trend – Luke Walton, Stephen A. Smith, the Milwaukee Brewers – so here’s a list of the next three guys we’d like to see in the soaps:

1. Tampa Bay Devilrays outfielder (for now, at least) Elijah Dukes as a under-medicated, bi-polar ballplayer with a freaky background. It’s a stretch, but we think he could pull it off.

2. New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady as a grifter who shows up in town, sleeps with any hottie who drifs into his orbit.

3. Sports Illustrated’s Peter King as a cloying coffee house barista who feels compelled to share his innermost feelings with every customer. One day, while Brady is at a table with a fetching redhead, Dukes rolls up to get some coffee, King annoys him with a travel tale about his last Southwest Airlines flight, and Dukes pulls out a 9 mm. Before he can pop a cowering King, Brady leaps in to save the day, is crowned a hero, gets noticed by a modeling scout, and ends up in Hollywood.

We’re Onto You, Rock Hoover(The Buried Lead)