San Diego 21, Green Bay 31: Fucking Favre. Grandpa threw a 57-yard TD pass to Greg Jennings with two minutes left as the Packers sent Norv’s boys to 1-2 while improving to an astonishing 3-0. Somewhere, Peter King slobbers.

Indianapolis 30, Houston 24: The Colts certainly don’t dominate on the road, but as long as you win, who cares?

Pittsburgh 37, San Francisco 16: Ladies man Jeff Reed kicked three field goals, Willie Parker rushed for 133 yards, and the Steelers bottled up Frank Gore (39 yards) to improve to 3-0.

Philadelphia 56, Detroit 21: We should take back whatever we said about Kevin Curtis. The smurf caught 204 yards worth of passes and three scores as the Eagles went bananas against the sorry Lions secondary. McNabb (he’s black!) threw for 381 yards.

New England 38, Buffalo 7: Brady went 22-for-28 for 291 yards and four scores. Maroney rushed for 101 yards. Unbeaten? Why not. Losman’s injury looked gross.

New York Jets 31, Miami 28: Chad Pennington returned and was his usual conservative self, but the Dolphins D looked shoddy without Zach Thomas, and fell to 0-3 despite a massive game from Ronnie Brown (211 total yards, three TDs).

Tampa Bay 24, St. Louis 3: Did you have Earnest Graham in your fantasy lineup? Doubtful. We don’t know what happened to the Caddy, but Graham scored twice as the Bucs improved to 2-1 and the sorry Rams fell to 0-3. Steven Jackson rushed for 115 yards for St. Louis.

Baltimore 26, Arizona 23: Kurt Warner was resurrected from the grave and sparked a comeback after Matt Leinart got knocked out in the first half, but a last second field goal by Matt Stover propelled the Ravens at home. Still, Baltimore blew two 17-point leads, and ended up with Kyle Boller under center, making us wonder why they didn’t go after Leftwich.

Minnesota 10, Kansas City 13: How could we have bet on the Vikings? On the road? Their QB is Kelly fucking Holcombe! Larry Johnson rushed for a whopping 36 yards. Lesson learned: when two shitty teams play, bet on the home team. Dammit!