Referees Love Brady, Belichick and the 12-0 Patriots
Uncategorized December 4th. 2007, 9:16am
Got stuck somewhere we couldn’t watch the thrilling Patriots/Ravens finish last night. Fortunately, The Big Deal (aka TBL2) answered his phone and turned in a Gus Johnson-like play-by-play performance. We pick it up with unbeaten New England facing 4th-and-1 in Baltimore territory with about two minutes left.
DEAL - I’m sick man. And tired. Skins game yesterday, partying, life in general.
TBL - Wanna turn on the game? Patriots are about to pull a West Virginia.
DEAL - [TV turns on.] What the …
TBL - You know I totally called this right? I’m going to look so prescient, like Nostradamus. Kyle Boller is totally going to end up being remembered as a Buster Douglas-type figure.
DEAL - Brady comes under center. Quick snap, QB sneak … DEEEE-Nied! OHHHH-
TBL - WHAT????? OHHHHHHH MY -
DEAL - No! The Ravens called timeout! What a brick.
TBL - Who called it, Chris Webber?
DEAL - No, an assistant coach. Do over. Ok … Brady takes the snap … they run it with the fullback … STOPPED! IT’S OVER!
TBL - WHAT???? OHHHHHHH MY -
DEAL - No! There’s a flag on the play. Delay of game on New England. Patriots are going to back up five yards and get another crack.
TBL - Probably better, actually, because Wes Welker exists for these very situations.
DEAL - Brady drops back … no pressure … he’s got room to scramble … man he’s slow … but he’s got it!
TBL - Nine lives havin’ bastards.
DEAL - Handoff, looks like Faulk, up the middle for about five yards.
TBL - You think Gisele has all her Victoria Secret model friends over, huddled around a TV, cheering on Brady?
DEAL - That or the computer. Gisele loves a good live blog. Second down … Brady pass over the middle, TIPPED AT THE LINNNNNEEEEE … and not intercepted.
TBL - Since there’s no chance the Pats cover, might as well root for the Ravens.
DEAL - Brady drops back … incomplete to the left side. Exactly one minute left. Another fourth down.
TBL - Plenty of time. Where’s Moss?
DEAL - He’s out there, just not open. Brady drops back … plenty of time … fires into the end zone … INCOMPLETE! IT’S OVER!
TBL - WHAT???? OHHHHH MY -
DEAL - No! They called another penalty. Looks like it’s on the Ravens for holding in the secondary. [Dog barks in the background. Translation: BULLSHIT.] Man, there’s gonna be some bitching when the Patriots win this one. Looks like the pass was intended for … Ben Watson?
TBL - New England must have seen that WVU game and had the refs shipped over. Belichick’s a deviant genius.
DEAL - I fear for Baltimore club-goers tonight. Ray Lewis may have to choke a bitch.
TBL - How smug and cocky will Brady look in post game presser if pulls this one out of his ass?
DEAL - Brady drops back … pump fake … fires left side in the corner of the end zone … touchdown! Number 10!
TBL - Who’s that, Diego Maradona?
DEAL - Gaffney. Wait hold on, it looks like [Cell phone signal dropped. No kidding.]
TBL - So what happened?
DEAL - They’re looking at replays, and there are also two flags on the play. Gaffney had both feet in, but may have been juggling it. Looks like it’ll hold up, though. Some idiot on the Ravens got two 15-yard penalties after the play. And he picked up the flag and thew it in the stands! It was number 57.
TBL - Gotta be that nutjob Bart Scott.
DEAL - Ok, touchdown stands, ballgame. 12-0. Steelers on deck.
TBL - I bet Don Shula is drunk and cursing at the TV right now.
Madness over Miracles (Ebony Bird)
28 Responses to “Referees Love Brady, Belichick and the 12-0 Patriots”
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December 4th, 2007 at 9:22 am
After the calls that went against them in the Colts game, they deserved this one; but yes, that 4th down holding call was terrible.
December 4th, 2007 at 9:34 am
The Patriots won because the Ravens’ bench out-thought themselves.
But I’m still amazed that the officials on the field for the Patriots game that week are the only people in the world who still don’t realize that Randy Moss commits offensive pass interference ON EVERY SINGLE GOD DAMMED PLAY.
And this isn’t exactly a new development, not just sour grapes.
December 4th, 2007 at 9:36 am
brian billick hearts rodney harrison
blew him three kisses, not one but three
December 4th, 2007 at 9:37 am
Horseshit.
December 4th, 2007 at 9:37 am
I don’t care who you are and how much you go screwed over in a past game, there is no excuse for bad calls.
December 4th, 2007 at 9:43 am
I listened to the radio broadcast, where you could clearly hear fans bitching within mic-shot and Boomer says “Oh man, it’s getting ugly here….” Good stuff.
December 4th, 2007 at 9:45 am
Shula was at the game. He was in the booth having his knob jobbed by Tirico, Tony & Jaws simultaneously while massaging the neck of a bottle of champagne that he was going to use to celebrate the Ravens victory. By the time the game ended, he was most likely in a bathroom deliverying a series of coded tow taps to Csonka in the next stall.
December 4th, 2007 at 10:16 am
Come on JPG, it is sour grapes. Moss is held on 100% of the routes he runs and says nothing. You cant make calls like that on every play. Hell, his “reputation” has cost him three TD’s this season to this point.
It also clearly was a hold, you cant stop a guy (with your hands!) from turning up the middle of the field for 7-10 yards. Thats called holding.
December 4th, 2007 at 10:51 am
if you don’t want penalties ruining a victory, don’t committ them. Ravens lost the game on their own stupid errors, and blaming the officials for taking Sean Taylor’s game from him is the most rediculous statement i’ve heard in a while.
December 4th, 2007 at 10:57 am
horrible job by the refs. the pats obviously are getting all the calls.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:02 am
Why isn’t nobody talking about the Hail Mary at the end that came up a yard short. That was exciting as hell.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:12 am
The Ravens had this game and they lost of on their own fuck ups (Ed Reed???). I think Willis McGahee’s efforts just werent enough, I think he kicked ass. I would have traded anything to be Gisele last night…you know Brady TURNED IT OUT last night in the dirtiest of ways. She probably pulled that tie open with her teeth and umm let me stop.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:13 am
sorry double negative
December 4th, 2007 at 11:14 am
Bart Scott put some hot sauce on that penalty flag
December 4th, 2007 at 11:15 am
my original message got deleted because of a shitty connection…
anyways, the refs weren’t to blame, the ravens being hotheads and, largely, retards were. ravens…if you’re going to cheat, at least don’t make it blatant, and then, when you do clearly foul, at least don’t bitch about it. those were all penalties, and if the ravens could, you know, benefit from decent coaching and showing a modicrum of discipline, they might have won…but they didn’t.
fuck the ravens, fuck ray lewis, fuck art, fuck bart scott. ogden is cool tho.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:16 am
That was a hold at the end, I don’t understand what people on this board or the Ravens are whining about.
You want to know why the Ravens are losers? Because it is always the ref’s fault. Waaaah, we lost to Cleveland because we weren’t loose for Overtime because we stupidly went to the locker room before the game had been decided. Waahhh, we lost to the Patriots because the refs cheated.
Ravens and their whiny fans should shut up, your team sucks, you lost, deal with it. Rant over.
By the way is anyone else experience a lot of difficulty logging into this site lately? I keep getting a server error.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:48 am
yea, ive been getting errors too.
December 4th, 2007 at 11:53 am
Randy Moss nearly ripped a Dolphins’ defender’s arm off to catch one of those jump-ball touchdowns earlier this year. No flag either way.
December 4th, 2007 at 12:15 pm
Some get called, some don’t. All of those penalties were deserved. Before the end of that game, I was thinking the Pats were getting screwed by calls. It goes both ways, and it always does.
The Boller INT cost them the game. Why throw the ball 30 yards downfield in swirling winds? Hand it off and take what you can get, Willis owned that game. After that the Pats stacked the box and shut it down cause there was no reason to fear the pass. The Ravens had 3 chances to burn the clock, and went 3 and out everytime. The Ravens D had them in check all night, and when it counted they didn’t finish it off. No one to blame but themselves. The Pats were lucky to get away with the win, but it takes luck in the NFL.
December 4th, 2007 at 12:17 pm
JGP…HAHA yeah if they called those offensive penalties on Moss the Dolphins clearly would have won. The Dolphins were getting smoked that game, what is your point?
December 4th, 2007 at 12:27 pm
jgp is a racist
December 4th, 2007 at 12:32 pm
Did anyone catch Mercury Morris on the ESPN pregame? What an obnoxious ass - Griese was much more candid and respectful. If nothing else, New England going undefeated will remove him from all relevancy.
The players on Baltimore’s defense are downright obnoxious. I’m sick of watching Ray-Ray, Bart Scott, Terrell Suggs, et al. dance around like idiots after every tackle (whether it’s for a loss or 10 yards downfield). Then, they blame anyone or anything (the offense, the playcalling, the refs, etc.) when they lose.
December 4th, 2007 at 12:43 pm
moss just like to play grab ass
December 4th, 2007 at 1:08 pm
TBL +1 for hot sauce dig.
December 4th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
2 straight incredibly lucky wins for the Pats against two pretty bad teams. Can we stop all the ‘best team ever’ nonsense? They’re an overrated team with no running game and a mediocre defense. They will not win the Super Bowl.
December 4th, 2007 at 1:49 pm
rothleshotdog
the best thing though that came out of Mercury Morris mouth besides his annoying comments was his statement ” dont call me when your in my town, call me when your on my block”
doesnt anyone remeber the colts going 13-0 and not making to the super bowl two years ago
the patriots are getting exploited on defense every week now, just a matter of time before they lose this year
December 4th, 2007 at 6:32 pm
there was nothing wrong with that holding penalty at the end of the game. i don’t see why everyone’s complaining about it. it was the easiest call ever.
December 4th, 2007 at 8:32 pm
Wes Welker got violated so much during the game, he’ll need therapy to recover from the trauma, and none of it was called.
The Ravens talk a lot and are never to blame when they lose. And Ray Lewis? Puhleez. I forget who the saying was originally about, but it applies to him perfectly: “he wants to be the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral.”
But hey–he is God’s Linebacker, so he’s got that going for him.