Before we get to our three theories about the impending Tom Brady boot controversy, we must direct you to the subhead in the shameless NY Post this morning: “Girlie Man Limps Home.” Why’s he in a protective boot, carrying flowers, and partying at Butter? Nobody knows the answer to any of these questions, but Butter blows. Regardless of what Brady told a radio station in Boston, and keeping in mind that he knows he’s going to be photographed/videotaped everytime he leaves Gisele’s West Village apartment here’s the best we got:

1) The boot is because he’s embarrassed about the three INTs, and clearly a sympathy grab (we suggest Brett Favre wear a cast on his right hand)
2) Strategic, psych-out move to get into the Giants’ heads
3) Who hasn’t stubbed a toe while aggressively knocking boots with a Victoria’s Secret model, celebrating a trip to the most-watched sporting event of the year?

Brady’s status apparently means nothing, though, because I Am Legend already predicted a Patriots 23-7 victory.

Flowery Tom a Posy Patsie (NY Post)
Shaky Brady Sporting Cast on Foot (Boston Herald)
I Am Legend Predicts Patriots Win Over Giants (Ballhype)