The tale of Scott Spiezio is one straight out of the weird machine.  In this morning’s St. Louis Post-Dispatch, some more bizarre details have surfaced via police reports obtained by the paper, summarized thusly…

Spiezio and his wife Jen ate at Ruth’s Chris Steak House in Irvine, where Scott reportedly drank 6 Grey Goose vodkas with cranberry (cranberry?  what a douche). Â After dinner, they went to a Newport Beach restuarant where together they drank more vodka and an “energy drink” (at least, that’s what the Spiezios call it).

From there, Spiezio left his wife at the restaurant and recklessly drove through traffic before crashing into a fence.Â

One witness told police he saw a man climb out of the driver’s side door, crawl over the fence and cross the street. The witness said he yelled to the man and asked if anyone was injured and that the man replied, “No, no one injured, no one injured,” and then ran off.”… At least one witness later identified the man as Spiezio.  When police arrived, they found Spiezio’s iPhone and Louis Vuitton wallet in the car. In the wallet were Spiezio’s Illinois drivers license and credit cards.

Spiezio then went to his buddy’s house and the friend tried to help heal Spiezio’s bloody hand, at which point Spiezio thanked him by vomiting everywhere.  Things got violent, since his friend didn’t appreciate Spiezio’s lack of warning or movement to the toilet. Â While scuffling, Spiezio told his friend “You know I can kick your ass!”  (!!!)

From there, Spiezio went to his condo where police later arrived.  Jen Spiezio answered the door and told police that Scott had a severe case of pneumonia and wasn’t to be bothered.  They eventually made their way inside and couldn’t find him, but…

“there was what appeared to be a storage closet that we were unable to gain entry into. … It seemed that the door was being held shut from the inside, or was locked from the inside…  Another report read: “It is believed that Scott Spiezio was hiding behind this door.”

Spiezio’s voicemail currently says “Things are a little crazy right now.”

Yep.

Police Reports on Spiezio describe bizarre night [STL Today]