The Roundup: Let’s talk about something other than the Tournament
Barry Bonds, Baseball, Blogging, Media Gossip/Musings, NFL March 22nd. 2008, 11:15am
Kelly Kapowski was, is and forever will be the love to my television’s life. She’s everything a TV could ever want. Warm, beautiful, kind, good with the kids, a tad ditzy but mostly intelligent… safe to say TV was a little upset when she and Zack finally tied the knot in the terrible Saved by the Bell: Wedding in Las Vegas special. But we’ll always have our memories of Kelly, won’t we TV?  And since you can’t read this, let me tell you that she still looks great today, as evidenced by Google searching.
Now we give way to your non-NCAA Roundup. Plenty of Tourney talk to come (and if you do talk Tourney in the comments, I’ll sucker punch you in the junk).
PacMan Jones and his lawyer think PacMan Jones is a good fit for the New England Patriots. I want to come up with something witty here, but I feel the joke writes itself. [Boston Herald]
Good news for Packers fans: Atari Bigby inked a 1 year deal to stay in Green Bay. [PackersNews]
Lofa Tatupu is now a very rich man. [Tribune News Blog]
Weird: Jason Elam signs a 4 year deal with Atlanta. He will still wear a Broncos uniform on gameday, however. [The Falcoholic]
The quarterfinals for the sports media madness tournament. [Sports Media Journal]
Some info on the salary structure for the online residents at Gawker. [Porfolio.com]
If you feel compelled to do so, you can create your own highlight montage of NCAA Tourney action set to the tune of “One Shining Moment”. I would be all over it if it involved a Rick Astley song. [CNBC Sports Biz]
Mark DeRosa has had enough of the trade talks involving Mark DeRosa. [Chicago Sports]
Tigers’ newbie Dontrelle Willis has walked 10 and allowed nine earned runs in his last 8 2/3 innings of spring ball. That’s awful, by the way. [Tiger Blog]
Barry Bonds’ perjury and obstruction of justice trial has been pushed back to June. Victor Sifuentes is pissed. [NY Daily News]
An ex Olympic cyclist is serving the role of Barry Bonds guinea pig. [San Jose Mercury News]
49 Responses to “The Roundup: Let’s talk about something other than the Tournament”
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March 22nd, 2008 at 11:21 am
Nothing like three episodes of 90210 int he AM, followed by that photo!
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:28 am
Pac-Man? Atari? I feel that in the interest of fairness, there should be a Donkey Kong item.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:32 am
Why are you posting articles that suggest that Pacman is interested in the Patriots? Don’t you know that the Cowboys are interested? Oh wait, you don’t work for ESPN.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:41 am
@Jim: Did you see “The King of Kong?” It was a documentary about the best Donkey Kong players in the world. Top Notch. These dudes are a basketful of unintentional humor.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:41 am
So Leitch is making ~$70,000 per year? Not bad.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:44 am
@hef – Not yet, but it’s in my queue.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:44 am
as great, and i mean seriously fucking great, as the Tigers’ lineup is, what good is it if your pitching staff is Verlander-deep? nate? meh. bonderman? meh. miller…oh that’s right, THANK GOD he got traded. and now willis is sucking as predicted in a deeper offensive league? heavens no!
they still scare the poop outta me tho. hope fausto wasn’t a fluke and CC can still kick ass.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:47 am
@MikeNYC – He’s probably making a bit more since he is a “site lead.”
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:52 am
I am heartbroken that Jason Elam has signed with the Falcons. However, it is not because he is my kicker in my keeper fantasy league, and I have zero allegiance to the Broncos.
It’s because the 78-year-old Morten Andersen is probably done for good now.
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:52 am
Basketball
March 22nd, 2008 at 11:59 am
haha, nice try Diesel. But NBA doesn’t put you in douche-nozzle territory. He clearly said NCAA Tourney.
Hey, I am in 150th place in The Big Lead Crew brackets.
Imig is from St Louis, home of the kindest fans in all the world. He wouldn’t dare hurt me.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Gonzo- you obviously haven’t been reading the message boards at STLtoday.com. It makes me ashamed to be a Cardinals fan….
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:14 pm
70th. Please, Hammer, don’t hurt me.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Fill me in Bruce. Did Joe Buck get nominated for the STL Hall of Fame?
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:31 pm
Are you in St. Louis now? How bad is the flooding over there?
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
I can’t see the pic… what era is it a shot of Tiffani from.. my favorite era was her 90210 days.
I will miss Morten Andersen too
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Onterrio, Tiffany A-T hasn’t been relavent for 10 years, so I can’t tell you how recent the picture is. Although she has that “Stick it in my ass” look on her face.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:39 pm
good enough on both points there
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Hasn’t been relevant in 10 years? What, so all those lifetime movies meant NOTHING to you?
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 pm
She should have gone the seedy movie (not quite Skinemax) route instead of the Valerie Bertinelli Lifetime route
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:46 pm
What an amazing pic. How old is she know?
Much better than your trashy wrestling fare, Patrick.
24th in the pool.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Don’t trash Lifetime! Delta Burke, Melissa Gilbert, and that chick from “Who’s the Boss” need jobs too.
/sarcasm
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Jay
pretending you don’t know Judith Light’s name.. you are better then that!
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:49 pm
The Tigers don’t need pitching. I could start for them and they would still outscore every team by 8 runs. Tigers will win the AL pennant
(God, I hate Detroit; I hope I’m wrong).
@Gonzo, yes, that is an accurate description of her facial expression. And yes, she did look great in the 90210 days. But does no one remember how chubby she got after the first season? She went from a LA 10, to a Mississippi 7 in a span 10 months.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:52 pm
I swear I didn’t know that LOL. Lifetime probably has some good shows, you know that one hour a day that they don’t show those “Men Are Evil” movies or “The Golden Girls.”
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:54 pm
That one hour is devoted to home shopping, I believe.
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:57 pm
cant wait for Xaver v. Purdue
March 22nd, 2008 at 12:57 pm
There are actually only four Lifetime movies. They just showing them over and over:
“My Husband Beats Me”
“I’ve Been Sexually Harrassed”
“Some Guy Is Stalking Me”
“I Want My Baby Back” (not Chili’s)
I know way too much about Lifetime.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:02 pm
You left out “Eating Disorders 101,” bro.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:03 pm
you also left out “getting menstruation stains out of white cotton panties” hosted by rosie “heavy flow” o’donnell.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:06 pm
“My Husband Beats Me  and i want my life back
“I’ve Been Sexually Harrassed  and i will make him pay
“Some Guy Is Stalking Me†…and he must stop
“I Want My Baby Back†(not Chili’s)…the Melinda Douglass story
you forgot the dot dot dots and the “famous person” it’s based on
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Has there been a sadder moment in television history than when Kelly broke up with Zack outside the costume ball while AC and Jessie sang (lipsanc?) How Am I Supposed To Live Without You? I think not. Man do I hate that Jeff!
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Jeff was the college guy who cheated on her later which ultimately led to Zack and Kelly getting back together which was the happiest moment in TV history. You see guys, life is cyclical and all things work together for the greater good of attractive people on poorly written sitcoms. The Easter Season helps us realize this.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Yes, but Jeff was also the guy who broke them up in the first place. He was Kelly’s boss at The Max and caused her to question her feelings for Zack. (It feels ghey typing that out.)
On second thought, I’d say THE saddest moment in TV history was when Winnie broke up with Kevin so she could be with that douche at her new school. I was/am devastated.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:31 pm
think about it tho, that might have been the most realistic scenario in the shows history. if you were an uber-hot HS chick, who would you rather bang? the guy who can give you benefits and buy you booze and get you into clubs or the guy who plays the most hideously awful fake-guitar in the history of man?
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:34 pm
And lets not forget that after the “Jeff Breakup” Zach was tapping a hot USC chick, which led him to find out that Jeff was cheating on Kelly at the over 18 dance club that required fake ID’s. So Zach got some college ass and eventually got back together with Kelly anyway.
March 22nd, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Props to Jeff. I would have given my left nut and right eye to bang Kelly.
March 22nd, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Jeff can kiss my ass.
March 22nd, 2008 at 2:35 pm
No flooding where I am, but a couple nearby highway was shut down because of the rising Meramec River. They’re saying the floods are likely to be worse than ‘93.
Yikes.
March 22nd, 2008 at 3:10 pm
I will once again share my story of playing quarters with Tiffany back in 1993 (the height of Kelly Kapowski) she wasnt very good, so she got real drunk and started making out with her lady friend.
March 22nd, 2008 at 3:48 pm
Where, must I ask, was this? I want more details.
March 22nd, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Long Beach Cali at an off campus frat house near Long Beach State, I was still in High School and worked with a the certain lady friend of hers. They showed up at the party and we played quite a few rounds of speed quarters. She was very nice, and very HOT. I was 17 so my hormones were racing. I thought I had a shot(a kid can dream can’t he?) but the 2nd best scenario panned out when she started making out with her lady friend on a bet. Looked like they had done it before, very skilled I must say. The last thing i remember from that night was drinking many shots at the bar with her and a couple other groupies who were following her around.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:01 pm
I’m going to pretend this really happened even if it’s not true.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Absolutely true
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Visual evidence will be required.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:15 pm
If camera phones would have been around, I would definitely have evidence. Since they weren’t, all I have to hold on to are my high school memories. Like most of us.
March 22nd, 2008 at 5:17 pm
owl…it’s a shame you had to share this on a weekend. this story deserves a FAR wider audience.
TBL should put this story in Ballin’ on Monday.
March 22nd, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Hey guys. tremendous comments today on Tiffant A-T. Or shall we call her
TAT? Perhaps OWL X has some photos to prove his six degrees of seperation?
March 22nd, 2008 at 7:40 pm
Gonzo- per your Joe Buck question; no he hasn’t, and if there is a God, he won’t be. ‘Course, I don’t live in STL(I’m in VA), so what do I know?