Weeks of frothing about the viral vengeance of budding internet legend Kimbo Slice came to an abrupt halt Saturday when the clock struck midnight during the network TV debut of Mixed Martial Arts: the man with a snarl that could scatter pigeons was on his back with both of his arms pinned to the mat by a tomato can, and taking repeated forearm shivers to the head (fight video here and part two here). Time was up, Cinderella – back to the backyard brawling. And take your laughable ground game – the weakest since France? – with you.

Among the mixed reactions in the last 36 hours: the fight was fixed (lots of circumstantial proof), Kimbo should become a boxer (makes sense), and ratings were either disappointing, impressive, or simple better than the NHL.

Having now seen exactly one MMA card (and really, only the last three fights), we’re in no position to offer an authoritative analysis on Saturday’s happenings. But based on email response, extensive analysis from an MMA-loving relative, and weekend reading, here’s a neophyte’s take:

* It pains us to say this, because we thoroughly enjoy his brawling videos, but he’s an MMA fraud. He’s got a compelling story, he’s a scary-looking character, and more than anything, he moves the meter. We received more text messages Saturday about the fight than any sporting event, perhaps ever. And we’ve hardly ever discussed MMA with any of our friends. But Kimbo’s not cut out to have a successful career in this sport, regardless of what this man is teaching him.

* Still, we’d definitely pay to watch Brock Lesnar – who is considered a hack, apparently – fight Kimbo, even though that probably will never happen.

* At the risk of invoking a boxing comparison: Thompson may have been considered a nobody coming into this fight – and that may still be the case – but has anyone ever seen a man take that many punches to the face and not go down? What we found most messed up about the third round stoppage was that Thompson never went down, and seemed to have his bearings – so what if his ear seemed to be hanging on for dear life? Why not have the doctor come in and give him an assessment before calling the fight? This is just one of the reasons folks think the fight was fixed.

* What type of world do we live in when you can turn on network TV Saturday night and see a girl browbeat another girl to the point where the loser ends up with a golf ball growing under one eye?

* Right after Thompson’s ear was busted and the ref stopped the fight, didn’t Colossus look like the beast in Goonies? We still don’t have a screengrab of it, but we’re hopeful.

Kimbo’s Fame Takes a Hit (Star-Ledger)