I Know How To Fix The Yankees…
Baseball November 15th. 2008, 1:00pm
Sign everyone.
How can it not work? If the Yankees are the only ones with anyone under contract, they’ll win the World Series almost by default!
Currently the Yankees have a record 6-year, $140 million contract on the table for Fat Albert with an arm-cannon, CC Sabathia. Of course the Yankees aren’t stopping with the biggest free agent. They’re also preparing offers for AJ Burnett and Derek Lowe. Oh, and they’re also talking about trading for Jake Peavy.
The Steinbrenners are presumably pissed off that 10 other teams in the league topped the $100 million payroll mark in the 2008 season. $200 million just doesn’t seem that impressive now. Screw a quarter-billion, let’s go straight for $300 million. And why stop there?
The Yankees traded for Nick Swisher earlier this week, but that didn’t take them out of the running for another prize free agent, Mark Teixeira. From the Washington Post:
While the Red Sox are itching to add a slugger, and the New York Yankees appear ready to exert their financial might to a degree not seen in at least several years — they are expected to go hard after Sabathia plus at least one other elite pitcher, and (at least according to Hank Steinbrenner) perhaps RamÃrez, too — an equally intriguing pursuer exists at the opposite end of baseball’s food chain.
Hear that? The Yankees are ready to smash open that piggy bank. Finally! I’m sick of them spending conservatively!
So what’s the count here…
The rotation is Sabathia, Peavy, Burnett, Lowe, Chamberlain, Mussina and Pettite. Each guy gets a specific day to start. If your day happens to be an off day, you lose the start. Sorry.
Positionally, the Yankees will have last year’s lineup – minus Giambi – plus Teixeira, Swisher, Manny and… Well, I’m sure there’s someone else you’ve heard of the Yankees could throw money at.
The baseball season is long after all. There will be plenty of time for everyone to play. Might I suggest the Yankees follow little league rules in the club house? Everyone has to play a certain amount of innings and get a minimum number of at-bats or its a forfeit. Seems like Dusty Baker is the obvious fit here.
It’s crazy, but it just might work. Of course, you have to wonder if they’ll ever address an actual need and pursue a shortstop.
18 Responses to “I Know How To Fix The Yankees…”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
November 15th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
It feels like I’ve heard this theory before somewhere….
November 15th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
Hey lets, like, get pissed at the Yankees for trying to sign people&*!@#^&!#! Who the fuck do they think they are trying to get better by signing the best FAs on the market?! The nerve of these assholes, right?!?!?!!#$*!@$^*!(#$
November 15th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Agreed.
November 15th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Why fix them? I like this team better when broken.
November 15th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Isn’t Joba going back to the pen? That’s what the grapevine told me.
November 15th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Was Joba’s rehab covered by his PPO, or did the Yankees have to pony up extra cash for it?
November 15th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
No, Joba is in the starting rotation. The owners, Girardi, and Joba have confirmed this. Mussina is probably going to retire, no more Giambino (fucking sterling) or Abreu, and hopefully Matsui will just retire (although that means we’ll have an outfield of Damon, Melky/Gardner, Nady. Yikes.)
November 15th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Also, if the Yanks get Peavy, I will shit myself and post pictures on this website of such haha
November 15th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Id like for them to spend 300 million and not make the playoffs too.
I wonder who they’d have to give up for Peavy. Probably enough to where it wouldn’t be worth it. Then again I’m hungover so what do I know
November 15th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
it certainly wouldn’t make them any worse.
And when it fails we can all take solace in the fact that money can’t buy you everything.
Hallmark’d
November 15th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Did this post come off as angry? I was going for sarcastic. Maybe overly sensitive Yankee are the only ones that took this the wrong way.
November 15th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
CRM, funny, my idea on how to fix the Yankees involved binoculars, camoflague and napalm.
November 15th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
The Yanks will not get Peavy. And if they do sign CC, they will go after either Burnett or Lowe. You can pencil in Lowe in a Red Sox uniform, so he is not signing with the Yanks. They are going to make sure if CC signs for another team, it will not be because of money. Look for them to trade Johnny Damon and possibly Matsui for an upgrade in the outfield. Rotation should be(hope so) CC, Wang, Joba, Burnett and Pettite. As far as who they try and get in the outfield, I can only say I am puzzled as to why Holliday went to the A’s.
November 15th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
How are they going to trade an outfielder for a better outfielder?
November 15th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Nick – The Yankees have pulled the wool over the eyes of more than one GM
November 15th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
No one wants Damon. Also, I really hope they don’t go after/land Burnett; he’s always hurt.
November 15th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Signing Tex would be the best move they could make.
November 15th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
How dare they go ahead and use their resources and wealth and actually try to get better?
Where do they get off in NY?
With 90 mill coming off the payroll they should just field a team at 120 mill. Forget the new ballpark and revenues approaching a billion dollars.