Having spent ample time on the Sports Illustrated website Thursday night, attempting to solve absolute zero, er, determine who the hottest SI model is, we finally began to understand your lust for the female photographed above, Marissa Miller.

Good choice.

(Aside: SI.com turned into some kind of oasis this week, no? Admit it – you’ve been there at least a dozen times in the last hour. Not that you’ve scrolled down past the GINORMOUS SWIMSUIT banner at the top, but still, you’re going there. Conspiracy theory time: Did ESPN push John Amaechi to come out on Valentine’s Day … knowing that it could possibly garner a big enough publicity hit to take some wind from the sails of the Swimsuit issue? Not that anyone wants to read about a formerly gay NBA player … but it’s an interesting topic that has been discussed everywhere from Howard Stern to CNN to Fox News. Why would Amaechi come clean now? Why this week? Only the shadow knows …)

However, we’re going to have to stick with Yesica Toscanini. Probably because we haven’t seen enough of her, whereas Miller has been around for a few years. Plus, there’s the whole first name thing, which kind of rocks. Plus, we’re more into brunettes than blondes. The only other swimsuit model we give the nod to over Miller is Anne V, mostly because Akon’s ‘Smack that’ is on her playlist. Dipping into the ipod of an SI model … fun. Miller seems to be more of a rock chick, and that’s swell. Plus, we’re afraid of birds, and that large parrot on her shoulder is mildly terrifying.

Ok, that should do it for our SI.com swimsuit coverage. It’s exhausting work, sifting through photos of gorgeous women for hours on end. If SI is hiring a ‘consultant’ to ‘oversee’ any of next year’s shoots, we would gladly like to be of service. Just let us known where to send the resume.

Beyonce is SI’s Dreamgirl (Pass the Word)

PS – It would be remiss of us not to mention two videos that should make your Friday afternoon more palatable – gorgeous Selita Ebanks and stacked Bar Refaeli.