NFL Power Rankings
Uncategorized October 30th. 2007, 3:49pm
We would like to apologize to the Chicago Bears fans in the crowd. First, for injuries that have helped ruin your season. And also for Cedric Benson. To the newbies who are here for the first time thanks to Mr. Van Pelt … it all stems from this preseason post.
1. New England Patriots – Four of their last seven against the Colts have been decided by a TD or less.
2. Indianapolis Colts – Can you imagine them scoring 40 points and losing?
3. Dallas Cowboys – Sophia Bush … Britney Spears … who’s next, Belinda Carlisle?
4. Green Bay Packers – Leapfrog Giants with impressive road win.
5. New York Giants – Brandon Jacobs has 16 fewer yards than Cedric Benson. He’s also played three fewer games.
6. Tennessee Titans – Fourth-worst passing offense in the NFL is balanced out by 7th-best scoring defense.
7. Pittsbugh Steelers – Serious chance to open up the division lead over the next two weeks with home games against Baltimore and Cleveland.
8. San Diego Chargers – We’ll know if they are fully back in two weeks when the Colts come to town.
9. Jacksonville Jaguars – Quinn Mother F’in Gray. Can he win two in a row on the road?
10. Washington Redskins – Bummer about Carlos Rogers.
11. Seattle Seahawks – Blah, squared.
12. Detroit Lions – Finally, a team that keeps the ball away from Devin Hester. See, it works!
13. Cleveland Browns – We need to start a ‘Derek Anderson is the next …’ discussion.
14. Baltimore Ravens – Just an opinion: if the Ravens start Kyle Boller this week in Pittsburgh, they will definitely lose. If they start Steve McNair, they have a 10% chance of winning.
15. Tampa Bay Bucs – Can we just talk about Tampa strip clubs intead?
16. Denver Broncos – Travis Henry was deactivated last night due to ’sore ribs.’ You know this was baby-daddy related.
17. New Orleans Saints – Reggie Bush: three TDS, one fumble lost, and zero 100-yard games.
18. Carolina Panthers – If our Panthers are going to reach the Super Bowl, they need to win this week in Tennessee.
19. Philadelphia Eagles – We’re not as down on these guys as everyone else.
20. Arizona Cardinals – Only four teams have scored more points in the NFC.
21. Chicago Bears – Cedric Benson is now just 534 yards from 1,000 for the season.
22. Kansas City Chiefs – After seven games, nobody could have guessed they’d be tied for the AFC West lead.
23. Houston Texans – Was the 2-0 start a sham? Or can we blame the injuries?
24. Oakland Raiders – Three of the five losses are by a total of nine points.
25. Buffalo Bills – The least interesting QB controversy, perhaps ever: JP Losman vs. Trent Edwards.
26. Cincinnati Bengals – Do not ask why we secretly believe Marvin Lewis will turn this around.
27. Minnesota Vikings – Brooks Bollinger! Hahahaha.
28. Atlanta Falcons – From that LeBatard link this morning … why doesn’t Harrington go by Joe instead of Joey?
29. New York Jets – Kellen Clemens, good luck against an angry Redskins defense.
30. San Francisco 49ers – The passing offense is averaging 132 yards per game, by far worst in the NFL. Alex Smith will not solve this problem.
31. Miami Dolphins – Not to be a hater, but will anyone give us odds on Jesse Chatman rushing for more yards than Ced Benson this year?
32. St. Louis Rams – At what point does Torry Holt sound off?
60 Responses to “NFL Power Rankings”
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October 30th, 2007 at 3:53 pm
“Dallas Cowboys – Sophia Bush … Britney Spears … who’s next, Belinda Carlisle?”
Wtf? How do you get from Sophia Bush and Britney Spears to the 50 year-old chick from the Go-Go’s?
Has TBL been dining on paint chips again?
October 30th, 2007 at 3:57 pm
I think it’s time San Diego returned to the top 5.
October 30th, 2007 at 3:59 pm
Three NFC teams in the Top 5? PIT, SD and JAX are all superior to them, IMO.
October 30th, 2007 at 3:59 pm
My Redskins remain in the top ten, I think that answers my question.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
I’d have Pittsburgh at 3 myself…of course this is all a pointless pursuit thanks to the whole “playoff” thing.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:02 pm
A couple of things:
Good riddance to Carlos Rogers, he sucks
Yes, McNair gives the Ravens a slightly better chance but he still sucks
I’d like to see how Tom Brady would do if his offensive line couldn’t protect and his wide receivers were Arnaz Battle, Darrell Jackson and Ashley Lelie. I will keep saying this until I am blue in the face, Alex Smith is not the problem.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:03 pm
I love those old posts:
‘Hey TBL, are you stupid or something?’
‘The Bears EASILY win their division’
‘Rex isn’t that great, but he can get the job done’
‘They’ll win their games by AT LEAST a touchdown’
‘Burn MotherFucker. What kind of a fucking idiot says the bears won’t be good? Fuckin’ Ditka’s gonna beat your blogging ass’.
Where are the Bears fans now? Oh yeah, hoping Kobe comes to Chicago.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:03 pm
The Pats line pass protects so well that it’s becoming ridiculous.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Derek Anderson is the next Carson Palmer…yes I’m a Browns fan, and yes I own a bong.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
The Rams, Dolphins, 9ers, Jets and Falcons in a rematch would beat the vikings right now. Simply for the fact my hometown teams coach just plain sucks.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:10 pm
If Anderson is the real deal, won’t they try to trade Quinn to, say, the Vikings or Falcons, for their first round pick? I mean, he’s got to be up there with Brohm, Woodson and Ryan, right?
October 30th, 2007 at 4:12 pm
i think if anything happens to a browns QB it will be anderson, he is a RFA at the end of this year…
October 30th, 2007 at 4:13 pm
I love it that you have the Bills so low. The country continues to forget about them, and I cash in with a cover every sunday.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:13 pm
@Maj – Until the NFL adopts a playoff system every Super Bowl champion will have an asterisks next to its name. Good point
October 30th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
*
‘i’ and ’s’ look very similar to me
October 30th, 2007 at 4:16 pm
Maj … it’s called a ‘downward spiral’
October 30th, 2007 at 4:18 pm
Mike F, if Anderson keeps playing at his current level I think we will see the San Diego situation over again, they will play Quinn eventually.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Mike F – Anderson would be the one traded, not Quinn. Cleveland’s already invested too much in Quinn as it is.
And yes, as a Vikings fan, I can honestly say I’d be overjoyed at having Derek Anderson the starting QB. And now I’m gonna go drink til my heart stops.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
Maj … it’s called a ‘downward spiral’
Call me crazy, but I think Belinda’s a step-up from Britney.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
Spears is rock bottom
October 30th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Mike F, if Anderson keeps playing at his current level I think we will see the San Diego situation over again, they will play Quinn eventually.
You don’t tell Mike Florio what’s going to happen, he tells you what’s going to happen and you’ll fucking like it!
October 30th, 2007 at 4:31 pm
TBL, Maj:
After doing some “research,” I’ll have to side with UM here. Carlisle appears to be a full-fledged, factory certified Cougar.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:33 pm
Mike F.
Wouldn’t Quinn have more value than Brohm and all the others seeing as he showed a hint of NFL success and a year’s worth of experience rather than being completely untested? Would that even warrant a first round pick from another team?
October 30th, 2007 at 4:35 pm
I’ve got Arizona State #3……..Oops wrong rant. Wait why do I care about the NFL. They settle on the field.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Carlisle appears to be a full-fledged, factory certified Cougar. and she’s not a total fucking train wreck of a human being.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
Well, if Quinn does have more value than Brohm, why wouldn’t that warrant a first rounder from another team? If Quinn was in this year’s draft, he’d almost certainly be a Top 15 pick. If they think Anderson, who’s only 24 (I think), is a legit “franchise” QB, then why not sign him long term, and ship Quinn to the Vikes/Falcons for a Top 10 pick, and pick up a defensive player?
October 30th, 2007 at 4:38 pm
and she’s not a total fucking train wreck of a human being.
Well, yeah…that too.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:42 pm
isnt Travis Henry scheduled to be suspended for smoking pot ? a couple weeks ago they were saying week 9 would be the time. i think that is here now.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:45 pm
have they even heard his appeal yet?
October 30th, 2007 at 4:47 pm
I heard he smoked it but didn’t inhale
October 30th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
Just a guess … they know Anderson’s just on a hot streak, and this probably wont last forever. They aren’t giving up on quinn this early, no way. He could ride the pine this year and all of next year.
Plus, as about half a dozen teams have shown, you need a second QB in this league. They’re fragile. You can’t dump Quinn.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
Hell, what would he say ? He should just admit it.
“Mr Goodell, I have 9 kids that i know about; 8 baby mommas to support; wouldnt YOU smoke a lil ganja ?”
October 30th, 2007 at 4:49 pm
Mike, are you really suggesting that one of the league’s bottom-feeders would give up their top-ten draft pick for Brady Quinn? Both of those teams passed on him in the top-ten of last year’s draft, and the public perception of Quinn certainly isn’t on the rise. Are you saying that this year’s draft is that bereft of talent?
October 30th, 2007 at 4:53 pm
There are going to probably 5 QB’s as talented if not more then Quinn. He probably doesn’t even have value of a 1st round pick anymore.
October 30th, 2007 at 4:55 pm
Houston’s 2-0 start wasn’t a sham, 4 of our 5 losses are against quality teams, teams ranked 2nd, 6th, 8th, and 9th in your own power rankings. Granted, that other one is against Atlanta, but we’re still getting used to this whole “being competitive” thing.
Still, we’ve got Raiders, Saints, and Cleveland coming up and I fully expect to win at least 2 of those to climb back to .500 before having to go through the second half of our division schedule.
If this team was in the NFC, they’d be in the playoff hunt (which probably says more about the NFC than it does the Texans, but you take what you can get).
October 30th, 2007 at 4:57 pm
Yes, but you have to consider why they passed on him. Atlanta still had Mike Vick, so why would they take a QB; the Vikes were sold on Tavaris Jackson, apparently, their 2nd rounder from last year (?), who is now riding the pine. This will be a new draft, with new needs, and now both teams desperately need QB help.
If you accept that fact, and think they will go QB with their (presumed) Top 10 picks this year, then who are they going to target? Brohm, Woodson, or Ryan? Now, if you think Quinn is only the fourth best prospect of that group, then we can agree to disagree. But if you don’t, well, then I think you’ve answered your own question.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:00 pm
Isn’t that consecutive weeks you described the Seahawks as ‘Blah’? I’m freakin’ tired of that shit TBL. You give a freakin blurb on every other goddamn team in the Gaddamn league and the Hawks get nothing, for 2 straight weeks. I can write it for you and email it to you it would go like this: “The Hawks had a bye this week and head to Cleveland to run roughshod over the no-defense Browns. A healthy Branch could spark the offense and loosen up the Browns enough to get the running game going.”
The Hawks might be a little ‘Blah’ but so are all but about the top 4 teams in the league.
Not only did you disrespect my Hawks but yesterday you threw out some bullshit about the Pac-10 being overrated with no evidence to support that opinion. Step your game up fellas, your better than that.
SPENCER 096: It goes down this weekend. Julian Peterson is going to shatter Derek Anderson’s pelvis into countless pieces, then pick up the ball and stiff arm Jamal Lewis so hard he goes back to slangin yayo, then score a touchdown.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:05 pm
I would take Woodson, Brohm, Ryan and Brennan over Quinn. There is a reason teams passed up and it is not because they felt good at their QB situation. If they thought Quinn was the next Elway or Marino they don’t pass up regardless of who they had as qb.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:16 pm
I won’t ask you why you think it, but I know for sure there’s no way Marvin Lewis turns around the train wreck that is the Bengals. That is, unless he learns how to a) manage the clock, b) use timeouts, c) challenge smart plays, and d) grow some sack (or give some to Bob Bratkowski) with some of the playcalling.
That, and having some decent players on D would help.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:18 pm
jmorris…can i buy some of your crack? it sounds like it’s the shit. i cant wait to see joe thomas put peterson on his ass.
YYSA…you would take colt brennan over quinn? despite the notorious track record of QB’s in a similar offense (andre ware, david klingler) who hasnt played anyone east of utah?
completely unbiased (i wasn’t sold on quinn last year, and im not really that sold on him this year), id say that brohm and quinn are pretty close in terms of being an NFL prospect. i think ryan is comparable to john beck and woodson…im not even sure. but to say that quinn isnt in that group is asinine. especially seeing as he has seen the NFL for a year, something none of those guys have.
and yes team needs evolve. jackson showed enough promise to warrant a second look, and the vikes now realize that he isnt the answer so they’re probably in the market for a QB. and, anyways, would you have taken Quinn over AP?
October 30th, 2007 at 5:19 pm
Jmorris – Whoa. Easy tiger. Last week is was just Blah. This week it’s Blah-squared! I wanted to make a Koren Robinson joke, but I’m tired.
The Vikings aren’t a bad fit for Quinn. He’ll invite male strippers on the sex boat. If you figure Ryan, Woodson and Brohm are the top three QBs taken, and they all go in the first round … then maybe the Vikings explore that.
Is the guy who drafted Jackson fired? What exactly was he sold on? That’s a terrible call.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
I’d rather hear BLAH for the Eagles than have TBL get my hopes up like “We’re not as down on these guys as everyone else.” I think the Eagles are cooked.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:50 pm
Personally I wouldn’t select a quarterback in the top ten…ever. That being said, I’d certainly select Woodson, Brohm, and possibly Ryan ahead of Quinn at this point. Now if Quinn had spent the last year playing somewhere, that might be a different story.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:53 pm
Something ya’ll are missing about Quinn’s upside, to teams that may want to trade for him, is his pay. He got picked in the 20’s and he’s getting good money for a 20’s pick; but he’s not getting top 10 money. A team that traded a 2008 top 10 pick for him would get a potentially top 10 calibur QB with 1 year NFL experience getting paid like a 2007 low teens, early 20’s pick. Plus, those rookie salaries set records every year.
Just a thought; I have no dogs in the fight whether Quinn is good enough or not to lead a team so I don’t care where he plays.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:56 pm
Back to the point about drafting a qb top ten… I don’t see why any team would take such a big risk on such an unlikely proposition. Look at this year’s stats; only 2 of the top ten in the quarterback rating category were drafted in the first round (and only Peyton was a top ten pick). I don’t care if my team could use a quarterback, I’d sooner use a random top ten pick on Glenn Dorsey, Kenny Phillips, or Chris Long.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
Wow, how does anyone get worked up over a Seahawk/Browns game in November? Do Spencer and Jmorris have a history I am unaware of? That is serious trash-talking for a team that is lucky to be in the NFC West.
October 30th, 2007 at 6:01 pm
Ladies and gentlemen, your quarterback for the 2008 Minnesota Vikings … Chad Pennington. You read it here first.
October 30th, 2007 at 6:03 pm
mizerle06- NFL contracts typically escalate on a year to year basis, so Quinn will be making more money next year than he made as a rookie.
October 30th, 2007 at 6:07 pm
This power rankings list is what we thought it was.
October 30th, 2007 at 6:28 pm
I love the logic of whoever wrote this.
You have the second place team in the AFC West (Chargers) #8 while the first place team (Chiefs) is at #22. (Chiefs in first right now because of their head-to-head win over the Bolts)
What have you been smoking? Not only did the Chiefs beat the Chargers, they beat them at HOME. Which correct me if I’m wrong, is a pretty big deal in the NFL. Also, you have the Raiders (another team the Chiefs beat), only two spots ahead of the Chiefs. HUH?!
Let’s look at the teams ahead of the Chiefs.
9. Jacksonville Jaguars – Spanked the Chiefs, should be ahead of the Bolts also.
10. Washington Redskins – Most overpaid, and overrated coordinators in the NFL…oh yeah, Gibbs is up there with the Crypt Keeper.
11. Seattle Seahawks – NFC West team, home of the 0-8 Rams, and the “mighty” 49ers offense
12. Detroit Lions – I’ll agree with this one.
13. Cleveland Browns – Worst defense in the league
14. Baltimore Ravens – Paint drying is more fun to watch.
15. Tampa Bay Bucs – No RB, old QB, Simms son couldn’t even cut it in the Arena League.
16. Denver Broncos – They need ole horseface back.
17. New Orleans Saints -Started 0-3, and play in the NFC….are you kidding me?!
18. Carolina Panthers – Their QB started playing around the time the Royals were still good in baseball…that alone is scary.
19. Philadelphia Eagles – NFC team
20. Arizona Cardinals – NFC West team…
21. Chicago Bears – Better off with Hester as their entire team…oh wait….too late.
Bottom line, Chiefs have an solid D with a beast of a defensive player in Jared Allen, and a offense with weapons that just needs to mesh together (and the best rookie WR in the NFL). Come on now, the Chiefs at 4-3 at this point of the season?! Herm is doing something right. Come on now, no matter how high you put the Bolts, their cheerleaders still aren’t going to sleep with you….http://www.chargers.com/charger_girls/2007-squad/shelby.htm
October 30th, 2007 at 6:31 pm
The Maj,
Right. And, to be honest, I didn’t look up Quinn’s contract numbers. But, I would guess his escalated pay is still a bargain compared to what the 2008 top 10’s will get. Just an (maybe moronic?) assumption.
October 30th, 2007 at 6:35 pm
Quin can’t be traded because the Browns would take too big of a cap hit. Anderson is a RFA, so maybe a sign-and-trade? I mean, he’s better than 80% of the other QBs in the league, no?
@ YYSA: Yep, NFL teams never pass on the next Elway or Montana. Tom Brady? Well, they just pass on him 6 times.
October 30th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
I wish you were right about the Bengals
October 30th, 2007 at 7:46 pm
sometimes you just need a reason to get fired up about something and a little east coast bias does it for me. You should have gone with a Koren Robinson Joke, I like jokes about people who waste their talent.
spence096, you can have some for free…its green though.
October 30th, 2007 at 8:01 pm
in all honesty, the quinn proposition i proposed originally was just a hypothetical. anderson will be back next year most likely, itd be hard to imagine a team giving up a 1st and 3rd rounder (unless he doesn’t come back to earth) in return.
For all the talk about Quinn playing this year, it’s all but dead silent right now. To be honest, from the preseason looks, especially against the Broncos, he looked pretty good, but that doesn’t say anything. Seeing as I have interest in the team, I’d love for DA stick around, why have a potential chemistry issue if he continues playing well? Then, if Brady looks great again next year, and DA continues his performance, then maybe you possibly explore a trade similar to the Schaub trade. Granted this is all wishful thinking, but I’m bubbly with optimism.
jmorris…ah yes, the GOOD crack…sign me up anytime.
October 30th, 2007 at 8:10 pm
Derek Anderson is the next…. Scott Mitchell?
Lighting up the Bengals, Rams and Dolphins is nice, but let’s take a deep breath here folks.
October 30th, 2007 at 11:39 pm
Derek Anderson is the next Scott Mitchell? What? were all the David Klingler and Jeff George references taken?
I actually don’t mind the Browns at or around 13…and that’s saying a lot, considering I’m from Pittsburgh.
October 30th, 2007 at 11:50 pm
Spencer, I think you need to back off on your man-crush you have for Mr. Quinn. When Peterson “shatters Anderson’s pelvis into countless pieces” (very nice yes yes) you have to come back to this posting on Monday or the next power rankings and give a heartfelt apology to jmorris. I for one do not require an apology since I take comfort in the fact that we have Branch and Hackett back this week to open up the run game and take a giant sized Brown square in the Dogg Pounds mouth. Saw ahh and say sorry to jmorris next week k thanks…
TBL you keep up the tough work bud totin around that laptop and talkin about sports ALL day… You keep grindin it out mmmkay, oh whats the you have to wake up at 6 a.m. then sit in your underwear for a few hours and type? Ah wee baby, still tho TBL, diggin the website, where’s the nudity tho seriously bud? Super serious… more tatties and less Tony Homo celebrity watch. Take that shit over to perezhilton.com for christ’s sake.
October 31st, 2007 at 2:11 am
hey weezyheezy was that a baby stewie impression???…orr are you a homo
October 31st, 2007 at 10:00 am
The Steelers behind both the Titans and the Giants? Please, the giants ae the weakest 6-2 team in a long while!