Saturday, almost back-to-back, there will be colossal college football games with National Championship ramifications. Start with Verne Lundquist (we hope), cocktails, Gators and Bulldogs at 3:30. Go grab dinner with your girl and then get back in front the TV by 8 for the laser show in Lubbock. Don’t act like you’ll be up for going out Saturday night after the Friday mess that is Halloween. Lee Diekemper previews it all.

Northwestern at No. 17 Minnesota

No, this isn’t hockey. The Gophers are remarkably in the Top 25 in football! With a little help, the Gophers — the GOPHERS! – could play in the Rose Bowl. Despite playing in the Metrodome Saturday, Gophers fans are packing ponchos upon word Michele Tafoya will attend. Pick Gophers.

No. 15 Florida State at Georgia Tech

Well, well, well. It’s been a while Bobby. Glad to see you back in the Top 25. Hope you enjoy your brief stay. The Noles historically struggle with gimmicky offenses (see: Wake Forest) and the Ramblin’ Wreck’s triple option will give FSU fits. After the loss, Bowden will regale reporters with the time he coached against Amos Alonzo Stagg. Pick: Yellow Jackets.

Pittsburgh at Notre Dame

Two of the most overblown coaches in the sport match wits. As usual, Dave Wannstedt just can’t get out of his own way. The Panthers will beg for Touchdown Jesus’ mercy. Free beer at Jimmy Clausen’s house! Pick: Irish

No. 8 Florida vs. No. 6 Georgia at Jacksonville

Ever since Urban Meyer wet his pants over Georgia’s Gator Stomp last year, the Florida coach has been on a crusade for revenge. Saturday he gets it. In a desperate attempt to turn a critical swing state, John McCain’s camp leaked rumors that Sarah Palin is involved in a passionate tryst with Tim Tebow. Pick: Gators

No. 1 Texas at No. 7 Texas Tech

College football’s version of arena football will have just enough defense from the Longhorns to stop Graham Harrell. In a ploy to throw off Colt McCoy, Texas Tech offensive lineman “Mankind” plans to steal Rachel Glandorf’s media credentials. Pick: Longhorns.