Serena Williams: “She’d rather eat, half-ass her way through non-major tournaments and complain she’s not getting the respect her 11-major-championships résumé demands. She complains about being ranked No. 2 in the world when she’s not bitching on Twitter or her blog about new rules that forbid Wimbledon players from eating in the locker room. Seriously, how else can Serena fill out her size 16 shorts without grazing at her stall between matches?” Was he looking at this photo when he wrote those sentences? “BBWs — Big Booty Women — do not write me angry e-mails. I’m only knocking Serena’s back pack because it’s preventing her from reaching her full potential as an athletic icon. I am not fundamentally opposed to junk in the trunk, although my preference is a stuffed onion over an oozing pumpkin.” [Hidden, for Now]