Phillies 2, Giants 1: After giving up a lead-off homer to Eugenio Velez, Pedro Martinez locked it down, needing just 87 pitches in seven innings of one-run ball. He struck out nine to keep pace with Lincecum, who blew away 11 batters. Pedro digs Timmy — “He reminds me a little bit of me, but he’s twice as good as me at this time of my career.”  This can’t be any fun for Mets fans to watch. Instead of Derek Lowe, they got Ollie. And instead of Petie, who’s 3-0 for the Phillies of all teams, they got Livan Hernandez, whos’ no longer with New York. Well done. Oh, and Brad Lidge almost had a quiet, stress-free save. A messy postseason awaits him.

White Sox 5, Cubs 0: In his third career start, Carlos Torres breezed through seven scoreless innings. As always, Alfonso Soriano played some sick defense in left. Crosstown interleague rivalries just don’t deliver the same punch when the two teams are a combined 17.5 games out of first place.

Marlins 8, Braves 3: Hanley Ramirez cared last night. He tied things up with a pinch-hit single in Florida’s big six-run sixth. Dan Uggla went hitless on the night and Ramirez reportedly made matters worse after the game by wearing a tuxedo made entirely of $100 bills. Florida and Atlanta are both four games back of the wildcard.

Yanks 10, Blue Jays 5: A-Rod’s bat is coming alive which can only mean one thing — he groped a female police officer in Toronto.

Tigers 4, Indians 3: Detroit almost let this one get away after giving up three in the eighth, but Placido Polanco came up with the always visually pleasing walk-off sac fly to win it. Since joining the rotation, Nate Robertson has been impressive.

Dodgers 4, D-Backs 2: In his Dodgers debut Jon Garland (7 IP, 2 ER) was great. Of course he was, he’s a teammate of Randy Wolf’s now.

Brewers 4, Cards 3: John Smoltz (6 IP, 4 ER) took his first loss as a Cardinal but if he had been facing an AL team, he would’ve been taken out in the third inning on a stretcher.

Red Sox 6, Rays 3: Boston’s wildcard lead is back to three games. The trio of Wagner, Bard and Papelbon for the seventh, eighth and ninth innings is plain filthy. Their combined line? Zero hits, fives strikeouts.

Mets 8, Rockies 3: Pat Misch gave the Mets seven innings last night which is a victory in itself. In doing so, he brought some hope to Queens. The Mets need some of that.

Mariners 7, A’s 4: Since no one cares about this game, let’s focus on the winning pitcher of the evening, Ian Snell. How in the world is this Ian Snell?

This is really where the headline came from:

Pretty sure this guy was one of the Bushwackers.