I’m sure you’ve heard by now that tonight is a big night for free, televised mixed martial arts. You do like MMA, don’t you? Of course you do! Because you want your friends to think you’re cool. You’re not a square, are you? Here, let me light that cigarette for you.

Tonight marks a 3-hour block of UFC programming on SpikeTV that will make your head spin. (Maybe!) First, at 9pm, there’s UFC Fight Night: Diaz vs. Guillard. Then as soon as that ends, it’s the premiere of The Ultimate Fighter 10 featuring Kimbo Slice and a bunch of really big people. First things first…

UFN 19 Preview

This is a pretty good lineup to be packed into a 2 hour block for free. There aren’t any huge names or immediate title implications, but its a bunch of guys that I’m going to enjoy beating the shit out of each other.

Nate Quarry vs Tim Crueder – “Rock” Quarry is a former title contender that is so terrifying that Kalib Starnes – a professional fighter – once spent 15 straight minutes running away from him.  He’ll be taking on TUF 7 alum Tim Crueder who is 3-0 in the UFC. This should be fight of the night. I think Quarry wins a close decision tonight and continues his climb back towards the top.

Carlos Condit vs Jake Ellenberger – Condit was the 4 time WEC welterweight champion until his weight class was dissolved. He’s coming off a split-decision loss in his UFC debut to future title contender, Martin Kampmann. I got to see Ellenberger’s last fight (Bellator XI) when he served Marcelo Alfaia a delicious knockout 42 seconds into the fight. The UFC isn’t doing him any favors giving him Condit for his UFC debut. I’m taking Condit by submission.

Gray Maynard vs Roger Huerta – This is Roger Huerta’s swan song in the UFC. After this, he’s leaving to make movies. “El Matador” hasn’t fought since his loss to Kenny Florian over a year ago. Nobody is a fan of this decision. Thus, Joe Silva and Dana White are throwing Huerta into the cage with undefeated Gray Maynard, possibly hoping he maims him beyond recognition. If not for Huerta bolting after the fight, this would be the headliner with title implications. (Yes, that’s Huerta on the cover of SI up there.) I’m going to go out on a limb and predict that Huerta leaves on top. Unless he hasn’t been training. Boy, I hope he’s been training.

Nate Diaz vs Melvin Guillard – It’s not often that a guy coming off two losses headlines a card. Yet, here is Nate Diaz facing a black man with very colorful hair. Though, to be fair, his last two fights were decision losses to top contenders that garnered FOTN honors. Guillard has won two straight since returning to the UFC. Diaz by submission late.

The rest of the card also features… WEC LHW title fight rematch between Steve Cantwell and Brian Stann…. C.B. Dollaway will take on UFC newcomer, Jay Silva…. Rising star/monster Brock Larson versus UFC newcomer Mike Pierce…  TUF 8’s Phillipe Norver takes on Sam Stout… Other fights I don’t care to list…

Update: The Norver – Stout fight has been canceled. Phillepe Norver had a seizure in the locker room this afternoon. He’s OK and hopefully there won’t be any recurring issues.

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TUF 10: Heavyweights

It’s finally here – Kimbo Slice versus THE WORLD. This is the first ever season to feature just Heavyweights. That should make it the most boring ever! Wait, what?

I’m kidding. This season never would have worked 3 years ago. The idea of finding someone new for Tim Sylvia to lean on just didn’t do it for me. Now though, these guys are real athletes. It’s a whole new world. The season features “4″ former NFL players – Marcus Jones, Matt Mitrione, Wes Shivers and Brendan Schaub. (He was on the Bills’ practice squad. And he played in the AFL.)

Before I move on, yes, the picture linked under “real athletes” was to a contestant. Roy Nelson to be exact. You may recognize him as the guy that was lying on top of Andrei Arlovski at an EliteXC event last summer. Remember that?

Speaking of EliteXC, it’s Kimbo Slice! Remember when he killed EXC by getting KO’d by the guy with the pink hair? Well, I  got to meet and speak briefly with Mr. Slice on Friday (seriously) and it was only mildly jarring. (I just switched back to solid foods!)

In addition to Kimbo Slice, the new season will also feature former UFC title Light Heavyweight champions Rashad Evans and Rampage Jackson yelling at each other. A lot. By the end of the season you’ll be so excited to see them finally fight. Unfortunately, you’ll have to wait because Rampage is filming the fucking A-Team movie. I’m sure it’ll be worth it and will turn out to be a really good film. Fer cereal.

It doesn’t matter. They’ll argue and it will be entertaining because Rampage is a pretty funny guy. Everyone will want to kill Kimbo at first and then warm up to him because he’s a decent person. Some people will get knocked the fug out. Good times all around. Tune in. You do want to be cool, right!?