fedor-vs-rogers-poster1Sorry for the late start folks. Had some technical difficulties. Let’s not dwell on my tardyness. Let’s enjoy some world class mixed martial arts. It’s what Fedor would want.

The following took place before I had an internet connection to work with. I was blocked out by an 8 year old. Seriously. There’s a family thing going on at my house tonight. Anyway, let’s not dwell on my personal life. I’ve got some Labatt, so we’ll get through this thing.

- Playing up Fedor being an average Joe. Except he’s awesome. Love the shot of him in LeBron’s chair. I think they may have photoshopped Rogers into the chair.

- Strikeforce highlight Gina Carano, Cung Le and Frank Shamrock in their opening.

- Oh, hi, Gus Johnson.

- Somebody here yell what?

- Wedrum is already bouncing around the cage. Strikeforce is not making the same mistake that EliteXC did in their CBS debut – no messing around. They’re going to jump right in, both feet first. Good.

- Wow, Brett Rogers looks like he kicked Fedor’s ass in EA Sports: MMA.

- WAR IVEY!

Antonio Silva vs. Fabricio Werdum

- Big Foot Silva has the largest head in the world. Seriously. It’s a record.

- It’s incredibly anti-climatic to be live-blogging without an internet connection.

- If you follow me on Twitter, then I told you I’d have this up and running eventually!

- Silva just destroyed Werdum. Oh wow. Just devastating punches.

- I honestly, don’t know how Werdum is still alive right now. But here he is.

- Have I mentioned Silva is huge? He’s got the head of a characature.

- First round has to go to Big Foot, but Werdum won a moral victory.

- Silva is a dominating presence. He knocked Werdum down again to start the second. He looks like Shane Battier if Battier were Rocky Dennis.

- Silva keeps dominating, but Werdum is surviving.  He’s getting in a good shot every now and then, but he’s not winning the fight in anybody’s eyes.

- Werdum finally gets a takedown and is working for position. The kid’s got sticktoitiveness. I’m pretty sure that’s how you spell that.

- “Nothing like to heavyweights scrambling on the ground.” Right, but I don’t think that’s a good thing.

- DJ Hero? For people who don’t even want to pretend to play an instrument.  Call me when they have blogger hero. I’ll be Michael David Smith.

- Round 2 goes to Silva. Werdum needs to finish this.

- Wordpress does not recognize “Werdum” as a real word. For shame.

- Third starts and neither guy seems overly gassed.

- Werdum has Silva’s back. This could be trouble for Silva.

- I am in an unfamiliar setting for blogging.

- Silva with a few more big shots, but Werdum lands a couple nice looking knees. Close one. I can’t see this going to the decision, even thought it looks like it will with 2 minutes to go.

- Antonio Silva’s head has to take the freight elevator.

- Under a minute, Werdum on top. Good ground and pound from sorta-kinda-half guard.

- Good finish. Exciting fight. Both guys should have been knocked out.

- Let’s go to Fedor. Nevermind, let’s talk to his crazy Russian manager because Fedor doesn’t talk to the media. How didn’t they get Fedor on Craig Ferguson this week?

- Wow. Werdum with the decision victory. I thought Silva took that, but the second round was close to a toss-up so there it is.

jenn-brown-picture- For what its worth – Jenn Brown. Not for nothing, but she’s kind of got an Antonio Silva head going on. Pretty, but BIG. I’m so glad she’s not reading this.

- Did I mention I’m at my parents house with my laptop on a TV tray sitting in a computer chair in the middle of the living room setting my beer on the stove? True story.

- My mother is less than impressed with the sport of MMA. She still likes me though. She’s a cool lady.

Gegard Mousasi vs. Sokoudjou

- This is a non-title bout for some reason. I’m still not clear on that.

- Mousasi and Fedor are the most unassuming killers ever.

- I wish my brother was here to grab me a beer. Hurry back Matthew!

- It’s a “feeling out process.” Sweet.

- Our first shot to the groin. And Sokoudjou is playing it up with another. Methinks he’s not feeling this.

- Sokoudjou pushing, Mousasi unimpressed.  Gegard is very quick.

- Mousasi lands some strikes and Sokoudjou ends up getting the takedown. Mousasi with the revers and he’s on top in side control. Now they’ve picked up the pace. It’s a real chess match.

- Sokoudjou doing a great job. Maybe enough to steal the round.

- Until the final seconds. Very close. Sokoudjou doing a great job.

- That turned into a pretty good MMA chess match. Did I say that already? What time is it?

- Mousasi with bunches of punches there and Sokoudjou weathers it. Back to the clinch.

- Ground. And. Pound. Fuck. And. Yes.

- Great finish by “The Dreamcatcher.” What whimsical nickname. And Mousasi retains his belt!

- What do you mean his belt wasn’t on the line?

- My father will now tell me about how my high school is doing in sports this year. The man love sports. And he was quite happy to see Iowa lose today.

- /Mentions that Michigan also lost today

- And Notre Dame!

- Penny is dating Leonard? What’s up with that? Kaley Cuoco ftw.

- Smith vs. Le? I was off the internets today. That’s sweet.

Jake Shields vs. Mayhem Miller

- I’m rooting for Miller. I love Bully Beatdown.

- Great pace for the show tonight.

- Miller remains insane.

- A little less showmanship by Jake Shields. Just a tad.

- Shields with the quick takedown. Didn’t see that coming. That was my most outrageous joke of the evening.

- Miller looks very pale. The bullies must not have much of tan.

- Miller finally gets up with about 3 minutes left in the round. Missing a looping right hand and we’re back to the ground. Woot!

- Shields is doing his boring wrestling thing and Miller works it back to the feet again. Then a big takedown.

- I tell you what. That was a close round and Miller might have stolen it. He got a couple takedowns and finished on top.

- Miller comes out strong in the second. This is a very interesting fight. I don’t know how else to describe it.

- Um… can you strike to the back of the head in Strikeforce?

- Miller in a bad spot.

- A banana split? That sounds gay. Even more gay than most of the stuff in MMA.

- Shields is consistently a mistake away from getting that rear-naked choke. Finally gets out and up. Now he’s on top.

- Good second round. Shields should take that one being in the better position most of the time.

- Miller with the takedown to start the third. Shilds works to half guard. Miller remains cool and calm. I feel like he should be doing commentary.

- That’s where I would have done an impression of Miller if I could.

- Both guys gloves are coming un-taped. Or, just Miller. He landed a nice spinning backfist right before the break.

- Jake Shields is the better wrestler. I looked it up.

- The crowd doesn’t appreciate Jake Shields’ wrestling ability.

- OOOOOOOOOOOOoh Miller had him. Shields was about to get choked out. Perfect rear-naked. So close. Shields was, in fact, Saved By The Bell.

- Round FOUR

- *yawns*

- Sorry, that’s the blood thirsty side of me. Shields is doing his wrestling thing, not trying to do much.

- Knew the stand up was coming. Shields isn’t trying to win, just hold on for the win. Hey, it works. Full mount, roll. Transition. It’s a clinic by Shields and he always ends up on top. At least in the 4th.

- Another round for Shields. Miller needs to finish.

- Brett Rogers, still doing the press junket minutes before his fight.

- Much of the same to start Round Five.

- Shields on the back, looking fo rthe takedown. Miller fighting it off, trying to do anything else.

- Shields finally gets the takedown. The fans are nonplussed. He’s earning the win. It’s not super fun to watch, but it works. 2 minutes to go.

- Miller finally gets out. Almost gets the guillotine. Almost. Not really, but almost.

- Shields got the win. My father and brother enjoy watching wrestling and absolutely hated the fight.

- The fans were as excited about Shields’ victory as Miller.

- Jake Shields didn’t make any new fans tonight. Here’s why.

- Again, Shields vs. Miller opens the debate about holding someone down vs. doing something. Oh well.

Fedor Emelianenko vs. Brett Rogers

- Well, we’re finally here. Time for Russia vs. USA v. 2.0.0.9

- MMA fans love poker apparently. Or at least that’s what Full Tilt thinks.

- Oh, hi readers.

- Why is the crowd pro-Fedor? Isn’t Rogers from Chicago? And America?

- Big John will not take any of your bullshit.  No touch of the gloves. Here. We. GO!

- Rogers looks very nervous. Fedor is bleeding and gets the takedown.

- Rogers is doing a great job against the cage. confidence must be building.

- Way too much went on there to write down. I’m not a computer damnit.

- Wow. Rogers just reigned down blows. Fedor almost with the arm bar. What  round.

- That round was so fucking good I forgot to drink.

- USA! USA! USA!

- And with one huge punch….

- Great effort by Rogers, but Fedor is the best. His bearded entourage agrees.

- “I kill everyone” – Fedor

- “                    ” – Brett Rogers (CBS feed)

- Fedor – Rogers 2 would be a pretty successful PPV. Just saying.

- “The fuck is an Overeem?” – American Public

- Still don’t understand why Chicago loves Fedor and hates Rogers. Either way, good night. Good fight. See you all later.