The Roundup: Tiger’s Text Messages and Mack Brown is the $5 Million Man
Athlete Wives, Baseball, College Football, Media Gossip/Musings, NBA, NFL, Race, Tennis, Video December 10th. 2009, 8:00am
Ciara … impressive BAC – especially for 3 pm … who leaves $17,000 worth of Christmas gifts in the car? …cannibalism, anyone? … sad: Albinos under attack in Africa … women gets drunk on her birthday, end result is partial amputation of her leg … don’t eat the dead bear remains! … will the TSA security breach mean longer lines at the airport this Christmas? … love a good “inside job” prison break tale … teacher-student hookup doesn’t result in jailtime, but a judge calls its “gross” … Tila Tequila is engaged – to the Johnson & Johnson heiress …
The Top 10 sports moments of 2009. (TIME)
A million photos from the David Ortiz Celebrity Golf Classic. (Red Sox Monster)
Two women are going to try and row across the Atlantic. Naked. (The Sun)
Texas coach Mack Brown has become the first $5 million man in college football. (Statesman)
Read all of Tiger Woods’ text messages to the Las Vegas cocktail waitress. (NY Post)
“Should the NBA assist white players with affirmative action?” There’s a headline. (The Grio)
Major fantasy news: Steve Slaton’s done for the year in Houston. (Chronicle)
Now’s when you’re supposed to break out the violin for the Detroit Tigers. (Freep)
Dwight Howard’s baby mama to be on the VH1 show featuring NBA wives and girlfriends? (Miami New Times via Hot Clicks)
Hoping that Comcast is a “cool alternative” to ESPN. (NSJC)
So did Jon Gruden with in Tampa with Dungy’s players or not? (Joe Bucs Fan)
Bill Hancock – still an idiot. (WRAL Sports Fan)
The next big deal in tennis: 14-year-old Madison Keys. (Herald)
For sports expansion, Los Angeles is the obvious choice. (Portfolio)
This is the American public.
89 Responses to “The Roundup: Tiger’s Text Messages and Mack Brown is the $5 Million Man”
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December 10th, 2009 at 8:04 AM
This is Livingston Parish. I swear to God we are not all like that. But God Damn there are a lot of them around here.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:07 AM
BTW I have known about this video since Monday, and I didn’t have the guts to send you the link.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:07 AM
Any questions for Curtis Granderson? MIGHT be talking to him in 20 …
December 10th, 2009 at 8:07 AM
Tiger’s texts are great
December 10th, 2009 at 8:11 AM
CJ – you’re a woman … do you sense that Tiger’s like … jealous in some of those texts? or insecure? And remember in that email posted last week, he claimed to have dreams about one of the women hooking up with athletes …
December 10th, 2009 at 8:12 AM
no comment.
/really
December 10th, 2009 at 8:15 AM
would you mind moving to leftfield? because brett gardner is a much better centerfielder than you, and needs to be given the everyday spot.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:15 AM
I dont know about insecure.. but they seem immature/juvenile… like thats how you would have talked to a high school girlfriend or something. But yeah the constant asking if she had a boyfriend and all that was a little weird with him being married. I feel like maybe he didnt really get a chance to date as a teenager and this is that side of him coming out.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:17 AM
One of my professors in grad school said “You want to find out who the ‘average person’ is, go to Walmart on pay day.”
December 10th, 2009 at 8:18 AM
it sounded to me like Tiger hated the thought of his girlfriends being with black guys, especially giant black guys with giant black guy genitalia.
I did a google image search for Madison Keys, because I’m that creepy. It was mainly in the hopes that she didn’t look like Arancha Sanchez Vicario, or Dinara Safina. She’s going to inspire a lot of Greg Oden type age jokes, also maybe some Frankenstein.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:18 AM
no!
December 10th, 2009 at 8:18 AM
bingo. he’s reliving all the years of chasing skirt around that he missed in HS, IMO. why’d this guy get married?
December 10th, 2009 at 8:19 AM
those texts were pretty funny.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:19 AM
“Should the NBA assist white players with affirmative action?”
YES
Doug Gottlieb
December 10th, 2009 at 8:19 AM
TBL- ask him if he has any idea where to move to. tell him you hear Alpine is sweet.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:20 AM
TBL, I am sending you another Saints link dedicated to a scary, dentally-challenged Saints fan who was at the Redskins game. Of course the Fox cameras found him.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:21 AM
did Stanford not provide similar opportunities for hook ups?
December 10th, 2009 at 8:22 AM
Any questions for Curtis Granderson? MIGHT be talking to him in 20 …
Can you believe this Tim Donaghy story? Isn’t it the news of the week? Also, have you ever heard of my website? And isn’t it awful what poor Jim Leyritz is going through?
/sparty’d
December 10th, 2009 at 8:23 AM
between NCAA golf and US amateur golf, plus all the practice, he didn’t have time for a childhood.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:25 AM
awesome.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:25 AM
oh dirt, you just continue to be so cute.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:26 AM
hall monitor
December 10th, 2009 at 8:29 AM
are you prepared to be extremely overrated now that you’re in pinstripes?
December 10th, 2009 at 8:29 AM
Dwight Howard’s baby mama to be on the VH1 show featuring NBA wives and girlfriends?
I read somewhere he won a permanent injunction against her recently. she is banned from using his name. take that
December 10th, 2009 at 8:30 AM
or… he wasn’t filthy rich yet, leading to the jetting of whores globally, becoming podcast fodder for porn stars, and using his star power to plow $8/hour waitresses.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:31 AM
you know what, please ask him that, and give him the url. any unique is a good unique.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:32 AM
somebody’s salty this morning…
December 10th, 2009 at 8:35 AM
thanks guys, now let’s just hope it happens
December 10th, 2009 at 8:37 AM
tell us about the shoes.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:39 AM
oh, they were well off…titleist had struck an under the table deal with earl when tiger was still in his teens.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:42 AM
hey spencer, miz is finally going golfing for the first time. I told him to keep his fucking head down. anything wisdom you can give our little novice?
December 10th, 2009 at 8:43 AM
you’re going to suck, so imbibe. heavily.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:44 AM
shit. Go to the fuckin range first. Im glad i did. Im terrible.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:46 AM
free beer all day Saturday. I’m going to a driving range tonight to try to get a feel for it.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:46 AM
but you are going to love it when you hit that one shot that goes straight and true. i remember slicing or hitting grounders the first time I ever played, but when there was that first twack where it felt like you never made contact with the ball, I became hooked for life.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:47 AM
This is Livingston Parish. I swear to God we are not all like that. But God Damn there are a lot of them around here.
no comment.
/really
Who Dat!
/really had no clue about some of the bandwagon members.
0.39 BAC at 3 PM
Impressive. Was he a Saints fan?
/Who Dat
December 10th, 2009 at 8:48 AM
you’re gonna be sore as fuck tomorrow.
which is funny, i thought golf didn’t take any effort. hmm. i guess all those people are fucking retarded.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:49 AM
i believe that. it would be impossible that he wouldn’t have sponsorship that early – legit or not.
hell, i’m surprised he made it off of Carson without a shoe deal .. or did he.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:49 AM
so true.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:51 AM
I figured as much.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:52 AM
Tell Curtis thanks for doing everything he has done for the city of Detroit and tell him that we will all sincerely miss him because he really is a great human being.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:53 AM
you’re gonna be sore as fuck tomorrow.
I figured as much.
forearms, shoulders, calves. they will all burn.
recommend drinking while doing it.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:54 AM
Golfing is hard as fuck and I am a fairly accomplished athlete. I think of it more as a skill than a sport, but that is not in any sort of negative conotation. It is hard as hell.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:56 AM
my parents still live just outside the city, and even though my dad is a yankee fan, he is sad to see him leave the area.
December 10th, 2009 at 8:56 AM
@miz – wish I was livin wherever you are, so I could golf right now. Looks like the trees are gonna be uprooted over here, snow blowing completely sideways.
/lovin cleveland weather
December 10th, 2009 at 8:57 AM
not drinking at the driving range. I’ll be drinking on the course on Saturday though. thanks in advance for the free beer, Gator Bowl!
December 10th, 2009 at 9:01 AM
stringer – it’s actually supposed to rain Saturday. it’ll still be in the 70’s though so I’ll be playing.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:04 AM
The funnest part about golf when you first start is after you hit that one solid shot, and you’re kind of in disbelief, you think to yourself “holy shit, how’d I do that?”. From then on, you’ll be chasing that satisfaction that you got from your first solid shot.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:07 AM
i would hope that the Miz has long enough golf clubs, given his height. And that wherever he goes allows Jorts.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:08 AM
I’ll go on cold streaks sometimes where you go a few holes without hitting that feel good shot again…..makes you realllly appreciate Tiger, Phil, etc. being able to walk up to every shot and hit it damn near perfectly
December 10th, 2009 at 9:10 AM
no dress code that i know of at Fleming Island. the jorts may be making an appearance.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:10 AM
yep. and that reason, and that alone, is why sergio is my favorite golfer. fuck putting…that shit’s for pussies.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:13 AM
who dat! who dat! who dat gawn beat dem saints!
/shoots tv
December 10th, 2009 at 9:16 AM
has long enough golf clubs
No kidding. Have tried using normal people clubs and my back couldn’t take being stooped over.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:19 AM
dammit spence, get it right!
It’s “Who Dat! Who Dat! Who dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints!”
And we don’t bring none of them sissy-ass .22s here. Smith & Wesson 500 all the way!
December 10th, 2009 at 9:21 AM
don’t eat the dead bear remains!
there’s a list you can get on up here, and when a moose gets hit by a car (and the person who made the kill doesn’t want it), you get called and can come claim a recently killed moose. All you need is a pickup truck and some patience, because it’s a long list.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:23 AM
Fredo…id care more if that wasn’t the worst chant in sports history, well, aside from J-E-T-S and E-A-G-L-E-S.
and who had that chant first…the saints or the bengals?
December 10th, 2009 at 9:24 AM
ill take the who dey bengal bikini girl over who dat
December 10th, 2009 at 9:26 AM
you’ll get crotch rot. putting your “down there” in cincy womens’ lady parts is like putting metal in a microwave.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:27 AM
You betcha he did.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:27 AM
nice to see the town where i grew up make the roundup!!
December 10th, 2009 at 9:28 AM
Ha, I bet that mofo flexes in the mirror for 15 minutes every morning.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:29 AM
Do those texts kind of take away from Tiger’s aura?? I love Tiger, even after all of this ( I love Tiger the competitor, his personal life is just that ). But these texts seem like something a 14 year old boy would send?!?! They feel really insecure and Jr. High-esque. If I am Phil or a number of the other top golfers, I feel like Woods is a lot more mortal after reading those.
And did this girl sell those texts?? Surely she didn’t leak them for free.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:31 AM
and who had that chant first…the saints or the bengals?
Who Dats was started in the 1960s. Who Deys came into effect in the 1980s.
Who Dats win.
It’s derivative of mistrel/vaudeville chants.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:32 AM
who dey bengal bikini girl
Don’t make me call in “F**k Da Eagles” girl, ok?
December 10th, 2009 at 9:34 AM
Ask Curtis why he was a frontrunner growing up and not a Whit Sox fan even though he grew up on the south side of Chicago
December 10th, 2009 at 9:37 AM
because rooting for the white sox is like rooting for a child rapist.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:39 AM
you couldn’t be more incorrect.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:51 AM
I just read those Tiger texts and I’m not gonna lie I was kinda not feelin what Tiger was sayin about black guys. Like I don’t see Tiger as black, not at all, so I just hear a half white half Asian guy sayin that. Same thing with the interview when he was talking about black guys dicks. I dunno him and Derek Jeter seem to not really embrace their black side which is cool, they don’t have to but Tiger being insecure about his side bitch fucking black dudes was kinda strange.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:55 AM
just because YOU don’t see him as black doesn’t mean he isn’t still a quarter black.
December 10th, 2009 at 9:58 AM
yeah, Jose. All of us white people see that he’s black, and we don’t ever let him forget it.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:00 AM
if tiger’s any color, it’s green. green or transparent like a salamander.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:00 AM
isn’t he more than a quarter black. earl looked like a regular black guy.
anyway the story about the girl getting her legs amputated is ridiculous. be careful not to sit on your legs if you get so drunk that you’re going to pass out for 12 hours i guess.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:01 AM
Like I don’t see Tiger as black, not at all, so I just hear a half white half Asian guy sayin that.
Well I don’t see Ciara up there as black. All I see are long legs, a cute face and an unquenched desire to attempt to bear my children.
But that may mean I need prescription eyewear.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:01 AM
I know that, and I’m not suggest he isn’t black or others shouldn’t see him as black but I can only speak for me, and to ME it seemed weird because of the way I perceive him. I just said that because I wonder if other black people feel me on that or if I’m the only the one
December 10th, 2009 at 10:02 AM
also he did claim blasian which i am assuming black/asian, sounds like he “embraces” his black side or whatever that means
December 10th, 2009 at 10:02 AM
im pretty sure earl was half.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:03 AM
see and that’s why we’re different. I just see a hermaphrodite.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:06 AM
He also said that he hate when people call him black, that he is not black, that he cablasian and calling him black is offensive to his mother or some shit
December 10th, 2009 at 10:07 AM
did… did you just call me a bandwagon member? I’ll cut you!!!!
December 10th, 2009 at 10:08 AM
maybe he just wants his mothers and fathers heritage included.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:09 AM
Earl Woods had mixed Black, Chinese, and Native American ancestry according to Wikipedia
December 10th, 2009 at 10:09 AM
also he did claim blasian which i am assuming black/asian, sounds like he “embraces” his black side or whatever that means
honestly, that didn’t sound very embracing. It sounded self derisive to me. Like he was bagging on the chick for getting pounded out by black dudes, him included.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:09 AM
because rooting for the white sox is like rooting for a child rapist.
+1 SPENCE…..haaate the ChiSox
December 10th, 2009 at 10:13 AM
Well I don’t see Ciara up there as black. All I see are long legs, a cute face and an unquenched desire to attempt to bear my children
see and that’s why we’re different. I just see a hermaphrodite.
As long as her sword isn’t as big as mine.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:15 AM
I’m not questioning his blackness. Well maybe but all I’m saying is that I’ll perceive him however he wants to be perceived. and since I don’t know any white asian and black mixed people I don’t know how to stereotype him to my liking. He doesn’t want to be perceived just as black and that’s cool so rather than see him as ‘cablasian’ whatever the fuck that is I just eliminate black from the equation. Is it wrong/racist/ignorant of me? sure. But it takes less effort so, I don’t really care.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:23 AM
Are you kidding me? What a shitty list.
December 10th, 2009 at 10:29 AM
That video was awesome. God I love the south.
/am not a redneck but likes watching them do stupid shit.
December 10th, 2009 at 4:45 PM
Awww man! Another retard on the block??!!