Jonas Brothers vs. ESPN in Softball
1-liner, ESPN, Music July 30th. 2010, 11:23amJonas Brothers vs. ESPN: “The popular boy band, whose pick-up [softball] team is known as the Road Dogs, will take on the sports network’s G.O.A.T.S. (Greatest of All Time), a team made up of ESPN commentators, at noon on Aug. 13 at the Hardware City’s Rock Cats home field … The game was arranged after Nick, Joe and Kevin Jonas, appeared on an ESPN fantasy podcast. Fantasy guru Matt Berry, aka ‘The Talented Mr. Roto,’ challenged the guys to a game. Among those playing for ESPN will be Berry, Mike Greenberg, Michelle Beadle, Trey Wingo and Eduardo Perez.” If you’re attending, drop us a line. If Ashley Greene makes an appearance, sound the Drudge Siren. [Courant]
123 Responses to “Jonas Brothers vs. ESPN in Softball”
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July 30th, 2010 at 11:25 AM
What the hell were the Jonas brothers doing on an ESPN fantasy podcast?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:26 AM
I bet Beadle will be the MVP on that squad of misfits. Perez is the only athlete, but he was on the Mitchell report wasnt he?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:26 AM
It’s all over.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:27 AM
Jonas Brothers vs. ESPN in Softball
espn? I think you mean BSPN…rabble, rabble, rabble. Wah, wah, wah.
jimmy
July 30th, 2010 at 11:28 AM
Oh no, Im thinking of Fernando Vina. Sorry Eduardo.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:28 AM
The lady is the most talented player on the roster. Softball and otherwise.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:29 AM
Ha.
Thank goodness for Rivals Radio and NFL Network so I don’t have to watch this shit.
/masturbates
July 30th, 2010 at 11:29 AM
Alright so I just read the Simmons column and this is a point he made that’s so stupid
“There are two separate issues here. The first: Nobody wants to spend 3½ hours watching anything on television. Not even porn. The second: It’s not that fun to spend 30-45 minutes driving to a game, paying for parking, parking, waiting in line to get in, finding your seat … and then, spend the next three-plus hours watching people play baseball … and then, leave, find your car and drive home. That’s potentially a five-hour commitment. Ludicrous.”
Isn’t that for every sport? Besides college basketball? NFL games last 3 to 3 and a half hours, I’m sure it takes a while to get to your seat,wait in line for food, wait to get out of the parking lot. NBA games are about 2 and a half hours, probably close to a four hour commitment, college football is close to a five hour commitment.
Simmons is just a idiot.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:30 AM
Mike Greenberg? Doesn’t he suck at sports?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:31 AM
Every time I hear something about the Jonas Brothers, I always think of this
July 30th, 2010 at 11:31 AM
he is very good at putting lotsa words on a page. and before I found the little slice of heaven that is this blog, he was all I knew.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:32 AM
I agree with that. But Simmons’s attempt to change every sport to his liking is ridiculous.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:32 AM
Didn’t we cover Simmons in the Roundup?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
The popular boy band, whose pick-up [softball] team is known as the Road Dogs, will take on the sports network’s G.O.A.T.S. (Greatest of All Time), a team made up of ESPN commentators
Jeremy Green is crying uncontrollably in jail at the thought of missing this
July 30th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
Wingo supposedly has plus-plus power to all fields.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
Like, all he had to say was “I don’t like baseball”. Boom.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
I’m gonna need to get Mathew Berry’s VORP before I can make a prediction.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:34 AM
I used to listen to Berry and the other guy’s fantasy football podcast (believe me I need all the help I can get) and is Jeremy Green the guy who would host the show afterwards and they would always make fun of?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:34 AM
Kenny Mayne is the only on-air talent/non-former pro athlete that has any talent in Bristol. They better get him on the roster.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:34 AM
/Fixed
July 30th, 2010 at 11:35 AM
/Milwaukee’d
July 30th, 2010 at 11:35 AM
He’s +2.4 in WAR.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
At least now I know where to tell them to aim the hijacked plane.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
Well done on the coding, mike. Normally, that would have been a jumbled mess of italics and bold.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
Exactly. So if he goes to a football game, can I ask him in his mailbag if he enjoyed his 5 hour commitment?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
+.08
July 30th, 2010 at 11:37 AM
fellas, go back to yardwork and check this out. I asked TBL for a comment on yesterday’s AM roundup, and he replied, What happened, Roast?
I replied with ‘banned’
maybe i should say how much i’ve enjoyed my time her with all of youse goons
July 30th, 2010 at 11:37 AM
Hmmm, can I get a ruling on this one?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:37 AM
Jesus. Does ESPN even care about being legit anymore? Fucking joke.
Beadle has been bringing the heat on SportsNation all week.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:38 AM
Yes, they would always make fun of Jeremy Green at the end of their Fantasy Football podcasts.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:39 AM
Thank goodness for Rivals Radio and NFL Network so I don’t have to watch this shit. Or if anything happens anywhere, or doesn’t happen
/masturbates
fixed for penis elbow
July 30th, 2010 at 11:39 AM
Simmons has always been the “I’d rather watch it from my living room” guy. Personally, if you’re a rabid fan, I think that stance is bullshit. If you’re really passionate about the team you root for, you want to go watch them in person, time commitment be damned.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:40 AM
I took some adderol so I’m on top of things.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:40 AM
I wonder if they feel bad about it now
July 30th, 2010 at 11:40 AM
Whatever happened to Orestes Destrade?
/clap yo hands
July 30th, 2010 at 11:41 AM
Looks like the work of someone that took 30mg. Well played.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:41 AM
I took some adderol so I’m on top of things.
i snorted salsa once
July 30th, 2010 at 11:41 AM
He also brings steroids into the fold…guess that means he doesn’t look fondly on the Super Bowls won with Rodney Harrison on the roster then?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:42 AM
you should try snorting it… it worked wonders for me last night.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:42 AM
Doubt it. It’s clear the fucker deserved it.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:42 AM
dammit Roast!
July 30th, 2010 at 11:43 AM
Simmons also complains about fans not really being into a game in which the Sox had a 9 run lead after two innings…in the middle of May. Isn’t this pretty normal? Any game like that I go to, I no longer wait until an inning is over to hit the beer line.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:43 AM
Simmons suffers from the worst case of “I’m an only child and I was extremely fortunate with my upbringing, hence I’m a gigantic pussy”-itis. I think he’s funny, but he has a lot of Two-ply in him.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:43 AM
pixie sticks
July 30th, 2010 at 11:43 AM
addies are the shit. took some at the lake last weekend, good times, good times.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:44 AM
Oh wow, this.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:44 AM
Yeah, that Simmons article definitely needs an FJM’ing in the worst way.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:44 AM
I laughed out loud at this. then threw up in my mouth. I think I’m gonna pull a Constanza ans sleep under my desk.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:45 AM
Going over to the Wisconsin Dells this weekend, should be fun.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:46 AM
Exactly. Also, his parents were divorced, so he got the only child syndrome, plus the coddling that goes with divorced, affluent parents. Quit being a ‘gina, and go to the games.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:46 AM
I’ve got to disagree with you on this. The experience of watching a game at home or over someone’s home is so advanced nowadays that I think that type of thinking is just outdated. Trust me, I committ hundreds of hours a year, pay for jerseys(just got my Colt McCoy in the mail) and NBA/RedZone/MLB packages but I see maybe a combined 8 games between all of my sports, and I used to have season tickets for the Braves and Falcons at one point. I’m no less rabid about my sports and probably spend the same amount of time if you don’t count driving back and forth to games. I just don’t think that that ranking fans based upon in-person appearances is that relevant anymore.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:47 AM
i snorted salsa once
pixie sticks
Tanqueray
July 30th, 2010 at 11:47 AM
STORY TIME!
July 30th, 2010 at 11:48 AM
Dude… next time go to Lake Geneva or Apple River. The Dells are dumpy and have too many kids.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:48 AM
Who watches porn for more than about 15 minutes?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:48 AM
Going over to the Wisconsin Dells this weekend, should be fun.
have spent some quality time there. swig at nig’s, ripley’s, maybe if they still have that giant swing where you get winched up 100 feet in the air aand pull yer own cord, and just outta town there’s am awesome dune-buddy/go-kart track where they don’t care if you trade paint
July 30th, 2010 at 11:48 AM
Good stuff by Mr. CFB on Masoli (plus a bit on the stupidity that is Bryce Brown).
July 30th, 2010 at 11:48 AM
Also apparently Red Sox fans helped inspire Pedro Martinez to be great by standing and cheering when there were 2 strikes on the batter
Give me a fucking break
July 30th, 2010 at 11:49 AM
‘gina
best guess: the pronunciation is not geeena
July 30th, 2010 at 11:50 AM
So glad he didn’t end up at the U.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:50 AM
in college a brother sent a link to 24-7 streaming I just kept the window open in case something inspiring came on.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:50 AM
Nothing in Wisconsin is fun. That state is a shithole. I would say nuke it, but taking away their fried cheese curds and ranch dressing would make those fat Wisconsin slobs suffer even more.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:50 AM
hell yeah. my brother met his future wife life guarding there in the summer back in the day.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:50 AM
have spent some quality time there. swig at nig’s, ripley’s, maybe if they still have that giant swing where you get winched up 100 feet in the air aand pull yer own cord, and just outta town there’s am awesome dune-buddy/go-kart track where they don’t care if you trade paint
some classic mis-types in here
July 30th, 2010 at 11:51 AM
Those who have been desensitized and can only get by with snuff films and German BBQ porn.
/not me, a guy I know
July 30th, 2010 at 11:51 AM
The most determined dog in the world.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:51 AM
I enjoy the story lines. For example, one minute Mike is attempting to rent out his apartment and the next he is in Brazil! How does this happen without some movie magic?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:52 AM
The Dells is awesome.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:52 AM
I agree. Watching a game at my house on my tv is really nice. I enjoy going to games, but not a ton of them. The hassle is a bitch a lot of the times and the view is so much better at home. Plus I get cheaper booze/food and a much more comfortable environment. I’m not saying going to games is bad, but watching them at home has gotten so much better.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:52 AM
I enjoy the story lines. For example, one minute Mike is attempting to rent out his apartment and the next he is in Brazil! How does this happen without some movie magic?
and how about in the sequel, when Brazil cmae to him! remember?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:52 AM
I go back and forth with this–on the hand, going to games, tailgating, screaming and getting extravagantly hammered is awesome.
On the other, spending a fortune and getting into fights in the beer line, eh.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:53 AM
I’ve seen all of Busty Cops 3. It took me about 8 different viewings to do it, but I’ve now seen it all.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:53 AM
This statement would be true if we had the UP but thankfully Michigan was willing to take it off our hands to complete a nice dichotomy in the two pieces: Rednecks on the left, Unemployment on the right
July 30th, 2010 at 11:53 AM
snuff films
at the end, i’m always thinking…why’d they have to kill her. She seemed so nice.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
fellas, go back to yardwork and check this out. I asked TBL for a comment on yesterday’s AM roundup, and he replied, What happened, Roast?
I replied with ‘banned’
maybe i should say how much i’ve enjoyed my time her with all of youse goons
it just occurred to me that TBL was fucking with me, and had addressed the issue a lot earlier
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
damn dude, someone from Wisconsin pee in your cheerios when you were a kid? there are a whole lot more shittier places than Wisconsin, a couple of them even share borders with the state.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
I was always a sucker for the ones about the door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
I hate nic cage but now I wanna see 8mm.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
Bryce and his brother had so many red flags around them. They had that idiot “advisor” who was charging teams for info and both of them had serious ego issues. I think they’re both going to K State now, but I’m not entirely sure.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:54 AM
Not sure I buy that. Nothing beats big game ambiance in person. You’re not getting that at your house, no matter how big your tv, or how clear your HD. Maybe it’s because college football is #1 on my list, but watching on tv takes away a lot.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:55 AM
Too bad Mike didn’t hitch a ride with Captain Stabbin to the Caribbean. I am sure that would have been epic.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:56 AM
What was his take on it?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:56 AM
it just occurred to me that TBL was fucking with me, and had addressed the issue a lot earlier
well I’m not banned, but I haven’t heard from Spencer at all today. So maybe spencer got the boot.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:56 AM
See: Iowa, State of
July 30th, 2010 at 11:57 AM
What did he say about the roundup? I missed it?
Did we do a roll call this morning, just in case?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:57 AM
Pussy.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
I wonder how many viewings it would take Petino to get through it.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
What was his take on it?
I asked for a comment on AM Roundup yesterday in yardwork. he typed “What happened Roast?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
College is much better than the NFL in person. The atmosphere before the game on campus is what makes it so great. The tailgating and all that goes into it.
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
+1
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
Tanqueray
STORY TIME!
it was in college at a bar, typical Thursday night, unfortunately not a great story to tell. more just stupidity on myself and another guy’s part-lol
July 30th, 2010 at 11:58 AM
Captain Stabbin to the Caribbean
PL’s a pornstar?
July 30th, 2010 at 11:59 AM
I wonder how many viewings it would take Petino to get through it.
divide by 15 seconds
July 30th, 2010 at 11:59 AM
This is the one advantage I give college over the NFL (although Camp Randall not selling beer blows)…although Lambeau still rocks pretty good but they’re a different situation than most in the league
July 30th, 2010 at 11:59 AM
Having had beer and pop come out of the nose, I hate to think how much snorting 80 proof gin up would be.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
State of, sure. City, no. I’ve never advocated anything outside of Iowa City. Except BeBop’s milkshakes and Tasty Tacos in Des Moines.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
If income wasn’t a determinate factor, I would be at a lot more live sporting events than watching them at home. If there is a football game I care about, I hate being home watching it. I need a crowd.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
Be that as it may, it’s damn expensive going to a pro game. Shit adds up like a mother fucker.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
This is all true. The only way the NFL comes close is for night games and playoff games. Going and seeing an NFL game in person is still fun, but while you’re there you’re also all the time wondering what’s happening in all the other games that are going on during the six-hour combined time it takes to get to, park, see, unpark and get home from the game.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
i got no problem with Masoli coming to the sec at all, he’s a good player, but I don’t think he helps ole piss all that much really, their offense is going to be medieval this year. I just hate that the biggest hypocrite coaching is the one that is getting him, a week after saying they had no interest in him. that, of course, was before his backup QB quit the team.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:00 PM
His brother was at Miami, but left when Shannon wouldn’t play ball with the advisor…who I believe is a convicted felon.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:01 PM
Innuendo?
July 30th, 2010 at 12:02 PM
LIE. See Gathering, TBL Midwest.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:02 PM
I don’t know of a college stadium that does sell alcohol. that is where the pint in the boot is key.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:02 PM
If income wasn’t a determinate factor,
so if you were leading a life of leisure, you’d make sure to fill your life with leisure activities?
July 30th, 2010 at 12:03 PM
Arthur Brown was incredibly hyped. Bigger bust, Arthur Brown or Willie Williams?
July 30th, 2010 at 12:03 PM
Nope. See here. My standard order was two flour tacos, one flour nacho and an enchilada. They had the best hot sauce I’ve ever had.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:03 PM
This. On top of the tickets, I know I’m gonna drop at least $30 on beer and grub, plus parking.
I love going to games but it is only economically feasible a few times a year.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:03 PM
Metrodome used to. Kinnick does in the box, not in the stands.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:04 PM
The Los Angeles Coliseum. Owned by the City.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:04 PM
The ones that are off campus are allowed to I believe, that used to be the only decent thing about the Gophers playing in the Metrodome
July 30th, 2010 at 12:04 PM
I think there are a few that do, but it might be limited to box seats.
They do sell beer at the motor city bowl which is awesome.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:04 PM
i got no problem with Masoli coming to the sec at all, he’s a good player, but I don’t think he helps ole piss all that much really, their offense is going to be medieval this year. I just hate that the biggest hypocrite coaching is the one that is getting him, a week after saying they had no interest in him. that, of course, was before his backup QB quit the team.
Chances Masoli gets in trouble given the amount of sorority girls at Ole Miss? 100%? 200%?
/listening to early samples of Daft Punk’s soundtrack to Tron Legacy
//mind tripping
July 30th, 2010 at 12:06 PM
Yeah. I know that they sold beer at the CU-CSU game for a few years when it was at Invesco, but they pretty much shut that shit down. The concourses were one big fistfight.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:07 PM
So true.
Ark: I agree. The dude won’t have any connection to his receivers or know the offense. By the time he gets used to running the system, they will be halfway through the season. It’d be one thing if Ole Miss was like Nebraska in that they were a QB shy of being really, really good. All this does it put them at 5 wins instead of 4.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:08 PM
U of Minnesota wanted to sell beer in premium seats and boxes, but was shot down by state legislature. Got rid of beer sales in the lofts at Marrucci and Williams too.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:09 PM
Willie and it’s not even close. Especially when you think about how he crashed out. Arthur could go on to be really good, you never know. Willie is a cautionary tale for recruits and will be for a long time.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:09 PM
Mr. Locker Room Letter isn’t coaching at Arkiesaw anymore?
July 30th, 2010 at 12:10 PM
That’s the great thing about conference basketball tournaments – the booze. I used to down $8 Buds by the dozen at the Kiel Center.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:23 PM
Also apparently Red Sox fans helped inspire Pedro Martinez to be great by standing and cheering when there were 2 strikes on the batter
He must also be inspired by soft echoes of people speaking French in an empty stadium.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:26 PM
Old Orange Bowl, sold beer right in the tunnel by the student section. They also sell at the games at Joe Robbie/Pro Player/Dolphins/Landshark/Sun Life Stadium. Got sloshed all the way through 3 quarters at a game a few years back.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:27 PM
please.
July 30th, 2010 at 12:27 PM
This. Dude looked like Ray Lewis in his high school footage but once he got here he could not even pick up the basic packages and did not start.