A Detroit Lions 2012 Preview in Ten Haikus

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First round Nick Fairley
On pace to retire with
more arrests than sacks.

Running back draft picks.
Best, Leshoure, Smith, Calhoun, Jones.
Waiting for Barry.

Oh Matthew Stafford!
Gilded arm blessed by the gods.
Please don’t get injured.

Calvin Johnson is
the target of fantasy.
60 million locked.

Bull-rushing monster,
Unnecessary roughness,
Ndamukong Suh.

Jason Hanson was
the Lions’ starting kicker
when this scribe was eight.

The Lions drafted
three Oklahoma Sooners.
Expect one bad loss.

Long-suffering fans
thankful to be relevant.
Nightmares of Millen.

If Allen Pinkett
truly understands football,
Super Bowl assured.

2011 Record: 10-6 [Their first 10-win season and first finish above 3rd in the division since 1995, first season above .500 since 2000.]

Schedule: The Lions play six of their first nine games on the road, including trips to San Francisco, to Philadelphia and to Chicago for a Monday night game.  The flip-side, if they can weather that barrage, is five of their last seven are at home. Only their Dec. 9 trip to Green Bay has the potential for bad weather. They have not won there since 1991 (Pre-Favre). So, don’t give up on Stafford or Megatron if they start slow in Fantasy.

Big Moves: Re-signed Stephen Tulloch (MLB) and Jeff Backus (OT). Lost Eric Wright (CB) to Tampa Bay and terminated Aaron Berry (CB).

[Photos via Presswire]