Police Searching For Shirtless South Carolina Football Stadium Thief
By Ty Duffy
South Carolina police are on the hunt for these two criminal masterminds, caught on security camera stealing stuff from Williams-Bryce Stadium on Sunday. One of them violated what should be rule No. 1 of petty crime: if you have a distinctive chest tattoo, wear a shirt.
Police did not reveal what items the pair stole. The guy on the right appears to be carrying beer. There is only one man who should be wandering around the stadium halls at night shirtless, absconding with stuff.
Steve Spurrier is the man. Not many head coaches would go shirtless and shoeless at practice. pic.twitter.com/KkeqSqKIIO
— Christopher Meyer (@CPMeyer) August 8, 2013
We can all hope South Carolina’s holy of holies was not penetrated by these rapscallions. Downloading “Sandstorm” again on Kazaa and finding someone who still has a CD burner would be true pain.