Houston and Chicago are having a Bean-measuring contest … Police officers involved in Dominos dustup … EPA chief mired in swamp … Cardinals swoop up Greg Holland … Mets icon Rusty Staub dies at 73 … Amal Clooney’s new clients … Funny dad crashes daughter’s proposal … The Onion unionizes … Sister Jean has officially made it if she’s getting trolled in the name of capitalism … Let’s bring Cargo shorts back … Love to say my hometown smells like rancid dog food … Giancarlo Stanton set a StatCast record … A Bible, some weed, and an inmate’s scheme … Paul Ryan possibly in it for the long haul … Joel Embiid looking at a long layoff … The continent of Africa could be splitting in two … Andrew McCabe’s GoFundMe going well … Kirk Gibson has his own seat at Dodger Stadium … Appeals court rules Adnan from Serial deserves new trial … Kristin Cavallari
Connecticut congresswoman kept on aide months after learning he threatened to kill subordinate. [Washington Post]
The Vatican would like you to know that the Pope didn’t exactly say there’s no hell. [USA Today]
Facebook execs keep stepping on those pr rakes. [Buzzfeed]
Legalized sports betting would be a boon for advanced analytics’ bottom line. [Sports Handle]
Westworld, season 2 a-coming.
Robin Lopez really went off here.